the hotbox (convo thread)

You guys have it all wrong about women. It's really, really simple. Follow these fool-proof steps:

Step 1: Asshole
>>> Show off in front of them, be a badass, be annoying, overdose, drink, beat up people, jump out of windows, whatever. Be really annoying, be a jerk, but be mysterious. Ladies love mystery because it makes them believe that they can SOME HOW change you from your dangerous ways.
Step 2: Vunerability:
>>> Let this girl know that you are a badass, but you have a soft spot in your heart and she brings that out in you, even if she really doesn't. This can be acheived by doing many activities that make girls "melt". Likkke, talking about your grandparents, showing her how much you love kids/ the environment/ whatever. Buying her flowers or bringing her food when she;s sick.
Step 3: Ignore her for a while
>>> It will drive her insane. This is risky, but usually if you time it right, when you stop ignoring her, she will not be able to get enough of you. Tell her your busy, tell her your grandma is dying, or simply dont return her calls. This period needs to not last to the extent that you piss her off though, make not of how often she contacts YOU during this period and don't wait very long after she stops contacting you to reconnect.
Step 4: Sex
>>> After you start paying attention to her again, and she still shows interest, make a move. She will likely agree because she doesn't want you to start ignoring her again and OF COURSE, in the mind of a woman, sex will keep you around.

WORKS. EVERY. TIME. Of course, I am a woman and I have tried this on other women with success so it's kinda different, but I'm assuming it works with male/ female relationships too.

 

idk about the whole asshole thing with this chick. She's the nicest sweetest person I know. Its hard to be an asshole around her. I am really good at being an asshole though. Fuck it, I'll give it a shot.

 

Well of course, this doesn't apply to all woman. For example, if a woman or man tried this steps on me, I would most likely ignore them in stage 1 haha. But for a good portion of women, these rules will work. And by work, I mean get you laid, not get a girlfriend.

 

I'm working on either. Preferably the latter. but meh. anyway. I'm out for a bit to go play some music and drink the devils drink. peace ya'll

 

Thirsty Thursday anyone?

 

So today, my friend's 6 year old daughter made me laugh so hard i cried.
here's the convo(she must have got it from one of her brothers!)

DAD: Did you do you spelling words?
Daughter: Yes, they're done
dad: are you sure they are all done?
daughter: leave me alone....you're gay.
dad: i'm gay? no you're gay.
daughter: well....well....well you sucked the dog's balls!

suffice to say i was WEAK

 

I would end up being the administrator of the club. things are so rocky right now with my girlfriend. i can't even have a converation with her. idk what to do...

 

Yes. Drunken VP debate. AKA getting shitty and turned on by miss Sarah Palin

 

women are easy. just tell them they are right all the time. only argue over something that is majorly important to the future, if they win a bunch of little battles they feel special. sorry if that comes off as sexist but it is what it is.

 

We (my roomates and I) are playing a drinking game where we drink everytime Palin says "Gosh" "Heck" or "Maverick". In conclusion, I'm going to get shithoused. The end, thank you American politics.

 

not everyone has the sex appeal of you my gal

 

Am I the only one watching the debate? Sarah Palin just said "Drill, baby, drill". And then said "drilling" a bunch more. I want to drill her. So sexy.

 

she makes my head hurt.

 

That's why you just turn the sound off the and just look at her and she'll make your pants hurt. K, that doesn't make much sense but I cannot think of a better analogy at this time.

 

she does make my crotch hurt, only because she causes my cock to shrivel inside of me. I feel if i have to look at her for four years my penis will die

 

lol make your pants hurt

Anyhoo just smoked an afterwork bowl and am about to do some lovely french homework

 

Honestly? Does that just happen because you know she's an idiot? Like, if you saw her walking down the street, didn't know who she was, wouldn't you totally check her out? I would. I definitely would. Several times. And probably yell "dammmmnn girrrllll".

 

I have a write to critique on Dr. Seuss's use of satire in his children's book the Butter Battle.

 

LOL butter batlle wtf

 

awesome assignment I love learning like that.

Bailey, I find nothing about her to be physically attractive. her mental inaptitude doesn't help my opinion. Now if she were to read me a book that I picked, she could speak all night long because I love her accent