Suicidal factoid

Peoples behavior toward you doesn't change the value of your generosity toward them. The money is transient. If you look within yourself and see that facet that enabled you to generously help out friends and family you'll have something to be satisfied about. You're just wiser now- you know to be more selective about who to help and more importantly that money doesn't guarantee happiness.

Feel compassion for the people who are incapable or unwilling to appreciate your generous spirit. That should affect who you are and how you feel about yourself.

 

Money has no value to me.the world is a lonely place without love.

 

True... and that starts with yourself.

 

Don't know if you intentionally used the word 'nihillist', but i found it funny seeing as you have a 'big lebowski' pic in your sig, haha!

 

I guess my consciousness is wilfully and deliberately controlling the production of 300 billion body cells everyday while meticulously and telekinetically causing extremely minute damage and deteriorations with every tedious replication.

Jesus fucking Christ!
No wonder I'm so mentally fucking exhausted!

 

Unfortunately these days it starts with money.someday people will realize money may buy you friends and lovers but it will never buy happiness and real love

 

Friends and lovers who need to be bought aren't really your friends or lovers and are a waste of money... but you do seem to get that which means as painful as your experience has been you're a better person and wiser for having gone through it.

I've had to do a wholesale re-assessment of my own values and I've come to appreciate the learning and growing experiences that some of the worst experiences I've experienced have turned out to be. Before getting bitch-slapped by life I apparently had an attitude very similar to the type I've long loathed. Self loathing is an ugly thing.

What commits suicide is innocence and a naive nature. Life struggles make people more interesting to be around... they can tell stories that are as real as can be. You appear to be one of those people.

 

Ive seen, done, had, heard and lived through alot of things that most people should be happy they didn't.it haunts me every day.there is no fixing it.ive tried so many meds that I gave up trying.nothing worked.most meds made it worse.and im honestly tired of dealing with it.

 

nothing left to do but smile smile smile...

 

That's when people need to worry.me smiling means somebody is about to get fucked up bad