So my boyfriend just...

Just to be clear, this is the boy that you left your fiancé for right?

 

I'd be pissed I guess too if my BF did that and left.
We discussed AM and PM sex and IMO if we want morning sex and we have time to freshen up then its all good especially if we played around the night before. He agrees and says AM sex is good, doubt he'd try snatching a freebee tho like that. On Saturday and Sunday mornings I'd like to jump back in the sack and play around,,, I find nothing wrong with even spending the day in bed when we both have a free day together.
I think for women we like to wake up and have a reason to go at it, like both are ready, not one stealing a quickie and running off.
Hope it all works out and both find a common play time that works both ways. Sounds like you might after all.

Funny story to add to this,,,
My first hubby woke up one morning and looked at me,,, he had a sudden thought,,, wouldnt she like to wake up with me on top of her going at it,,,
He got on and started humping away, I am a deep sleeper so he knew he'd be at it for a few mins before I would wake up and he really thought this was a good idea,,, till I did wake up, thought I was being raped by some stranger and literally lifted him off and over the side of the bed, ran into the washroom to get my shit together and hide till the offender would leave,, or something would happen. Once I came to in my head I realized what just happened and I went into the bedroom to see if he was ok. He was still on the floor, in shock at the power I had to toss him on the floor like I did. He never did that again.

 

Why yes. I'm flattered that you're keeping track.

 

yep, jacking off is like doing a line of coke for me. the effects don't last terribly long, but there's no chance of going to sleep for the next 15-30 minutes.

uh, just take a piss then. that's a lot quicker than jacking off, and it deflates at approximately the same rate after either one.

nah, i hear about it plenty. it's just that it's from the same guys that claim they get a free blowjob every time they go to the strip club. in other words, pathetic liars. probably the same guys that join internet forums to talk about how they have 9 inch dicks and can't cum until 4 hours after giving their girl her 34th orgasm of the night.

 

Dump him, he sucks.

 

Nah, not for that... He's 22, has been isolated living in the hills and was homeschooled as a child. He just needs to be educated on how other people react to things. He's sexually very go with the flow, says he would be totally fine with me doing the same to him if I just needed to get out some sexual tension and run, but that he can totally see where I am coming from and doesn't want me to feel that way in the future. Sometimes people are just different and don't automagically click perfectly in every way. We both learned some things about each other that day. I still feel like it was really selfish, and I'm still not 100% over it, but I forgive him. He just didn't know any better. But he knows now, by god...

 

I don't mind being objectified every now and then.

 

yeah thats fucking weird, sounds like hes fulfilling some kind of weird rape fantasy..

 

You're taking all this way too seriously and personally. If you're going to analyze to death (with a negative attitude) every time he touches your or jacks off, you're going to be miserable with anyone. He woke up needing to get off, you're right there, he didn't have time to finish you. What's hard to understand about that? Some girls are okay with that on occasion, some love it, some are so self-absorbed they take it as a personal slight. If he's being selfish for getting off without having time to finish you, you're being selfish for thinking every encounter needs to be perfectly balanced or should revolve around making you feel loved, adored, etc. He's a guy. He needs to get off 3-4 times as often as you, and in a variety of ways, not just "making love." Most girls are fully aware of this and give ample hand jobs, blow jobs and even fuck without always needing an orgasm. The fact that he's jerking himself off means he was either being nice by trying not to wake you or he's not used to getting what he needs from you in the number-of-releases per week department. You can either accept reality or hold out for a guy who hides the truth from you.

 

l find it hot. l'd have finished myself off, thankful he had waken me up like that.

But don't listen to me. If it makes you feel bad, just ask him not to touch you, unless he has the time and inclination to give you an orgasm.

 

Hey everybody that's still posting. Read post #26.

 

I am sorry this happened to you.

xoxo

 

It happened to me...once.

As for the OP, I guess I can only speak from personal experience. I have waited till I noticed my girlfriend was waking up, then put the moves on her, or soft heartedly suggested morning sex. I've never woken her up though, I would feel quite guilty. A couple times I believe my advances were greeted with something to the effect of, "well, do your thing." or, "You've got five minutes."

What I'm getting at is, try not to take it so personally. Or do take it personally depending on how you look at it. I mean, I (much like your boyfriend I'm sure) occasionally do this because my lady's a fox and it excites me that I get to wake up next to her and that she's chosen me as a mate. We have great sex, and I want to make her feel good. She makes me feel good and sometimes I want that even though she's only half awake.

It doesn't need to feel impersonal or like you're being used. As long as he's wantig it for the right reasons, I would think you could feel flattered.

Also, as Undies said, Orison too, it gives me a lot of energy. If I wake up faced with my girlfriend's naked body and I have a 9-12 hour crummy day ahead of me... I want it now.

 

I totally agree, and yes I realize it's very much a "guys" point of view and granted I can understand how you waking up by being fondled can be unsettling. But the reality of it is guys (like dogs) are pretty instinctual at times and this was just an instinctual act & nothing more. And yes he used you to help get is rocks off, which from a certain perspective means you turn him on and that is a good thing. Now had you not just laid there and turned around or engaged him, I'm pretty sure he would have said to heck with the meeting and gotten you off too, but you just laid there so he finished and went about his day. Rude or not it was a simple instinctual act.

Ask yourself this. Would you rather he get up out of bed, go over to the computer and go beat off to porn (basically look and fantasize about other woman)? Cause bottom line his sexual need or release isn't going to just go away, one way or another he's going to jack off, it's either to you or porn, you get mad at him is going to make the choice pretty easy.

Not trying to be an ass, just brutally honest and trying to help you get in his mind.

 

That's pretty much what I've done too. Alarm clock goes off and she usually hits the snooze and slowly wakes up. I'll move into the spoon position with her and either just cuddle her till we have to get up or if "he" wakes up and I start getting really horning with my throbbing pee pee wedged in her ass then I'll hint or flat out ask for a morning quickie. It doesn't do anything for her as she can never get off quick, but most of the time she obliges me.

There have been a couple times though during the middle of the night where either I had some erotic dreams or something and I'm just hornier than hell, and yes in those few times I have discreetly rubbed one out while putting a hand on her. I don't fondle her clit or anything, just having him hand on her seems to help do the trick, but I'm not trying to wake her or anything.

So yeah what the bf did to the OP is probably a tad further than I would have taken things per say but eh, everyone is a little different...

 

Hey guys, it's ok to wake up and spoon your girl and even want something, why did he bother whacking his own dick tho and leaving her half on her way? Why didn't he work on her and she work on him and they both get off, he could have whacked off in the bathroom for all it was, go to a porn site instead? Again why didn't he engage with her rather then jack off himself?
This would make me feel used too. Just because he woke with a willy doesn't mean she is there as his toy just because it happened, there is a thing called self control.
I wouldn't bother with sex in the morning because my guy goes off to work early, on a Saturday or Sunday,,, while there is time for a quickie or even a long one, sure.
Maybe it's just me because it's never happened that way yet I have had and enjoyed morning sex,,, when it can be a two way street and no one gets left half done. Mind you I am all about pleasing each other, not being a toy for anyone's personal use. Looks like things are resolved for now and he gets it, that's all that had to happen. A little respect for his lady. Sex is a great thing in a marriage but it's not a given right because he feels wood. That would mean he could yank her from her movie in the evening too or take it from her at 4 am too. Seriously sex between two is a bond not a fix.

 

^^^^ On that, I do think it is very selfish. Meaning what would have bothered me was the "sorry, don't have time for you... gotta get to work soon"... like, then why did you bother? That's rather selfish...

 

Sallysmart, sometimes sex is just a fix... for both men and women.

 

Interesting,,,, this is when you need one of them Master Blaster masturbator thingies you can buy online, only a couple bucks probably if you buy it direct from China. That's a fix.
Meanwhile if you have your woman to take care of your fix then she is not all that much to you but a toy. Better rethink that before you see a good woman walk away on you. We are not that useless. We enjoy sex too, not being used for it.

 

There is such bad logic in your reply, I can't cover it all. 1) Men and women get sex fixes from each other all the time and often enjoy doing it... tells a lot about you that you assume this is something negative. 2) A woman that takes care of her man is by definition more useful than one that doesn't, not "useless" as you say. 3) A woman taking care of a fix takes a few minutes of her day so your belief that such women cannot be "all that much" to a man means you have judged and objectified her for a tiny fraction of her life. 4) A lot of women occasionally enjoy being treated as toys, used, or taking care of her man's fixes. Your denial of their desires show your philosophical outlook is deeply flawed. 5) Your last reply is entirely baseless and judgmental. People can see your outlook is coming from a place of bitterness.