Put a sock over it and make a Muppet show. Experimental penis enlargement techniques. STD taxi. Bird feeder. Clay Aikens new dick in a box. Lamp club.
I saw that the second I hit the "Post Thread" button. I was pissed. Lab Rat Steering Aid Baby Seal Club Pull Up Bar Q-Tip Carry on....
well then you should have edited....there is a very small window of time where you CAN edit the thread title
A distraction while robbing a bank, no one would be able to describe your face... Donut holder so you can carry two cups of coffee. Something to play with during a power outage.
Towel rack Toy microphone (testing one, two...) Scale model blimp or submarine Prop for comedy routine Hymen removal tool
That's the best suggestion I've seen yet. I'd also like to point out that the responses to this thread clearly mark my cock as more practically useful than fat people.