What Are You Doing Right Now?

Pretty much just getting all my camping stuff together now, playing some pool in between.

I can see how far I've come with pool now just playing shots, like how my mind now looks at a shot and I don't think of the angle I need to hit that on to sink it, I more look now at, well where the white ball going to end up?

I'm also adapting to using English(spin) on cue ball now too without really thinking about it. Just knowing table position, if this balls contacts here, then I need such and such English to contact here and here lol.

My camping is almost done now just gotta get a small block hammer for knocking my pegs down etc. Also need my food but i practice boiling my veges in my firepit and all good there.

 

I wished I liked hummus...but it just tastes like slightly flavored dirt to me.

There is a part of me that wishes (sort of) that I could be more vegetarian...not vegan...I gotta have my dairy products.

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I'm also very hungry but it is way too late for me to start eating.

Drinking water, so I can wake up 10 times and have to go pee. smh

 

Not even the name hummus is appetising lol. That's definitely not attracting any winners my way with its... brownness either. :d

 

Using my Hungarian Gyppo bloodline to steal some emojis from some inattentive hf member.

 

Have to take Grayson and Minxy to the vet today. grayson has his free check up with any vet courtesy of the SPCA with a vet, but not holistic ones.....stupidity.... I have to make a decision today about her 3rd distemper shot, I guess. I have no clue. Will ask my vet questions about it first. I wish i had my holistic vet that cured Minxy';s inflamed stomatitis gums so she can eat like a normal cat to go to with all of these pets, but I cannot afford her for everyone, unfortuneately.

Minxy has been itching her ears, so i want them to check her for ear mites and fleas or an infection.......She has not seen this vet for 2 years, as she does go to the holistic vet, when I need it. She is due for another rabies shot....but holisitc vet said that would not be necessary.....one is enough, she said for any pet....so i will say no to that today.

 

Complaining to a coworker about work. Maybe not a wise idea.

 

Another photo of Grayson two nights ago on the windowsill next to my computer. he was annoyed with me trying to get a good photo of him here. He is not the sweetest kitten always...although, he can be at times. Sometimes he is a real bitch.

He is not going to be very happy very shortly now, with me loading him into his cat carrier for the long ride...and Minxy always hates it, too...vomits and shits all over herself in there in the car most times...I hope she doesn't do that today. Oh, fun, here I come.......

 

No shots for Minxy. My vet did not push for them, either, after I made my speech......Minxy only weighs 6.5 pounds? She saw this vet over 2 years ago and weighed just over 4 pounds then,.. No ear mites, fleas....but a slight amount of bacteria and yeast in her ears.....which I have to give drops for for a week.

Grayson weighs 4 pounds. His weight has doubled since I adopted him. They are checking his stool and will let us know about that....but all signs pointing great health for this cat! He had his 3rd distemper shot today, and I can wait for his 6 month birthday to give him his rabies shot.

He won't be going out until after 6 months, anyway, if he ever goes out.

 

Drinking a superfood juice shake, and then going to work out

 

Looking at the ocean then down at my phone then up at the ocean then sipping a beer then up at the ocean then writing this

 

Careful you don't get whiplash

 

I wrote that fast but I was doing it slooooow.

 

2:37am

Eating Spaghetsck with portabella mushy.

 

you have underwater phone to be looking up at ocean? also how is beer not full of salt water? i know this must be some kind of penguine thing.
reminds me of someone's song about being at home under the antarctic ice. not sure who sung it. i think lillypad probably but maybe fan thing from some movie.

 

Watching the leaves change colour

I hope its just your mood? And not something that lasts for awhile..!

Some people get a bit gloomy in autumn which has just started here, but i suppose summer is still kicking where you live? Hope you feel different already!

 

Thanks, it's not really a Seasonal Affect thing. It more or less became severe with Doc's death a couple months ago, then I got severely rejected from a girl I fell for, did some stupid stuff and I've been drinking quite heavily this past month. Although there was even some other unfavorable events that preceded those things this year.

I'm fairly certain I'd never act on it, but I have had suicidal ideation crop up in my mind for the first time in awhile and I kind of want to get back on Ketamine.

 

On a different note, I'm kind of feeling like trying new things, new people, perhaps not elevating people who share similar interests with me as much and just tone down my zest and passion about things a bit. Although ironically, I'm sensing I also need to become a bit more conceited, or at least self-focused.

I'm fairly introverted, so as far as meeting new people and adding those different perspectives, I'm not sure how easy that'll be.

 

Oh my yes, that is an unfortunate combi of events and experiences that surely would impact my feelings negatively as well! Very understandable and if delt with constructive ly very temporarily as well! But that's always easier said than done of course.
Definitely keep a routine next week(s) where you don't sit in the house all day keeping to your self would be my advice. Go for a daily lengthy walk or bike ride or something, not talking about sporting/working out but just like stay in motion and get fresh air every day. Otherwise you will probably prolong it. Just sharing my own experiences here! Often people just wanna stay inside alone doing their own thing all day during such moods.
I for one used to prefer avoiding all chances on getting in another romantic relationship or encounter for months after a severe rejection just to avoid getting that feeling again. It's still easy to give in to that but it will only prolong miserable feelings. Ah well we all learn best through experience i guess

(Btw not saying i get into the 'game' as soon as possible now after a confronting rejection but i don't avoid it as retardedly rigid and long as i used to)

Dealing with the death of a friend or a combi of those things would get anybody down for awhile though..! Hope you realize it will pass how lame it may sound. Take care!

 

I'm sorry.......Asmo gives you good advice,. I cannot do any better than that advice.

I had two big losses with fur babies ...not even time to fully recover from the first loss, and then have to deal with another.....I have to keep busy and active and gettng something accomplished every day. It is the best medicine...as well, as exercise and being outside....

yes, rejection is hard for anyone.....but just know there is someone someday that probably will love you.....for who you are....finding your glass slipper, in other words.....

I have gone through a few very hard rejections in life, and at the time , the pain of it felt like it was going to kill me...but with 20/20 hind sight now.....I am glad things did not work out......They were not for me.

I hope things start looking up for you,.

 

Trip to vet's yesterday was traumatic for both cats. Grayson slept for 12 hours straight...would not eat anything.....meowed, like he was in pain, when I picked him up....as I was worried about him at2 am this morning and missed his live wired self downstairs here after dogs went upstairs to bed. He always comes down when they go up...not last night...so i went up to his room to lift him off his chair where he had been since we got home yesterday...and he meowed like he was in real pain.....so i gently put him on the bed in that room and layed next to him softly petting him and talking to him....for about 20 minutes....then I left him and came back downstairs......He came down and walked around a bit, after I left...but did not want anything to eat......

He was stuck in the basement again when I woke up...so we had to put the dogs out so he would make his way back up to his room a little while ago, and he did...i will offer him shreds of real chicken in awhile and see if he is back to eating today shortly......I had nightmares about him last night.....and I know they were due to my worry.

Minxy was traumatized by the trip, having a thermometer stuck in her butt cavity...and she hid in the basement after we got home yesterday. She is herself again today.....though...i am so glad i said no to any more vaccines for her......

One more rabies for Grayson, eventually....and then no more ever.

On way to vet...Minxy vomited in her carrying case all over and Grayson let loose the biggest diarrhea......I had to clean everything before we even got to the vet's, after stopping car.

Minxy is too delicate.......Grayson was , too, yesterday.....