Worst view on love...ever

You'll meet "the one". And marry that person. And within a few years, you will change, she will change, and neither of you will be "the one" for each other.

 

Yeah i appreciate that.. people obviously do change during certain periods of there life, thats the risk i am willing to take though. I think i am old enough not to be changing personality wise anyway (IT AINT GETTIN ANY BETTER THAN THIS) ..

 

I think that you have been very, very hurt in life, not just with romantic relationships but elsewhere, perhaps by your own family, friends? Almost every post that I read of yours is negative. You appear, at least on these forums, as absolutely miserable to me. Perhaps my assumption is incorrect, but it seems blantantly obvious. Either that, or your main objective on these forums is simply to cause upheaval with others for your personal enjoyment.

 

Yeah, my soon to be ex-wife says I'm the gloomiest, most miserable human being ever.

 

Not true, i am .

 

You must have experience this yourself firsthand to make a statement such as that. Otherwise, how would you know?

I have been with my husband for 9 years. I've changed, yes, but for the better, as has my husband. I honestly feel more close to him now than the day we were married. We have been through hell and back, yet we've come out stronger. I'm not saying that I can predict that the two of us will be together for all eternity, although I would like to hope so, but there is no sense is dwelling on what "might happen". I'm taking life one day at a time, thankful that I'm still here to enjoy it when I was so close two years ago to never making it out of the ICU. Because of that, my attitude has changed dramatically. Life is what you make of it. Live for the day, because there might never be another tomorrow.

 

RE: You must have experience this yourself firsthand to make a statement such as that. Otherwise, how would you know?

Read the "ex" part above.

 

Are you in the process of a divorce then?

 

Well if this is indeed true, I do sincerely feel for you.

 

No, instead we're in this weird limbo where we're living together for the sake of the kids and the bills.

 

My parents were blissfully married for over 40 years. Right up until dad died. He's been gone 11 years and my mother still misses him.

I was married for 10 1/2 years and it was the longest 20 years of my life.

 

Ahh, so you're a father then...I had no idea.

Well, as a child from a divorced set of parents, I will say that my parents, my mother mainly, tried to salvage their marriage for the sake of my sister and I, and it only caused us more emotional damage. They would have been better off divorced instead of sticking it out for us kids. All I saw was fighting, screaming, sleeping in different rooms, and absolutely no love between them whatsoever. Recently, my mother confessed to me that she never really loved my father as he loved her (and yes, he did, if she said the word, he would be back with her to this day), she married him to get a ticket out of her abusive home. It hurt to hear that in a way. I couldn't imagine marrying someone without any love there. But, it happens obviously.

You know, you kind of remind me of someone. Bug Man, or sumtinbuggy. Hmm.

 

Well, there's the issue of bills, etc. We can't afford two households.

 

Well I don't know your financial situation, but if the two of you are unhappy together, I would think that you could find at least some way to get out of the situation you're currently in. You don't want to live your life in misery, and you don't want your children to see that either. Believe me, they see it.

 

Well, let's put it this way. She has no education and no skills, and we have a child who's nursing all the time. Daycare would cost more than she could afford if she got a job (raising two kids on a min wage job?) and I can't afford to live + pay her bills + the kids' bills + daycare (10-25K per year)

So as it stands we're living in the same house. She can cruise guys and consider herself independant, but she still gets nagging and bossing privileges plus she controls all the money.

Bliss.

 

Well that royally sucks. I feel for you.

 

Well, she could always find a lawyer and get herself legally granted my entire paycheque, so I can consider myself thankful that I get to live in the home I work eight hours a day to pay for.

 

Ouch. I guess that's a silver lining then, huh?

 

Yeah, the best I can hope for is that my entire life will center around chauffeuring, making money for, and being bossed and dictated to by a bitter and distant human being, watching my kids grow up.

 

Geez, that sounds awful. I'm really sorry. Sounds like you got the shit end of the stick.

Can you believe it, I just swore on Hip Forums. Mark this down on your calender, because I think this is the very first time. Guess there's a first for everything.