still tripping randomly?

Timothy Leary, Terence Mckenna, Anton Wilson anyone from a strong psychadellic background, and only psychadellic, stayed with it, stayed highly aware and intelligent till the day they died.

However... go look at people whos drug of choice was alcohol through their life. Such people can hardly even speak whole sentences on their death beds.

I would certainly rather take a bunch of LSD, get all aspects of my persona and how to operate on earth nailed down hard. So then I can run out my time on earth in a perfected state, never changing and highly concious/aware till the day I die. Instead of slowly numbing myself out of existence like what most people do.

And didn't you say you didn't even do LSD? Why are you then saying your 'speaking from experience' on an acid forum? That makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. I think you should try some LSD, it really helped me make sense of alot of things.

Reminds me of something McKenna said--
"LSD is a psychedellic substance that occasionally causes psychotic behavior in those who have not taken it."

 

^^^ goood point

whatshappenin23 - what was the drug that 'brought on' the mental health problems?

 

3xi,
probably ecstasy...

RYgoody...You are correct I am not directly aware of the effects of LSD, but as an outside observer...You are chasing a "perfected state" (which by the way, is impossible to achieve but anyway...) by means of a man made substance. Sounds like you are very enlightened indeed!

My point is this. You say I should try LSD. You do not know me one bit. How could you possibly reccomend that to me? I guarantee the shit would not be good for me. I would probably be institutionalized. fuck that. You do what you want to do, but Im saying you should not be reccomending the use of hard psychadelics to people you do not even know (you are assuming that everyones experiences will be like yours, like a child does) especially when many of them are minors. Im not out to convince you to stop in your persuit of perfection, even though I know that is not a healthy goal. I just want younger people to know that despite how "enlightened" someone like you may claim to be, not to just trust whatever shit you spit out.

 

He can recommend and believe whatever he wants. You don't have to listen to his advice. If you are taking drugs then it is your responsibility to make an informed choice. People shouldnt make decisions for you.

 

There is no point to pursue a perfected state because we are all born into a perfect state! I suppose LSD helps many of us realize that. I could see it doing the opposite as well. The way I see it I am perfect, but not any more or less then all of you or anyone/anything else in this world.

 

I feel you. fuck let me just apologize for all the stupid shit ive said. really though, I just have problems in my life, but I guess who doesn't huh? I don't understand whats in your head any more than you understand whats in mine. hell i don't even understand whats in mine. I guess what Im saying is Im sorry if I was offensive to anyone.

and Alaxsxa you are absolutely right..Sometimes I think that some people (me) can be persuaded to easily, so we have to keep a guard up. What Im starting to accept is that my life has not gone the way I invisioned it would. Maybe I want to have something to blame, and drugs is an easy cop out. But with the attitude Ive been holding onto recently, Im more bitter than anything. I just want to be happy and at peace. I want the same for all of you. Make good choices thats all Im saying.

Nothing but love for all you people.

 

We are all the same but each unique. A problem isn't a problem unless you identify it as one. That's why you can see so many "problems" in others while they haven't the slightest clue.
I can relate to what your saying because I have been there. You must learn to question everything, at least thats what I did. It got to the point where everything I thought I knew about the world and myself was destroyed. I was EXTREMELY bitter, alone, and depressed. It comes down to letting go and not knowing. Letting go can be a tough thing. I have done a complete 180. I have learned to fill myself with love. Even if I see someone that I think is wrong and bad, the only thing I can do is understand that they don't understand. I must do my best to send them all the love I can, to hopefully help them understand. It can't be some fake kind of love either. You really have to feel it, unconditional selfless love. Thank god or yourself or just thank the fact that you are here alive and breathing and (hopefully) healthy. Learning to appreciate the little things that many don't have the opportunity to.
I do my best not to place judgment on others because it is pointless to. It only makes me look worse. I learned ALOT from reading books. If you are interested I can share some titles with you! Okay now I will stop rambling on, I don't mean to preach just tryin to help!

 

soothslayer,

I'm always interested in hearing some good books to read.

 

whatshappenin, judging from the internet, you seem like a pretty stable person in what you say. what exactly is your "problem"?

 

I shower I dont even want to tell you how many times a day. I repeat unecessary things over and over again. I have extreme social anxiety at times. I have a lot of irrational fears. I worry about horrible things happening to loved ones that make no sense, and to the point that it sometimes incapacitates me. I have religious, medical and sexual obsessions. For instance, I keep worrying I have AIDS even though I have been tested negative multiple times...shit like that.


Those are my "mental health problems." But exercise and good nutrition plus a little self help usually gets me by. i don't like to rely on meds or therapy from someone I dont know very well. But the bigger problems in my life are like, I feel like I don't have a future. I feel lost in the world. I had a scholarship to school but decided partying was more important and flunked out. Now Im going to community college, studying music (an impractical major most tell me) My every wish since I was a kid was to be a pro musician. I can't see myself doing anything else. But its hard, and my family doesn't really understand. like If I went on tour or something, they would think that was crazy. Im the baby of my family and my parents are getting old. I wish I could make some money and be able to help them out a bit, but I dont know how...Many people in this world have much worse problems I know, but mine still manage to get me down sometimes. I feel like Im going crazy most of the time.

Soothskater,
I can relate to everything you said man. Im an avid reader myself. Mostly theological texts and history for some reason...but looking to branch out. Id definitely appreciate some ideas on what to get into next. Im sure many others would as well. Thanks

 

I am sorry to be this direct, but did you do something in your life that you feel sooo quilty of? I am asking this just because I want to help, I don't wan't to be offencive or anything similar. It just seems to me that somehow you are punishing yourself for something, or at least you are expecting that something punish you. Maybe I am wrong, but thats the feeling I got. If that is the case, you just need to learn to forgive yourself, but let me not asume, I'll wait for your responce. Anyway, I think you came on right place, here we have just love for each other, and thats what we are all sending to you!

 

For some reason this sounds terribly familiar! Shapeshifter seems to be onto something (well at least thats how it was in my situation) I have put myself through a lot of similar things that you are going through and honestly I still somewhat struggle with certain aspects. Look at it this way, at least you are fortunate enough to be able to recognize these things as problems within yourself. Many people lack the ability to do this and suffer greatly because of it. The first step to fixing a problem is recognizing the problem and being honest with yourself about it. You have done both.

The best advice I can give is make a serious effort to reverse these manifestations. For example, if you get a bad or negative thought like something bad might happen to a loved one, STOP, take a couple deep breaths, and replace it with a loving good thing that could happen to that loved one. Then hold on to that thought the best you can. Do that every time. When you think you should take a shower ask yourself why and will your self not to. Don't misunderstand me I realize that might be tough but you can do it. Remember for each negative thought you get, replace it with positive ones. You must interrupt this negative thought process. This isn't as easy as it sounds because of the habits you have already, but with some effort you CAN fix this. You choose your thoughts/actions they don't choose you! Remember, breath. Don't force deep breaths. Slowly inhale and exhale nice and smooth, as deep as you can without being forceful, calm, soft, and easy. Like the ocean tide. Trying this should help you reverse these negative thought patterns! For each negative thought try to produce multiple positive ones. But realize it is going to take some effort. Eventually you will be turning all your negative energy into positive energy no problem! Begin to send out these positive good thoughts about everything and everyone you encounter. Beautiful things can and will happen should you do so. If you love your universe then it will love you!

As for your future, well I'm in the same boat. I think we all want to help out our family money wise. We all want good things. Don't worry so much about it. Your path with unfold. If music is what you are passionate about then that is what you should do!

As for some books that I thought were good and that helped me:

Sixth Sense - Stuart Wilde
Carlos Castaneda - Journey to Ixtlan
Carl G Jung - A man and his symbols
Michael Talbot - The Holographic Universe ( Really Interesting )
Vanda Scaravelli - Awakening the Spine

Hope this helps!

 

trust me whatshappenin23, you're not mentally incapacitated. it just sounds like you have a lot of stress. it'll eventually get better. the best thing you can do is just to sit back and enjoy the ride.

 

good advice soothskater. whatshappenin, you're definitely not mentally handicapped. its placebo if anything.. thats what i make out of what you told us.

i agree with gucci, you're simply stressed. just meditate to positive thoughtforms. hold on to one thought that makes you happy and meditate to it.

this only exists because you almost insist it does.

i dont want to offend you, but im with rygoody.. lsd DOES sound like it could help you, i dont want to make any guarantee's though, for i don't know you personally. just go on a nature trail and have some fun if you do go for it.. thats what i would do if i were in your shoes.

all the best man.

 

you very well could have aids. the virus can stay dormant for years before it surfaces and blood tests would give you negatives right up until that day. GL

 

thanks remedy. a male recieving HIV from vaginal intercourse is not likely. The antibodies can be missed by tests for MONTHS not years. This is an obsession of mine,I have done the research. But thanks anyway.

Everyone else. thanks, really.

 

for the majority of the population that is true. but when you mix drugs into the equation, normal hiv antibodies may never appear until years later. my good friend got tested about eight years ago and was negative. he didn't test positive until five years ago because the antibodies were so delayed. drugs fundamentally change your immune system responses even if you discontinue use. i would reccomend getting tested every 3 months.

and btw, vaginal intercourse is one of the highest risk activities, preceding only a blood transfusion with an hiv positive person.

 

actually no anal sex is higher risk. Ive never heard of the drug thing...that sucks

 

Forget about HIV and other things for a moment. You never answered my question, so I'll ask you again. Did you do something in your life that you feel very sory for, or do you for any reason belive that because of something you are not equal as others? Are you maybe a gay? Again I want to make clear that I am not asking this questions to be offensive or to insult anybody, I just feel that I can help, but I need to know this. If you feel unconfortable to speak publicly, please PM me. I just wish you and everybody here all the best.

 

wtf is wrong with the people that are calling me insane?
im sooo far from insane its funny
im an extreamly nice person and the "average" person is mean to someone at sometime, if im not mean to anyone ever does that make me insane?
or does seeing mild visuals when im not tripping make me insane?
are you guys just bad people or whats up with that?

if i could go back id do it all again.