when is the best time

ok, see in my situation, I just asked if I could have her phone number, after she drove me home from the bar (I walked there, because I only live 7 blocks away), I insisted that I could walk, and she told me no, she wouldnt let anyone walk home in the rain (it was only misting) she asked me if I had a pen, and I searched, which I didnt, but she found one, gave me her digits, and that was that. so IM guessing she is somewhat interested in me, because it didnt take much effort on my part, unless she gave me the wrong number, which I hope she didnt do

 

you worry too much Ryan. just call her she sounds like shes interested in some way

 

uhh that happened more than once in a couple months time...... the first one told me that I made her uncomfortable, when I sent her flowers, and the other one played around with me for awhile, while she was playing with someone else, and I ended up getting hurt.

so I dont send flowers anymore only to my mom!

 

yeah, it sounds like this girl is interested in seeing you again, for sure.

 

yeah thats what all my friends tell me......

Ill just take it one day at a time, and Im not going to wimp out.

 

see the thing is that if she really likes you it won't matter. I would say wait about 24-48 hours or else she'll assume you are either too arrogant for asking for her number and waiting to call her or that your just kinda interested-which is a turn off.

 

yeah, but wouldnt she be turned off if you seem too interested?

 

two days is perfect. it depends though really on the girl but if you wait too long she will think you are cocky and that is a huge turn off.

 

ahh okay, two days it is

 

good luck

 

Why should there be a "rule" about this?

My feeling is, you should make that call when you feel comfortable doing it.

That might actually be the very next day. What if you felt that you and she had a phenomenally good time together on the first date, and your enthusiasm about spending time with her is just coming out your pores?! CALL HER!

If the chemistry really was there, she's going to be hoping to hear from you again, right? Do you think there's something gained by making her sweat and be all distracted thinking about you for the next few days? Do you really want to be all about playing her like a fish on a line, waiting to set the hook? I personally don't like a big "game" made out of it.

Ideally, when you get the number, you should tell her how soon you plan on calling. If you left it all open-ended, sure, a few days is good. If you said, "I'll call you this Friday and hopefully we can make weekend plans together," then no need exists to call her before then.

But if you said nothing to her about it, but you have a good feeling about the romantic prospects, go out the next day and put some flowers in her mailbox and call her later that day! The card should say something about how you enjoyed spending time with her the day before. If you want to be a straightforward, honest guy, don't dance around the issue, don't "play" her, just let her know how you feel and see how it all progresses. Even if it doesn't work out in the end, at least you have the satisfaction of knowing that you let it be known what you wanted out of the situation (a romantic relationship). If it works out, GREAT! If you get shot down, at least you don't have to wonder and worry that you didn't get your desires made known.

-Jeffrey

 

Now that I wrote a big long post I read you here saying much the same thing!
Oh how I wish romance really could be as simple as we're saying here. Why can't it be passionate, and perfectly alright to call the next day and tell a girl how crazy you are about her?! Shouldn't that make her all warm and fuzzy? Why should she think it's pathetic or desperate or something? That's not axiomatically true just because you get called the next day.

Why should the guy sit there stewing and forcing himself to wait even though he wants to call right now?

Why should the girl have to wait for a few days wondering if the guy liked her enough that he's planning to call?

Get it done!

-Jeffrey

 

Ahh, you've gone in for the "if you seem to interested, it's too easy for them, and they won't be interested back" myth.

I look at it this way:
If I spotted a girl that I was way attracted to, and she came up and did all the work to set up a future date, would I be like, "Whoa, she actually is interested in me, and wants to date! Surely I must now be utterly unattracted to her because I don't have to do any work or play any games to get her!"

Of course I wouldn't. All a person being "interested" means is that the hard part -- proceeding in spite of not knowing if they're interested or not -- is done. You can then go right on to getting to know and love each other!

If a girl is going to be so shallow that it matters that much to her how interested I seem at the onset, then she's not the one for me anyway. I would much rather find a girl who is hoping that I'm gonna seem interested, because she is interested in me!

Blue skies,
-Jeffrey

 

right but sometimes if you are too interested, and they arent that interested in you, that usually turns them off right away..... like there was this girl I was interested in, and she was partly interested in me, but partly interested in another guy, and I ended up getting the heave ho.

 

ok, but what if you call, and you get her answering machine?? usually I take that as bad, because Ive had bad experiences in the past where they would just ignore my call....

would you call and if she doesnt answer, would you put a message on there, or try again later?

 

Day after.

 

ok would you avoid the person you gave your phone number to, ever??

 

Me? No.

 

The next day.

 

What nonsense! Why is it being desperate to call her the very next day? Screw those kind of games. If you're interested, and you want to call her, than just do it. Why wait? I'd have more respect for the guy if called me the next day instead of playing silly mind games and waiting. JMHO

Peace...