My wife shared me with her best friend for 30 years of our 45 year marriage. They were both bi and my wife felt it was cheating if I did not take part. That is it, nothing fancy. Our gf lived with us for about 7 years full time and then got married and split her time between her two relationships. We occasionally socialized with her husband and once he went with us on vacation and left his wife with us while he did his thing, whatever that was. His wife only said that they had an arrangement and not to ask any questions. I am not one to look a gift horse, or even two, in the mouth. I know this sound false, but it was my life. We were in a poly triad but we lasted a lot longer than most. My wife and I became just a couple 7 years ago and due to our age and medical issues, are not looking to replace her. In fact, she called us yesterday to tell us she still loves us. She may visit this fall. Funny thing is that since we were in this triad for most of our adult life, it was our normal life. We never spoke about it or even the sexuality of the two women. I did not realize that all three of my relationships were with bi women that I did not know were bi until later. My wife says that is because after having sex with me, they turned to women. I do not know if wife swapping and threesomes with other women counts. If so, we did that too. Obviously we did not have a monogamous marriage. The last time I shared my wife with a guy was a wife swap with our best friends at the time. We both hated it and stuck to FFM threesomes only. I did not know that my wife was fantasizing about sex with women then. I thought that she was just allowing me to have sex with other women in a safe environment that posed no threat to her. Now I know that she was repressing her bisexuality. It was a different time when being non hetero could easily ruin your life.
My husband has asked me if I'd have sex with a close friend of his. I haven't given him a straight answer however I know I'd actually enjoy being screwed by his friend but I guess I'm most scared that if the fantasy becomes a reality I become a'slut'.
I wouldn't consider you a slut by no means, especially if your husband wants to share you. I have to admit that my wife has became very fond of our friends dick in her pussy once we started sharing. It just adds to her sexiness in my opinion.
I spent six months watching my best friend repeatedly fuck my wife cross-eyed (and actually got her to beg him to do it again) and I've never once consider her a slut. I suppose, technically however, she is. Virtually every dictionary definition I can find defines a "slut" as "A sexually promiscuous woman", where "promiscuous" is defined (in this context) as "not restricted to one sexual partner." Some definitions add to that definition "Indiscriminate in choice of sexual partners." Now, you can interpret that a lot of ways. For example, in the strictest interpretation, if you've ever had sex with more than one person, you're a slut. Others might interpret it to mean you are married or in a committed relationship and still have sex with other people (with or without your partners knowledge or permission.) Or, you could just be single and like "a different flavor of the week". Slut is so subjective that it's almost impossible to get any two people to agree on who is and who isn't. Many people (a lot of whom are regulars to this forum) believe that the word should be stricken from the English language because it's archaic and lacks rigor. As for myself, I might be willing to extend the "slut" definition to someone who's "indiscriminate in their choices of sexual partners." If the strictest definition (above) is the only correct definition, then my wife IS a slut, I encouraged her to be one, and I'm proud of her for it!
When my girl and I finally did this it was as good or better than i imagined. After we were done and the third left, we we kissed talked and relived it lol. It all depends on the couple.
[SIZE=12pt]I can see what you’re saying with your technical definitions of the word "slut", by is there a need to label this at all? You have both agreed to venture into the realm of partner sharing and you both gain satisfaction from it, either by watching or partaking, so why the need for a label that (let’s be honest) has such a negative connotation? If you feel the need to label your partner with these terms, you are just perpetuating the stigma that comes with it. [/SIZE] [SIZE=12pt]I feel that partner sharing isn’t new and that our conservative western society simply casts it into the category of inappropriate and even sinful. The truth is that promiscuity is something we see even in nature, from both males and females. In certain species of birds (for example), males are promiscuous to increase their chances of passing on their genes to the next generations; females are promiscuous to increase their chances of potential mates providing resources and investing in the care of her offspring (Levay & Baldwin, 2012). My point of all this is that promiscuity and partner sharing are natural behaviors, regardless of the reason. Although society is becoming more accepting of sexual freedoms, we have to make sure we are note embracing the stigma associated with partner sharing by referring to your partner as a slut, even if you say it with pride. [/SIZE] [SIZE=12pt]Tereesa, as far as your initial question about whether or not you should comply with you partner’s request, I guess the best advice that I could give is do what feels right for you. If you are comfortable with it and your partner is supportive, there might not be any harm in giving it a try. If you decide to move forward with this and then decide it’s not something you want to go through with, your partner should hopefully be supportive of your decision and you should back out. In the end, you should feel comfortable with the decisions you are making about your body and sex life. [/SIZE] [SIZE=12pt]Levay, S., & Baldwin, J. I. (2012). [/SIZE][SIZE=12pt]Human sexuality[/SIZE][SIZE=12pt]. Sunderland, MA: Sinauer Associates, Inc.[/SIZE]
Good advice and comments PsychGirl05. Though I am not into it, however I don't mind if my husband decides to share me with his friend, or his friend wishes to share his wife with my husband. We are living in an age of freedom - freedom of thought, sex and act. I believe so long as both husband and wife agree to this arrangement, let it be a part of life.
I don't at all feel the need to apply the label "slut" (or any other label, for that matter) to this sort of behavior. I was simply saying to the previous poster that, if should a label were applied (by her, her partner, or anyone else), it was (under the circumstances) something to embrace rather than be ashamed of.
