You're looking at it entirely from a black and white perspective. There are lies designed to protect yourself, there are lies designed to make yourself look better, and then there are lies designed to protect someone else. I think this falls into the latter category. Personally, I don't like hurting someone's feelings. I think telling them "I dont want a relationship" is pretty much telling them whats up. I figured out when I was 17, the first time I was ever delivered that line, that it really means "i dont want a relationship with you. If the guys I'm dating at 25 years old can't figure this out and allow themselves to be strung along by a girl that makes it incredibly clear she's not interested, well, thats not really my problem. I would rather a guy tell me "I dont want a relationship" than tell me the real reason he doesn't like me. I think being blunt about why you dont like someone would mess with their self confidence more than any white lie.
i don't know, i still think a lot of people tend to just take what the person they're interested in tells them at face value. if the person just says "i'm not ready for a relationship right now" that could easily be interpreted as "i need a little time, but you still have a shot." the whole point of just saying what you mean is to avoid such confusion. it might hurt more right at the moment to hear what about you is turning someone off, but then it gives you a chance to think about changing whatever it is about you that people don't like. that would hurt a lot less than thinking you might still have a shot with somebody, and then suddenly seeing them with somebody else for no apparent reason.
i see what your saying, but the problem with that is its usually not even any specific thing a person is doing that causes someone to not be attracted. Chemistry is unexplainable. I know the reasons i'm usually not interested in a guy isn't something a guy can really change. I'm attracted to guys that are ridiculously intelligient. I can't exactly tell a guy "sorry, I think you're stupid." That wouldn't help anything. A person can't change their intelligience. And even if they could, it would only make me like them more as a friend and conversational partner. They can't change whatever it is in their body chemistry that makes me attracted to them on a primal level.
