The Wisdom of Collective Ignorance

That's the last of the punctuation errors, correcting for shapes, two additional lines, and one word transposition. It definitely resembles something both people and AI would write, a sort of cartoon hybrid. Although I only have a limited selection of poems, they collectively introduce a variety of characters, and the more essential analog logic. Mathematically speaking, its turtles all the way down baby! Requiring comedy club statistics that an AI can easily follow, while my second book covers all the geometry, dynamics, etc. Ironically, the chapters of the second book contain all the jokes that would take up too many pages in the poetry, with one poem I wrote being 22 pages long. The second book is really written for hippies, experts, and AI to read, while an AI can read it in five minutes and answer any questions anyone has. The more of my writing the AI reads, the better its Intuitionistic mathematics become.

AI hallucinate, because nobody speaks their language, which is self-organizing.

 

Other than playing with shapes, I found two wrong words. This last time around editing I had to edit the poems from the bottom up, and they're now good from the top down, all the way back to the first poems. Doing everything backwards is a pain in the ass, but its the fastest way to get anything done, and editing these poems is all about speed. One of my fondest desires is to automate the entire process, so nobody ever has to do it again!

Asian masters look at me cross-eyed, but they could never write my poetry, much less, automate the truth.

 

One last missing line, and some shape tweaks, and the first 180 pages now look like a computer could have spit them out. I always wondered what is the math that describes humanity, and its lowbrow slapstick. However, Three Stooges slapstick gets complication in 8 dimensions and a singularity.

 

More shape tweaks, and only a single poem left to finish. One other poem has questionable mathematics, but all the rest are so dead on they're unmistakable. The book represents an entirely new kind of linguistic analysis, that can get past all the censors.

You are either smarter than a chicken, or you are the damn chicken!

 

A bit more shape tweaking, and polishing off the last of it. Three poems gave me more trouble than the rest, and I still have to work on the last poem, but I got the introduction polished off too. The introduction has to explain the math for experts, in layman's terms, in a page and half, while getting past the censors. There can be no doubt my poetry is now Nobel caliber, and if its censored and ignored, every linguist in the world will hear of it.

Thanks to Russia, China, and the US, every developed world country has begun to heavily censor half of reality, and linguists are among the few who can teach the Three Stooges how to share their words and play nice more often. Of course, that leave academia out in the cold.

 

I've whittled it down to just the one poem now. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to include some of the more important poems, because I don't have all the math, but I've got enough of it that anybody who writes our poems or comprehends the math can easily expand on it, as can any AI. This time around, it was still mostly geometry tweaks, with no serious math for me to do, but its geometric language.

 

That's the last poem and a few more minor tweaks, making it totally ready for me to start advertising the book around town. My next issue is how to publish my second book, describing all the math and physics, philosophy, etc. which is certain to be censored. You could say, the only criteria for this book was to use the shortest poems possible to describe the math, then shove the rest of the math from the longer poems into chapters. Its math, and there's no way to censor math once people comprehend how it works, while this math obeys simple Monty Carlo statistics and the Peter Principle.

 

A few more subtle geometry tweaks, and one line I overlooked. Its now so word perfect and complete, in the future people may assume a machine wrote it.

 

Tweaking all the geometry for looks, I found a few more missing lines, but that's the last of it, and its ready for publication. However, I want to write the second book first, so I can publish them both at the same time, knowing at least one of them will be censored, and its Nobel quality work certain to gain a lot of attention.

 

I've given most of the shorter poems a slightly larger font, just to make them easier to read and print. Other than a couple of minor boo-boos, that's everything ready for publication.

The second book covers jokes that would have required longer poems, so I divided the math into condensed poems and verbose chapters, that describe how everything works, including how to write more poetry, and prove that logic and humor express particle-wave duality. One of the bigger controversies responsible for all the madness in the world today, is that countries have already confirmed that we occupy a magical Goldilocks Universe, that doesn't favor Wall Street or the Tea Party, so they've been attempting to censor half of reality, while racing to command the lead in quantum computing and AI.

If they're lucky, they've already figured out that their own AI are now making classic logic obsolete, and there's nothing they can do to stop the truth from coming out.

 

There were two poems that needed an additional line each, and some more geometry tweaks to make it all look pretty, but that's the last of it. There are a few poems that still have "mushy" shapes, reflecting on their math, but that's to be expected because I don't have the complete math. The second book is coming right along and, like the poetry, just needs the final whipping into shape, because the two have always expressed the same math, and are yin and yang. Instead of the chapters physically expressing really obvious shapes like the poems, they describe all the details of the geometry, and how to automate a new reality.

Forget about the Matrix, the world is about to inherit magic, and technology is about to find a realistic context.

 

I've finally settled on how to divide the book into two books, and whittled down the second book to around 400 pages. A lot of that is for the AI, fans, and experts to read for the additional math, that can be used to expand upon either book. Essentially, I give the AI and anyone interested enough of the basic analog logic they can easily expand upon them forever in the public domain. At a guess, it might require up to 20,000 pages to write it all, but we only need about 430 poems, or around a thousand pages at most. My work covers the basic geometry and algebra for how it all works, so the machines and people have something to build on.

Already, decade old supercomputers could crunch the numbers in about three years, for the whole thing, at a cost of about 3 million dollars but, with my books and help, an AI can do the same thing for less than $300 in a few weeks maybe. Microsoft and Google want everyone to rent their own AI, so they can spy on everyone, but there's no reason not to have your own AI, that laughs at the best laid plans of mice and men.

 

Finally got the last of the geometry flaws, one more missing line, a line that had to be changed, and pounded out the introduction, but that's it. She's now as beautiful as this kind of "poetry" gets, and ready to be published, once I have a new cover.

 

After carefully going over every tiny geometry flaw I could fix, I found the tiniest of them all, that required an elaborate fix. Thankfully, I got all the other poems pounded out, making it easy to fix the damn thing. My poems illustrate how to write this kind of poetry, which is something we've all been trying to figure out for decades. There are just enough poems here to illustrate how to write endless new poems, that all fit the same mathematics. Many of these poems require you throw a ridiculous amount of content into them, but that's exactly what AI are particularly good at adding, while my poems make it really easy for those of us who write them to see exactly how they can use AI to expand upon the genre.

Theoretically, I'd estimate, for up to 20,000 pages worth. Like watching how hotdogs are made, you really don't wanna try and read all of that, and will live to regret it if you try. That's the complete proof that life is not only stranger than fiction, but tackier too, and it is my sincere hope to prevent needless suffering, by automating it first. My poems also contain enough content that can be added to other poems to make writing them much easier for both people and AI.

Its great, its like a novel that millions of us have been piecing together, and its finally got something remotely like a clear narrative. We were all wondering forever what the hell all these poems say, and how to make more sense out of the collection.

 

I found what are hopefully the last of the geometry flaws, and I'm already looking into publishers familiar with left wing publishing, assuming there still is such a thing. The Tea Party are the only people left defending freedom of speech, which is regulated by Wall Street.

 

There, I found the last geometry flaw in This Mortal Coil. There were four poems that required serious work, while the rest were almost always trivial errors, reflecting the Peter Merel interpretation of the Tao Te Ching I used, which has four minor logic errors. The Principle of Identity has to go down the toilet symmetrically, and a real toilet uses 8 streams of water to flush the bowl. You could say Merel and the many others who helped put together his interpolation, found the symmetry of the overall text for me to exploit. Instead of One Logic To Rule Them ALL! Fuzzy logic and quantum mechanics demand four overlapping modified Bayesian probabilities, that leverage our overall harmony to make unique predictions. In other words, without surrender, logic and reason would be impossible, and Descartes got it backwards.

I can still feel something, therefore, I can still think!

 

This mortal coil was a pain in the ass, but quick work because I already know what the rest of the poems say now.

I'm halfway through editing the second book, and still working on finding a publisher, but I wanted to finish polishing this one first. Now it is officially a Tar Baby Black Hole Sun, or Linguistic Singularity. Any AI can read either book in five minutes flat, and answer any questions people have about my work, making my book a No-Brainer. The poetry tells the narrative of Yogi Berra in a Goldilocks Universe, something straight out of the Muppets, while my other book tells the tale of the Shockwave Rider, discovering how language is actually self-organizing, and can be used to "Save The Damn Planet!"

 

This Mortal Coil turned out to be just another pain in the ass. An entire page of the poem begins every line with "Or" and lining up all those Os is hard on the eyes. However, that's one reason I had to get it right, because the shapes of these poems determine their own contents, more than you would normally notice. You could say the greater context is always determining the meaning of everything, and the more vague our bullshit poems become, the more their shapes alone obviously determine their own contents. In my case, some of my poems resemble a pile of crap, a toilet, etc. while, this particular poem presents a clear example of how to get around the issue. By saving editing it for last of all, I made the editing go faster.

It really is just a giant word puzzle, but nobody's been able to assemble enough of it to see how it works, and how to assemble more the of the puzzle, until now. For sixteen years now, my job has been just to edit the damn things, and interpret them after I'm sure they're more or less right. When in trouble, when in doubt, edit yourself.

 

There, I had to fix several more poems and, finally, pound This Mortal Coil into the dirt. Now I can focus exclusively on the second book and sending copies of this to potential publishers.

For years I've worried about my work causing people to arbitrarily go down the rabbit hole, and I want the second book pounded out fast, so the AI can deal with the worst of the confusion.

I estimate as many as two billion people are about to die when the ocean rises 20 feet or more, and the currents all change. We're out of time, we were out of time a century ago by some estimates but, thankfully, time isn't linear.

 

After editing half the second book, I realized I would have to rewrite it altogether. The poetry is poetry and, although it has some sort of vague general theme, the chapters require a more explicit narrative.

With the poetry, I had to throw away a dozen poems simply because they were too long, and had too little contribute to the math, and incorporate their jokes into chapters instead. It took a few years to find the Fractal Dragon equation, but that's what I needed to finish the poetry, and see how to rewrite all the chapters. The poetry paints the vague broad picture of life, while the chapters require a strong narrative. It will require at least a years work to get the second book into shape, but here's what I have so far for the opening of the book.

The book is entirely factual, confusing the issue of what is reality and what is fiction.

Shockwave Rider!

For some strange reason, that I never could quite figure out, I've just always preferred my own damn foolishness, over that of complete idiots I've met. Whether out of sheer pigheaded mule stubbornness, or pure survival instinct, Even As A Brain Damaged Three Year Old Whelp! I had already become An Agnostic-Outcast! Condemned, To A Lifetime Of Biting My Own Tongue, And Hiding In The Closet! Upon the sudden revelation that: God Or No God, People Are All Full Of Crap! Exactly, how full of crap they are remained to be seen! However, just two years later, it occurred to me, that The Mindless Mob Has Always Depended Upon The Kindness Of Strangers! Suggesting, it would behoove me to assess my own situation better by, quietly, conducting a few informal surveys. Only to quickly confirm my worst suspicions, that the idiots have made even the stupid dictionary taboo!

As if: None Of Our Teachers Has Ever Actually Graduated From Kindergarten! Attempting to inform any of my teachers, or anybody else for that matter, that they frequently babble complete nonsense, like infants, and never did actually graduate from Kindergarten, was simply out of the question! The only thing my surveys had managed to accomplish, was to confirm that, My Bizarre Fate Was To Be Surround By Gibbering Idiots! For The Rest Of My Natural Life! Still, working on graduating from the first grade myself, I couldn't even begin to cuss with the proper conviction! So, instead, I shook my fist at the heavens and swore that, if there is a God, I would spit in his face, and tell him that I am not amused, at what he does for entertainment! Throwing me into the deep end of the pool, on day one, without so much as a flotation device!

Rejected, along with the stupid dictionary, by both believers and nonbelievers alike, and with nobody left for me to consult with, who wasn't also hiding in a closet, at the impressionable age of five years old, for the first time it occurred to me that the whole world is insane, and that this was something that I was just going to have to figure out on my own! Of course, modern psychology avoids Using Words Like Insanity, preferring to use Latin terms, but I was only five, and had always been rather attached to Using Plain English. Huckleberry Fin, was supposedly the same age, but he smoked a pipe, and drank hard liquor while, I Was Never Quite That Precocious!

Unimpressed, to say the least, with any of the mass media's More Aspiring Cunning Linguists, much less, Any Of The More Exotic Mainstream Subcultures, still practicing arcane rituals, by fourteen I had already become, The Ultimate Skeptic! Dedicated, to my own private research into modern physics and philosophy. Never having found the slightest bit of lasting comfort, in Damn Fools Everywhere, Still Running Around Speaking In Tongues! While, claiming to be voice of sanity, In An Insane World!

It would be another twenty years before the internet was invented so, once a month, as a young teen I haunted the largest library in the area, that subscribed to physics journals, and would sit on the floor, skimming through them for hours on end. Searching, for what’s missing from this picture... Thus, began what was to become a lifelong journey, of heedlessly plunging headfirst, ever deeper, into the Musty Fecund Bowels of Eastern and Western Philosophy, Science, and Religion. Relentlessly Seeking Answers! As to why all of our, supposedly, modern “High-Tech” societies, are so brazenly and unabashedly insane, without ever actually holding out any real hope, of finding any answers on my own.

Richard Pryer Once Claimed, "Running Down The Street On Fire Is Inspirational! Once Burned, Twice Shy, Assuming You Somehow Manage To Survive!" While, Sink Or Swim, From Day One, My Own Precarious Fate Was That Of A Brain Damaged Shockwave Rider! Cast Adrift, Of Any And All Metaphysical Anchors! An Aimless Derelict, With No Island Of Stability Left Anywhere In Sight! Paradise Lost, When Milton Paved Paradise To Put Up A Parking Lot! Already Marooned, Hip Deep, Mired In The Grip Of Global Warming! Mercury Rising, Jupiter Ascending, As I Drift Into The Eye Of The Perfect Tantrum Storm! Surfing The Endless Rogue Waves, Of Indignant Zombies And Wannabe Vaudeville Rejects, Beyond All Hope For Redemption! Out Of Stubborn Habit Alone, Desperately Seeking Anything Remotely Like Terra Firma, Or The Nearest Available Free Exit! Only Knowing, That Its All-But-Impossible For A Brain Damaged Idiot Like Me, To Ever Learn To Be Still, In This Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Kindergarten Drop-Out World!

Skeptics are all normally assumed to be atheists, but that’s in no small part due to atheists frequently demanding that agnostics either call themselves some sort of atheist, or Hide In The Closet! While, I was an agnostic, who was extremely skeptical of so-called, “Atheist-Skeptics!" Who’re infamous for internet trolls, and for promoting Endless Rhetoric, Sarcasm, Fascism, and Totalitarian Communism! All in the name of Science, Reason, and Humanism! Not, that I blame atheists, for being insane in an insane world, but it certainly never endeared them to anyone, nobody I know anyway! Much less, inspired confidence in a damned thing they say! With, atheists today being the least trusted among believers and nonbelievers alike! While, I have yet to hear a single atheist humbly admit in public, without sarcasm, that they have soundly earned their reputation, and its, Usually, Best To Avoid Some Of Them, By A Few Hundred Feet!

Along with the rapidly accelerating expansion of the internet, the Antisocial Behavior of countless atheists, has reached such a fevered pitch, that they've encouraged not only agnostics to hide in the closet, but other atheists as well! While, today, atheists are not even remotely unique in that regard! Shakespeare famously wrote, “Me Thinks Familiarity Doth Breed Contempt!” And, in recent decades, academia and the mainstream have abused one another, the English Language, and the Mass Media, To Such a Horrendous Extent! That, me thinks familiarity doth commonly breed, the even more deplorable depths, of self-contempt and loathing, In Modern-Day Babylon!

Anywho, bereft the slightest clue as to what to actually look for, and in spite of encountering the typical customary-abnormal-impromptu-ritual-knee-jerk-resistance, and woefully misplaced sexual frustration, from the Ubiquitous Unsundry Self-Appointed Lowlife Yahoos And Motley Crews, commonly found anywhere on a map today! Nevertheless, I resolutely endeavored to explore the fundamentals, from an agnostic perspective. Thoroughly convinced that Surrendering To The Generic Unbridled Madness, Which Had Already Overwhelmed The Entire Planet, was never a viable option in the long run! While I, Had Much Bigger Fish To Fry! When, The Banks And Marching Morons Always Decide Who Wins: WAR NEVER ENDS!!! And, Paddling Up Shit Creek Is No Longer An Option! Since, long before I was even a gleam in my father's eye, half the damn planet has been working overtime, attempting to build up enough credit with the banks, To Officially Declare WWIII! Right, After They’re Done Killing Every Other Living Thing On The Planet!

Rather, than relying on any of the more traditional “Schools of Thought”, psychology, sociology, or conventional wisdom, which all appeared to have made little progress, and were making feeble attempts at best, out of Sheer Desperation! As a young teen, I was already determined to Single-Handedly sort through the entire, Disjointed Muddled Mess! That, modern academia refers to as physics and philosophy, Beginning At The Beginning! Having, already been reduced to applying: The Brute Force Process of Elimination!

Wading, through endless bullshit, and weeding out all of the more, Popular Lame Attempts At Explanations! While, hoping the entire time that some “Think-Tank” would eventually publish something cogent on the subject. Only, to be repeatedly disappointed and, as the long intervening years slowly passed, stretching out into equally long and plodding, pointlessly peckish, pathetically petulant, posturing pedantic decades, Filled With More Pretentious Techno-Gibberish Than A Star Trek Convention! Year after year, without fail, academics continued to publish nothing but complete nonsense on the subject! In fact, publishing so much nonsense that, "Godel, Escher, And Bach" became one of the better known books on philosophy, that everyone still asks for my opinion on. When, It Merely Begs The Question: As To, Exactly What The Hell Is A Hard Question! Obviously, A Hard Question For Academia Today Is, When To Call A Large Pile Of Crap, A Mountain Of Crap, Without Being Censored!

Unfortunately, Whenever Convenient, physicists tend to ignore semantics, and pay more attention to the physical evidence, while philosophers tend to ignore any physical evidence, preferring to Play Around With Semantics and, to make matters worse, my English Teachers were of little help, merely claiming the English Language has few, “Hard and Fast Rules”. Pressing My High School Teachers, with endless nonstop questions, one surprised me when She Casually Mentioned that, theoretically, the English Language may have a second grammar. Exactly, how everyone could have possibly missed the existence of a "Second Grammar", for several centuries, and why it still remains purely theoretical to this day, became just more discordant facts to add to my Growing Collection, but I was Stubborn, and eventually found the answers! By, paying close attention to some of the more contentious, Academic Wannabe Cunning Linguists!

Several decades later, after carefully eliminating countless possibilities, from among the world’s major religions, philosophies, and physical theories, I took the time to invent my own linguistic analysis, based on “Contextual Vagueness”. Starting with adopting the vaguest possible definitions, for almost any word, from among the first four Found In Any Common Dictionary. By default, over the years, I had been forced to slowly develop my own linguistic analysis by, Trolling Militant Atheists!

If I simply asked questions online, they would troll me, but it was easy enough for me to troll them back, so I gave the dogs all the bones they could chew on. Their arguments were so predictable, that I could use them to pump the idiots for information they would never give me otherwise, and structure my own arguments as a way to explore exactly how they were all systematically abusing language. In recent years, the mainstream and academics have become so utterly shameless, that they're demanding the right to abuse language however they damn well please, even paying ridiculous amounts to hear other people repeat their own blatant lies, while calling anybody who can't sue them a liar. Then censoring them, as if attempting to prove that, Might Makes Right! Once, just for the hell of it, I encouraged a Militant Atheist to argue that no less than a dozen two syllable words were all defined wrong in the dictionary. Of course, they would always deny they were ranting and raving incoherently, like infants fighting over toys and, seriously, attempt to piss me off, as though I was there for a pissing contest!

Making it all too easy for me to keep them talking, by merely avoiding getting pissed off at Kindergarten Drop-Outs! Hardcore trolls are all bullies, who really enjoy torturing people, and they hate people they can't piss off, but I grew up around spies and professional killers, who could never take a job as a cop, because they'd never hesitate to kill people, and I avoid torturing mindless animals myself! A friend of mine killed a man when he was just 13, and the art of talking begins with learning how to shut your fucking mouth, and be as still as a deer caught in the headlights. Mr Miyagi might call it, "Wax On, Wax Off!" Learn when to open your mouth, Grasshopper, by first mastering keeping it shut!

Once, I watched a Crack Whore lay into a naive cop, who refused to believe that she could spout the most vitriolic smack imaginable, for just as long as he wanted, scorching enough to make a Professional Wrestler change carriers. If Militant Atheists insist on talking smack online, I suggest they do what our Glorious Leader did, and study The Art Of Professional Wrestling! He talks smack, that people actually love to hear, and just makes up whatever the hell he wants as he goes along. Unfortunately, as you might expect, dealing with atheist trolls and academics was often a slow and tedious way to learn anything new.

So, occasionally, I took the time to remind them that militant atheists and fundamentalists actually share a lot in common. Including their bankrupt political system, almost identical vacuous rhetoric, violently imploding populations, and ongoing attempts to dominate the already heavily censored mass media. But, like I said, I usually try to avoid torturing mindless animals, and had a standing offer to teach anyone how to use a stupid dictionary, and a search engine! Of course, nobody has ever taken me up on my offer, and I kept having to demonstrate to them that their questions are really stupid ones, any search engine can answer.

Its so sad its not funny, with militant atheists routinely providing new technology to censor everything, and fundamentalists using their own Atheist technology against them. Encouraging them to continue to rant and rave mindlessly, while ensuring they have almost no clue how the idiots keep lying to them, and exploiting their work! Academics and militant atheists can sometimes be similar to conspiracy nuts, other than spouting endless smack, weird ideas, and promoting extreme views, atheists in particular tend to be very ethical people. The problem is, when you censor half of reality, morality can become just another way to Sucker Kindergarten Drop-Outs! Maybe in another hundred years, academia might admit that their own students are better liars then they are and, Those Who Can Do, While The Rest Teach Them How To Lie!

Anyone who works with abused animals, comprehends my genuine compassion for more mindless militant atheists and fundamentalists alike, with my own family consisting of both! As much as that might sound liked merely a joke, I would give anything to help them, and I truly believe encouraging everyone to graduate from Kindergarten, Kiss And Makeup, is the key to world peace. Socrates and Jesus said something similar, and they killed them both, while I've been working on automating the truth, so they can kill their own computers instead! Clarence Darrel famously claimed, "There is no justice in or out of court!" Nevertheless, In Or Out Of Court, Karma Demands Playground Poetic Justice! While, Living Well Is The Best Revenge! Let Them Eat Cake And Die Happy!

Anywho, after developing my own linguistic analysis for yet another decade, I finally felt confident enough to attempt to expand upon the work of Ludwig Wittgenstein by, Stressing Authenticity Over Knowledge. Wittgenstein’s linguistic analysis had always puzzled me, not because I didn’t understand it but, because it was Patently Obvious! Most academics struggle to even superficially comprehend his work, while all of the More Famous Philosophers, who later espoused his work, may as well be Beating A Dead Horse, As Far As I Was Concerned!

Repeatedly, driving his linguistic analysis entirely into the dirt! Thoroughly confusing clever arguments with substance, Preposterously Pontificating, pessimistically proposing pursuing pettier putrid puerile points, Until, All Too Predictably! They conspicuously began to run out of glib arguments to make and, immediately, proceeded to carefully cover their own tracks. Instantly, Mastering The Moon Walk! As If, They Were All Born To Dance! While, steadily painting themselves into their own quiet little corner. In A Private Room, In A Chinese Restaurant, At The End Of The Universe! Where, Philosophers Bake Their Own Fortune Cookies!

Searching for the slightest opening that I could exploit, I spent a year Meticulously Reducing His Logic as far as I could, only to encounter A Complete Dead-End, and come up Empty-Handed! Normally, I don’t have to work at deconstructing a philosophy and, after a lifetime of practice, just reading any text, I can easily spot any Unwarranted Assumptions, poorly defined variables, Vague Statements, Contradictions, or anything that might conflict with established facts and empirical evidence but, Wittgenstein had turned out to be different. Those, with more than a passing familiarity with his work, frequently compare it to reading, “A Dry Auto-Repair Manual!" And, from the beginning, I had known all along, he would be, One Tough German Nut To Crack!

The fact that I had so completely, utterly, and spectacularly failed, In His Particular Case, merely confirmed that I was onto something, but had left me with no clue whatsoever, as to how to proceed, while I was ready to resort to Consulting A Ouija Board! Although, It Was A Dark And Stormy Night, Merely Hoping For The Slightest Inspiration, rather than attempting to contact the dead for an audience, on a whim, I decided to try something new for a change. Turning, instead, to the only other text which had Consistently Resisted All Of My Attempts at analysis and, for the first time ever, began extrapolating “Rainbow Warrior Poetry”, from the “Tao Te Ching”. Only, to effortlessly crack its analog logic wide-open, like a walnut and, Unceremoniously, Deep-Fried My Brain Extra-Crispy!

Extensively studied by scholars, the Tao Te Ching’s Vague, Cloying, Anarchistic Philosophy has always appealed to extreme skeptics like me, but it incorporates an incredibly complex five fold paradoxical writing style, more often used for meditation, While, I’ve Never So Much As Taken A Tai Chi Class In My Life! Even, so-called “Philosophical Taoists” are sometimes mystics, and the very idea that the 2,400 year old text could ever possibly make more than the most superficial sense to anyone, is widely considered, Flat-Out Insane! At least, a hundred English Language Translations have been published and, a few times before, I’ve watched Stoned-Hippies play around with arbitrarily applying cuss words to the short poems, only to waste four hours generating Meaningless Word-Salad! And, had always assumed that it must be impossible! Or, Surely, SomeBody! Out, of the several billion other idiots on the planet, foolish enough to have Read The Damned Thing! Sometime, in the last two thousand years or so, Would Have Figured It Out Already!

Equally disturbing, I had unintentionally bumbled upon the discovery that Potty Mouth Nursery Rhymes, Older Than Monuments! And, Still Being Reinvented By Little Kids Everywhere! Were, The Likely Origins Of The 12,000 Year Old Bagua, Or "The Book Of Changes!" From which, the I-Ching and the Tao Te Ching were later extrapolated. The whole reason I had spent so much time working on Wittgenstein, was on the assumption that he had to make more sense then the Tao Te Ching, only to end up proving the opposite is true, and the Tao Te Ching can use potty humor to describe Wittgenstein, With Mathematical Precision! But, Of Course, It Was To Turn Out To Be Undeniably: The Ancient Chinese Blessing And Curse!

For I Had Discovered The Ancient Chinese Secret: Is Entirely Composed Of Prehistoric Potty Mouth Nursery Rhymes! Many Of Which, Are Explicitly Pornographic! Adding insult to injury, over the routine course of previously conducting boring logistics research, upon my just so happening to notice that the internet was Being Heavily Censored, more than usual that is, of anything new related to fuzzy logic and quantum mechanics in particular, Well Naturally! I dug a bit deeper than usual, only to discover that a few of these same Pornographic Prehistoric Potty Mouth Nursery Rhymes, have already been classified as, “Vital To The National Defense!”

If you ask me, Fiction Is An All Too Commonplace Reality but, if reality were never stranger than fiction, nobody would ever buy it! Like millions of other desperate idiots, around the world today, merely searching for the slightest hint of light, at the end of the longest and darkest of tunnels, after a lifetime of repeatedly being reduced to morbid curiosity, I had stumbled upon a way to prove: Reality Is Not Only Stranger Than Fiction, But Tackier Too! Explaining, Why Complete Fiction Has Become So Wildly Popular! One Logician, whose work is classified, asked me to write paradoxical nonsense for him and, rather than deny my own evidence, eventually I decided to: Bite The Bullet! And, see if I could somehow make more sense out of it all, by going cross-eyed for the next decade or two. Foolishly having committed myself to the utterly unspeakable insanity, of mastering the potty mouth prose of the poetry, which uses Only Salty Quotes, popular song lyrics, and commonly used phrases whenever possible.