Jimbee68's blog

Like I said, I recently got that letter from the police commission saying that they see no wrongdoing. And Wayne County Probate Court and Eric still want me to believe (or play along, I don't know which) that my case doesn't even exist. The damage done to me, the lifelong care I will now need, the pain and suffering it will create, all the special needs I will now have certainly exist. But they don't agree for some reason. And now Eric leaves me because like Evalyn, I did the wrong thing by complaining. And like with St. Scholastica grade school, and Sinai-Grace in 2004, I need to be taught another sick, moral lesson with that. So now the police will always be part of my legal argument, and for the rest of my life. I would rather spend the little time they left me with finally enjoying some quality of life free of the abuse. But they have other plans. Nothing is being done, and even if they told me it was I couldn't believe them. I'll never really know when this is over. And if people can lie on sworn legal forms and judges and police can steal themselves, we know what they are capable of too. And like I said, if the argument they are trying to make is like Dr. Bazini and Oakwood hospital made in 1989, and possibly Dr. Chang and the Frank Murphy Hall of Justice did in 1992 with that plastic gloves can lead to "infection and death" comment, that I am morally weak because they abused me and made it seem suicide was the only way out, I will always make clear. I am not suicidal and never have been. I have always had a strong desire to live no matter what. But the abuse was extreme, it was nonstop for decades, and they would never listen to any reason even when I tried. Following me around to parks, telling me they didn't approve of my interest in sports cards, telling me they were suddenly going to take away my car even though I told them it would destroy my life and they knew I was a good driver. And all that abuse that started in Sinai-Grace Hospital in 2004, leading to seven years of suicidal ideation. Which seem to have surrounded the fact I am gay. And that will always be central to my argument and my case. Like I told them at Sinai-Grace this last time I was there, I will always bring it up. And it probably has something to do with why the police and first responders where harassing me and wouldn't just let me live my life in peace. It certainly is how this all started in St. Scholastica grade school in 1982 with Andrew Long, Jr. I've never had a problem with that. Certainly it was never a choice. And I never thought that just simply having those thoughts made me a bad person. And most or all of my adult life I have identified as gay. But they had a problem with that. At the Fairlane Town Center in 1998 for example some of the merchants and staff there told me they didn't approve. Even though it was none of their business and it was unlikely they'd even know. But the local police and first responders do put me in a lower status. Lower than even the worst criminal that they think they can just take things away from me like my car even though they knew what that would do to me. And they feel they can treat me those other ways too. Since my case is still going nowhere, I will have to spend the rest of my life making so that is all investigated and looked into. Because it endangered my life and almost destroyed it. And I wonder if it happened to anyone else. If it did they may just may never know. I know my therapist told me I could get a lot of people in trouble with this. But I think it is time we do this. And I know most people would agree with that.

And I don't mean to repeat myself. But I think it is important to make this clear. If I am ever asked do I feel suicidal. If I am ever asked do I feel like harming myself. If my political views on assisted suicide or time terminating care ever become an issue. If I am asked do I feel desperate. Are my thoughts going wildly out of control. Am I get irrational. My answer will be the Detroit police, the Dearborn police and Oakland County police every time. And the rest of course, I will list after that. And I will go into detail, as I usually do anyways. It's not cruel, it's not even insulting. It's just true. It's what happened every time and it is obviously what the problem will be next time. And since I still live in total secrecy, since I am still being hurtfully lied to, since I am still having my consent denied, all while I am lied to about it. Since I will never know when this is over. And since that really was the argument right from the start, that I don't have the legal capacity to make my own decisions, I will just always repeat that. Every time and in every new situation. Because nothing has changed. And what else can I do?

EDIT: And I forgot to add yesterday, what I will say when I find myself at the end of my life, and I find myself faced with end of life decisions. Which thanks to Wayne County Probate Court, the Detroit and Dearborn police, the Oakland County police and Eric, will come much sooner than it would have with all the permanent damage they did to my body. If I am faced with the decision of pulling life support, or the decision of assisted suicide, which like most Americans I support, I will say it was all their faults. They got me to this position, they damaged me, they took away my rights, they treated me like this, they think I have less status in their eyes than even the worst felon. And now I am at this point because of them. The police followed me around and harassed me, when I did nothing wrong, and they should have been spending their time and tax payers' money doing better things, like watching the actual criminals. They tried to endanger me and destroy my life by taking away my car. Even though I am an excellent driver, and like I said, they wouldn't do that to the worse criminal. And now they continue this horrible deception. I'll never know when it is over. As I said, I read online there is no legal justification or necessity for perjury or lying to someone in the legal system, about their legal status or any other thing. Not even the most extreme case. And my case is not extreme in any way. And yet they did it me, and they continue to do it. They continue to lie even long after they have been exposed. And even if they told me it was all over and all resolved, I would still have to assume they are lying. Because I know now what they are capable of and I know they don't care who they hurt. Now a lot of people know that too. So if it ever comes up again, that is what I will always say, that will always be my sole legal argument too. Why I want to terminate life support. And why I want to use assisted suicide, if it comes to that. Even if the Detroit, Dearborn and Oakland County police try to save me from myself, the like Oakland County police did with one of Jack Kevorkian's patients when they took away her pain medicine. I will just keep making the argument it is all their fault. They brought me to this point, they are trying to harm me and take away my rights now, I have less status in their eyes and I'll never know when it is over, I'll say. And they are doing it even now, I will point out. And I will explain how and why. How they did it in the past, and how they are doing it now.

And like I said, I am permanently damaged. I am left without family or any financial or personal support for the first time in my life. I am left with a shortened lifespan filled with medical and mobility needs I never would have before. And it's plain whose fault it is, even if they refuse responsibility. Even if they claim the problem is imaginary. It's the police, Wayne County Court, and I am sorry have to say again, obviously Eric's, fault. They knew what they were doing, they had plenty of time to stop, they saw the damage, they saw how wrong it was right from the start. And I have been a handicapped person with Cerebral Palsy all my life. And probably a couple of other undiagnosed things, people tell me. I have been weak and vulnerable all my life. And all I said above about the loss of all financial or personal support is going to complicate all that. Plus all the needs I don't foresee in the future. How could I? I am not a doctor. But doctors obviously saw all that early and they knew, I had Cerebral Palsy. How could they not? So many doctors I've seen all my life. Someone saw something obviously. And the police and others took part in the exploiting and harming of a handicapped person like that. It doesn't matter if they didn't know I had all those problems. To be an accessory before the fact, you only have to prove the person knew about some planned crime, any planned crime, and intentionally aided or encouraged its commission. And they did also know they were driving me to desperation, making me think twice in 1989 2004 that suicide was the only solution. And then for seven years after 2004. And it doesn't matter what their intent was. Some personal grievance the police had, some private political agenda may have been involved too it seems. Because knowingly and deliberately, there is no difference. If you knew what you were doing, you were doing it deliberately. And that will always be my position on that, all of that. Especially if someone ever tries to say again that I am morally weak because people like Oakwood Hospital, Dearborn or Sinai-Grace Hospital and the Dearborn police made me feel there was no other solution. I am not suicidal, I have always had a strong will to live. But if I even end up in the emergency room again because of them, that will always be position. I will go into all the detail of what they did in the past. And I will say, I don't know what they did this time to lead to it. But it must have been something. So we will have to start looking into that.

And now like I said, I will have to live the rest of my life with all these expensive needs and unforeseen costs now. No one wants to take legal obligation for that, because my case still doesn't exist. (And no, being forcibly taken to a Detroit group home is not an option. Where I'd have to live from then on forever relying on the bus. Because no, I would not find that fun, and no I do not want to try it even.) I would still say there is some moral obligation. But the people involved still see none and apparently have none.

Like I said, Wayne County Probate Court, the Detroit police, the Dearborn police, Oakland County police, and others, apparently including Eric, put me in a lower status. I have less worth to them and less value in their eyes that they could do this to me. Damage me like this, keep me in the dark, keep the damage hidden from me for years. And continue doing it long after they've been exposed. Treating me like a child, taunting and teasing me, telling me the problem doesn't exist and the physical damage I obviously have is all make believe. In all this time not the slightest progress has been made and not the slightest change. And I will be fighting this and dealing with it for the rest of my life. Unless they stick me in one of those horrible Detroit group homes, where they lock the doors. Then I won't even be able to cry out to the world for help. And they wouldn't do this to the lowest criminal. They wouldn't harm him, especially with medicine. And then deny him his informed consent, and continue doing that, by not even telling him what is going on. I might even be dying now for all I know. Maybe of kidney failure even as we speak, as I've said. And a criminal the Detroit police, Dearborn police and Oakland County police would be concerned about if he lost his car. How would he get to work? How would go to his doctors? How would he live his life now, they'd ask. They didn't think I'd manage, they didn't care at all. And having a valid license and a good record? I heard an officer recently say on TV that even when people don't have those things the police rarely get involved. Because they think they can get way too personal with me in a way they never would with even the worst felon. They view me as having no rights, no consent, no say in anything. And they didn't care the danger they'd put me in, the destruction it would do to my life, how I'd live my life then. They would with a criminal, like I said. And now that they have shown what they are capable of, since we are still playing make believe while I am damaged and may be dying, all I can do it expose it. Expose it for the rest of my life, even though I am in my final years now. Final years forever shortened by them too. Expose it. And that is what I plan to do, since I will clearly never have peace.

So just to review, now that the names of the people who destroyed my life, leading almost to tragedy sometimes, are exposed. I want accountability. Whatever accountability is possible. St. Scholastica grade school of Detroit destroyed my life and led me to points where I almost ended it sometimes by teaching me sick moral lessons. Like in the 5th grade, that passing notes (or having my "plan A", "plan B" etc. to talk during class, whatever) made me a bad person. That they thought I was good up till that point, but knew then they were wrong. That for fat-shaming Clarence "Jamie" Kivela during recess in the 6th grade, I deserved to have my whole life destroyed. So that people on the phone and blind men could tell I was ugly. I was too ugly to marry, too ugly to beg even. That almost led to tragedy, until fate intervened in the summer of 1984 with my wild time-travel plan. And then Thomas J. Emerick, my alleged best friend, and his friend Kendall Tucker tormented me for the rest of recess. Until one point I was cowering by the wall with my stocking cap over my face crying hysterically, all while the continued to do it. And I still don't know what that was all about. Am I really that ugly? Am I deformed? And why can't I tell the way I look when I look in the mirror? That sad chapter in my life has never ended. And all for fat-shaming Jamie Kivela. Or the 8th grade, when Andrew T. Long, Jr. didn't like the fact other boys were even thinking about him. So he started a tragic sequence of events with the mental health system of Michigan. Which has now left me damaged with a shortened lifespan, alone and without support, and with an uncertain future. Especially now that if I really lost my feet, and my hands too, the Detroit, Dearborn and Oakland County police might finally get their wish. I may never be able to drive again. And then I'd lose my independence, my medical consent, I'd be in danger, I'd be unable to cry for help, I'd be unable to do the simplest thing or perform the simplest task. Which is what they always wanted for some reason, even though I am a better driver than most. And there was horrible abuse and people with serious traffic offenses right in my neighborhood. And then Oakwood hospital psychologically tortured me for over a year starting in 1988. I still don't know why. But it seems to teach me a sick moral lesson of how the mental health industry can do that to people in Michigan and there is little or nothing they can do. Like that blind, crippled woman Evalyn, like I said. And then since 2011 my legal guardian Eric and Dr. Keon Chang of Westland have been secretly medicating me, raising my dose of Olanzapine, all while it was damaging me and leading to permanent effects I will be dealing with for the rest of my life. All while Wayne County Probate Court, and now that commission for police complaints that I recently got the letter from, tell me my case doesn't exist. The damage is imaginary, the financial costs I will face someday is imaginary, so is my shortened lifespan, and all the years I've lost to years of abuse. Years of abuse that couldn't have ended tragically on more than one occasion, thanks to that attitude.

Well, I could go on. But I think I will leave it there. But I want accountability as I said. If the statute of limitations hasn't run out I want all involved, including Eric, to face the strongest legal penalty possible. And to pay me full damages for all that I will need now for the rest of my life. With special emphasis on the car, my independence and my safety and medical consent. Since that is what this has been all about right from the start like I've said. And the rest of the people above from St. Scholastica grade school and the rest, who have moved comfortably, thinking that they had left me in dust long ago. I want some accountability there too. Whatever is possible. Certainly that they be exposed, so people know what kind of people they are and what they are capable of. And I think they should at least lose their jobs. And whatever other financial assets that could be taken from them, now that civil action is not possible. And maybe like I said early on, their wives should consider divorcing them. Unless they like being married to people like that.