well, i guess i was just told how it is

oh and btw brian..... im down to 10 mills valium a day and .5 ativan.


that is GOOD.

 

See? She's doing better than I even thought. You should all be proud of her. I am.

 

jesus fucking christ woman. You are an ADDICT. Addicts should NOT be planning on reusing after they get clean. It's like an alcoholic saying "once I'm on the wagon, I want to do a couple shots of tequila every month or so." IT'S NOT HEALTHY. THIS PLAN WILL CONTINUE TO FUCK UP YOU AND YOUR LIFE. I don't know why you want to damage yourself so bad, but if you want to continue with it this is a damn good choice

 

i already said ill be fine with just smoking some ganja and maybe eating shrooms EVER.

 

I'm not replying to this, but this has been going on for years... just different products and issues.

Ok sorry Trish. I'm smelling Mudpuddle here.

 

hahaha fuckin mudpuddle. The bitch.

 

she wasnt a bitch, she was confused.

 

confused how? in that you shouldnt be a psychotic, manipulative bitch? er, sorry, psychotic manipulative liar? did i mention i had a bit of a history with her and generally dislike everything she did on the fora? anyway...

i do agree with wariness over internet relationships though, particularly when they will interfere with current real life ones

 

She was a konfoozed bitch. I had no problem with her while she was here, then I found out how fukt up she was toward people, and I didn't like the fact that she basically got Gerri(erzebet) banned.

 

i didnt like mudpuddle at all. and im not confused, jess. when is the last time you talked to me? i went almost three months totally sober, no cigs ...nothing and was doing good...

im DONE defending myself. im doing what i can now with my situation.

and yeah mudpuddle was a liar. i dont lie. im just addicted to something.


im totally done defending myself. this thread was about how dan treated me....not about this shit.

and as for internet relationships.....that pisses me off. dan and me were splitting no matter what.

 

well there is two sides to every story there. ask duck.

 

You talking about me and Trish? I have mentioned this to her too, and she has assured me that I am not the only reason she's wanting to leave her husband, so I'm not really interefering. We actually had a LONG talk about it last night. If she wants to give details, she can, but it's not really my place to give the details about her and Dan.

 

i wanted a divorce anyways. period. for many reasons and i dont feel i need to defend my relationship choices to any of you.

 

I don't guess it's really my business, but I do miss erz.

 

like i said, im really wary about internet relationships where it involves changing the dynamics of another relationship. regardless of "itd happen anyways"'s. it makes me nervous. thena gain, i never liked the concept of leaving one person for another, whether or not the internet was involved. i think alone/single time is necessary for any sort of healing, at least after any relationship that was important in any way. again, this is not specific to you guys, its how i feel about anyone in that sort of a situation

 

you know how this original came to be? we were gonna take things slower but if d moves i can in no way afford this place on my own....we want to be together anyways so if i stay here i need a room mate....we agreed that if things dont work we'll just be friends/room mates....sure, id take alone time if i could but i cant afford to.

and yes, i could get a room mate... in fact we have a few lined up as possibilities BUT if we already want to be together n i need help to keep the place, why not?


you might not agree but to us its right.

 

Damn right

 

erz and mud were both offered to be allowed to post back here again by skip.
they both turned it down.
and yeah im not getting into it cause it's all heresay.

 

exactly.
so im done.

people can say what they think but what i or you do is between us not them. they can give their opinions....but i am no longer gonna defend.

 

*shrugs* it makes me leery when anyone does stuff like that. including my best friend, who is going from relationship to relationship without so much as a breath, let alone true alone/single time. like i said, it doesnt allow for proper healing or closure