Duncan's Blog

I'm prolific (in writing, anyway). Sometimes I come up with a title and then jot down a few words. This holds my space/place in queue for something to say.
A few times, I note that I might start something on the last day of the month at 8pm or 9pm and the writing will post to the next month.
Where is HipForum's calendar and clock?

I never liked being in the position of having to bargain. So often I would have a mutton-headed dolt on the other side of the table who thought she could just say no to everything and then go back to his/__/their/her 'people' with a smile and say, "Let's give them a written response." Those were moments when I would usually say something like, "You are incompetent for these negotiations, and you seem to be clueless to the format and purpose. It is not my job to train you!"
Most of the advice that I offer (not give) is on a take it or leave it basis. I seldom claim to know the answer to all (or even most) things. About the only thing that remains black-and-white in my world is that one and one and one are three. The response is the same (assuming one is using base ten) whether one uses fingers, beads, a calculator, or pencil and paper. The response is timeless. And the response can be proven anywhere and at any time.
But when it comes to concerns of the heart or the mind, even the sociologists, psychologist, and intervention specialists have notions that might vary depending on prevailing voice(s) in their respective disciplines.
The second love of my life was a young man I had met while I was a freshman in college. He was seven years older than I and he was returning to college after the war that he had escaped had ended. He made me smile and he made me laugh. He played the role of the fool and often pretended to be the naive simpleton from the Midwest. This was before the era of the Golden Girls.
He was a pothead and liked to get buzzed from beer. He drank malt liquor. His breath smelled of beer and weed. At the time, I smoked cigarettes, and he let me know how disgusting everything about that product was to him. He also was not 'out' and would not identify with or even admit to having any affiliation with anything that was gay.
I thought my love for him would make him realize that another person's love is more important than these momentary highs. Boy, was that a big mistake.
That was 49 years ago. He's been retired from school teaching for over a decade. He lives in western Florida, and he tokes through a vape. His health is in general decline. He has difficulty walking and he has undergone a number of optical injections to deal with illness that would have affected his vision.
He's one of those folks who wouldn't initiate a call. He's one of those folks who doesn't race to the phone when it rings. He's one of those folks who doesn't build a directory in his phone... he guesses that it must be I on the other end because the caller has a California area code.
He left me when I was still in college. He even sent a letter back to me without opening it. Years later (when I had moved to CA) I tried reaching out to him at his father's address (my last known address for him). He agreed to reconcile a friendship, but we never really moved forward. At times I wonder if our relationship was taken or left...
He gets a card for Halloween, Thanksgiving, xMas, and his birthday. There are times I wish I could say, "I love you," to him, but he would probably recoil. Who wants to love a person who recoils? It's like petting an animal that winds up spitting on or biting you.
Still... I pass along advice of mine that I have picked up over the years. Don't fall in love with someone who must have alcohol with the meal, with someone who curses in public regardless of the audience or venue, with someone who lights up a joint without asking for approval first, with someone who is assaultive, with someone who cannot hold your confidence... my list is extensive!

I think of the question usually about food. I think of most things usually about food.

What I mean to say is, I think about how difficult the question is to answer when someone asks, "What's your favorite pasta? or potato? or soup? or cheese?"

Of course there are those who would ask your favorite car? favorite sexual position? brand of smoke(s)? actor? color? restaurant?

As I age, I find I have fewer and fewer favorites of things. I often think that things become 'favorite' because they are easy to prepare or they don't require much thought. That's probably why foods made of two ingredients are so popular; peanut butter and jelly, spaghetti and tomato gravy, cold cereal and milk, tuna and mayonnaise. I don't even think I have a favorite ice cream any more.

I wonder if I should be sad about this. Nah!

There are two that come to mind... cumin and cilantro.

It seems counterintuitive to put something into a recipe if I know I don't like the smell or taste of an herb or spice. To me, cumin smells like armpit and cilantro tastes like soap. Always has been. And I have been able to detect it in someone else's cooking as well.

The secret to these things is to determine whether or not the ingredient is essential. What this means is, can the dish be made without this herb or spice or can the dish have a substitute for it.

My usual example for this is Costa Rican spaghetti. The preparation calls for cilantro. And it's a pretty big amount. So instead, I use Italian parsley. No one detects the difference. Cumin, however, is another matter. The only things I could come up with were not necessarily 'better' to my way of thinking. Then I read somewhere that cinnamon might be a good choice. With cinnamon you can use the stick for cooking and then remove it when it is being plated (sort of like what's supposed to be done with bay leaves).

Of course, there is the option of looking at another recipe for the same thing.

"Disturbed body image refers to a significant alteration in an individual's perception of their [sic] physical self, often leading to negative feelings and emotional distress. It can manifest through various behaviors, such as avoidance of self-viewing, persistent comparisons with others, and concerns about sexual identity and attractiveness. This condition is associated with various psychopathologies, including depression and anxiety, and can significantly impact a person's self-esteem and social interactions. Effective interventions, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, are often employed to address and improve body image disturbances." (offered by artificial intelligence and ascribed to NurseLabs.com).

The subject title is French for 'Some Lose Weight. I Remain Fat.'

When I was younger, I was able to follow the rules and order of standard weight watcher type diets. I didn't buy or eat things that were excessively fatty and I generally looked for low- or no-fat products as well as sugar-free ones. Of course, when I was younger, I was also younger. The body opted to act differently. I was able to burn calories easier. I had more ease of motion and greater range of motion. These days I can lie in bed and scream myself through a leg cramp.

I don't think of being outside or of walking. Any form of physical activity short of hand-washing dishes is an unpleasant thought. I generally force myself to take a 3-mile round-trip walk to ALDI or the DOLLAR STORE just to pick up something that I don't need. The walk is done for the exercise. Do I feel better about myself for having done it? NO! I return home tired. I think of the lost time from television. And I know in the scheme of things this is not even a drop in the bucket.

So what's the answer? Starvation is not an option. The possibilities are pretty limitless. Meals can be planned based on food groups; dairy food groups, grains group, protein group, fruit and vegetables group, fats and oil group... The dieter then decides determines how much of each group needs to be consumed within the course of the waking day and then follow the plan. The determination would have to be made by someone in-the-know on such things. And how is this stuff measured? It's generally done by weight or volume, although it might also be done based on percentage. If it's going to be measured in percentage, then the dieter has to determine if this is per meal or per day. Percentage can be a bit dicey because it doesn't account for portion size.

Then there are diets that focus on eating specific foods and eliminating specific foods from consumption. The most popular one that comes to mind these days is Keto. It's high protein and fat and almost zero carbohydrate. Not a great choice if you like grains (wheat, oats, rice, barley, corn). I only recently gave up rice after having it every day for the past three years. Next I am going to look at bread.

I am at a point where I need to knock down my HgbA1c as well as knock off 40-50 pounds of excess weight. Well, at least the summer is over which means I don't have to worry about showing off flesh.

I'm sure this topic will be revisited. (Technically, I did post something about this topic back in 2016. Diet And Exercise | Hip Forums).