What Are You Doing Right Now?

Watching Columbo, just sent a thread to MeAgain about lawnmower issues!

 

Oh ok. Damn, talk about timing. I'm fortunate enough that my lawn isn't too big to where I would need a riding mower, just a push mower. It sounds like it doesn't matter which kind you get, your still going to have issues. And the repair shops are swamped with repair requests and backed up for months before they can get around to fixing anything around where I'm at. Sucks!

 

Waiting for Bob's Burgers and Orville to watch on tv. Just flipping through channels and watching rerun of Modern Family and eating tortilla chips.

 

Quiet and reflective, but am ready to write now here today.
yesterday was sad....very sad all day, and I was just quiet, doing all kinds of laundry that Spanks bled on while he was here the last week from his mouth. Drip, drip, drip from his mouth onto his blood soaked legs, as he kept laying on his legs and dripping on his front legs mostly......He looked like the joker the last week here,......as blood was all over the bottom part of his face, and if i tried to clean him there, he would move away in pain, so I stopped trying.....to clean his mouth and around his face.

He wanted to be part of things here until the last minute . He wanted to go out on Saturday, and took his last walk to the stream, which is quite a walk for him from this house, as that is where he always liked to hang out....He went down the bank and sat in the muddy water...drank a sip there and tried to wash his legs. he had a hard time making it back up the bank so I helped him, and carried him back to the house. he wanted to go in the dog pen and hang out in one of the dog houses there. he never did that before. he wanted to sprinkle his spirit everywhere, so that we would always think of him every where....every nook and cranny.....of this house and the outside......He never complained and tried to show love. Only once did he get angry....when I had the kitten in my bedroom with a make shift litter box in there over a week ago...Spanky came in there and angrily was trying to paw out all of the litter onto the floor.....I told him to stop and he did...what a heart wrenching moment....so i moved the kitten out for the rest of Spanky's life and back into his room.....and took the litter pan away.

Saturday night was pretty heart wrenching here.......Spanky's legs were stiff and he walked liked a zombie with them outstretched in front of him.....He kept moving to different spots on the main floor.....rolling from side to side, trying to get comfortable. i knew his death was imminent, so I gently picked him up, and washed his legs in the sink with antibacterial soap and his tail.....and swaddled him in a soft towel to dry....He went limp in my arms against my chest where I told him he would always be in my heart......and i thought I killed him or put him into a coma moving him and washing him.........but he was still breathing , so i put him back in one of the cat beds in the kitchen, They were all over the house for him....and he slept very peacefully for quite a long time.....He kept trying to wash his own legs in the water bowels in this house for a few days. i wanted to do that for him. then I put some drops of lavender oil on his head and neck, as lavender is supposed to have a calming affect.

After his bath, and his long peaceful sleep, he got up and was on the move again...but falling down on his side...and not making it very far......and i stayed with him until 4:30 am......and left him sleeping on one of the cat beds in this room and went upstairs....I wanted to be with him in his last moments, but I started to feel like I was just waiting for him to die....so I left finally.....I knew Spanky did not want to die with me around......

i woke up around 8 am yesterday morning and came back down to check on him....and he was gone...laying stiff by my computer on the blanket with his face pointed towards the chair where I always sit in this room.....

Stan and I buried him around 9 am yesterday. he has the only spot so far near the woods in the front of the house, so I can sit here and look out of the window and out to him..He is facing the house. I know he would have wanted to be buried near the stream most of all...but Irene flooded that stream almost to the this house...Our property was all flooded, but since we are on a hill away from that stream...our house was spared...one of the few around here......i always want higher ground for my house...so i was smart to move here...and Irene knocked out the land bridge and I did not want to bury Spanky where any future hurricanes could possibly unbury his bones.

Anyway, yesterday was very sad here.....all of the animals were quiet, too.....I let the dogs sniff his body before we took him out to bury him. Einstein was the saddest of all.......Minxy cat came with Stan and I and watched the burial.....Spanky was always there for the burying of all of the other pets who have died here and our other pets in the last house, and now Minxy is trying to fill those big shoes and was there for Spanky.....

Finnegan bully cat walked around here late last night looking around in all of the places where Spanly was the last two weeks and crying and meowing...Well, now, Finnegan, you are seniorr pet and now you have been with us the longest....Spanky was and now you are. So be nice to the other two cats, please, like Spanky always was.

Spanky went on his own terms.....We did not segregate him. We gave him freedom of choice to be who he was until the end.

i never saw an animal fight so hard to get better and do all of the right things....and he never cried or meowed the last two weeks.......I did notice an ulcer in his mouth at the end. He died with his ,mouth and eyes opened.....No wonder he would not eat anything at all since we have been back from the Cape and he could not drink much water the last two days here on this earth, either......but I am still glad he went on his own terms, in his house...in his spot....and with all of us naturally.


I miss him so much. His presence here was huge.......a presence that cannot be filled...things will never be the same here again....different, yes, but never the same.

i have to be here for the living still.....and that is what i am doing now.

i have to wonder , too, what is killing my cats with kidney failure? lucky Lou was only 6...he had it...oscar was not that old and now Spanky.......I wondered about the water...but the birds would have been first to go with our drinking water.....The dogs are not getting sick......

Maybe it is pest tech with their poisonous mouse traps. I have to stop that, I think.

i do not want to lose anyone else.

We lost Crusher July 25th due to some prey outside, no doubt......and not two months later Spanky is gone. Crusher did not die from kidney failure, but two big losses like this has been so difficult so close together. i cannot take anymore.right now.

i did get some good news this m orning...with my lab test results...no diabetes,,,,and with all of the pepsi I have always drank? A miracle, for sure......and no high white blood counts....they said everything was perfect for basic blood work ..yay, I guess that is something to celebrate right now, anyway.

 

At work...daydreaming that I'm somewhere else. :/

 

I am a little angry, as with all of the research I have done about cats and kidney failure, it is major consensus that all of the vaccines, especially for distemper can set a cat up for kidney failure a little later.....and we have always gone with whatever vaccines the vets said they needed. I learned....that was wrong with the holistic vet I was seeing for Minxy and her stomatits. She said the same thing, so no more vaccines here.....but..........when we adopted little Grayson...they had already given him 2 distemper shots and neutered him....wrong....you are supposed to wait 6 months before neutering and he was too young for all of the vaccines they gave him ...and he is post due for his 3rd distemper shot now....hmmmm...what am I supposed to do? Not only that, they microchipped Grayson.......and I don't like it........one bit....i would never get an animal micro chipped...and i protested at the time about his so early neutering, and they told me, well, we cannot adopt anyone out until they are neutered......hmmmmmm....so don't tell me it is wrong to take a kitten to be bordered 3 days before we were leaving for our Cape Cod trip...that would make him sick and they could not give him to us, if that was the case...well, i lied and told them I would not go..... It did not make him sick...he got so much attention with everyone at my vet's, and they all loved him...What about what you are doing to little babies too early on...? I would have gotten him neutered when he turned 6 months. pffffft.

 

I've just got out of the bath. Sadly I have no rubber duck.

 

Moon


My sincere condolences for Spanky.
I wish you and Stan comfort moving forward without him.

 

Peter , thank you for always being kind. Spanky was a great cat....the best....he wanted to live......and so many people have been telling me their cats lived to 18......I was hoping the same for Spanky.....but we have to move forward now without him....what other choice is there really?

Thank you so much again.

xoxoxoxoxox

 

I just saw some pics of Spanky

^ I can see why. He was given alot of love and he gave alot too.

 

Laughing at Minxy cat....who has been with us for four years now. I was just looking at her photos when she first came here....skinny as a toothpick....and now she is a little meatier and she may be head cat. She just chased Finnegan off the window sill with a slap to him and he ran away...Finney is not the bully he pretends to be.......and Finney cat always had the softest sweetest meow of all.....Minxy has taken charge here......lol......Grayson is sure the talker......and pretty loud.....

 

Watching Forest Gump on Freeform... first time I think I realized I had this station lol

 

Watching Meatballs ~1979
Recording The Vietnam war ~ 2017

 

Watching Lethal Weapon, the tv series

 

eating linguine

 

Clearly I am sitting here typing! Stupid people! There are are some fairly talented people in this thread.

How I wish I had the talent to make pasta or watch a movie whilst corresponding on Hip Forums

Maybe I need to work on my typing skills and hand/eye co-ordination :guitarist:?

 

i always think the same thing.

right now though i'm wondering about a bot named monday and hopping it isn't bouncing off of me, or using my dns as a vector to ddos, as it seems to be appearing in almost everythread, but not showing up as the last post before mine, even though it is being that, well it doesn't seem to have hit this one yet, so i'll post this and see.

 

it didn't. phew!
that's a relief.

 

Sipping on coffee and reading the forums...