So my b/f is a heroin addict...

Exactly.

 

The girl is 19, she is too young to saddle herself with someone else's problems. That is my cold, hard opinion. If he cleans himself up and comes back, that would be different.
It's not like they have are married and have children to think of...sheesh.


There is no shame in walking away from this guy.
No, I didn't say "run for your life!!11!"

 

Nobody accused anyone of saying run for your life. And nobody got so excited that they typed a few 1's instead of a few exclamation points.
AND nobody is asking her to saddle herself with someone elses problems. The fact is that she came here asking for help as to how to help someone she obviously cares very deeply for, and most of the replies were just 'leave him' with nothing more to add other than a few remarks about how he wont change. So, what if that were the approach we took to people who have mental illness or phsyical disease? Not trying is just selfish, in my cold, hard opinion...>.>>.

 

I do not know. Sorry.

 

smart!!
stay on outta this one. it's gettin pissy

 

Oh yea Dave that's right, keep running away for your life. So typical

 

:auto: im the hell outta here faaaast

 

:frown: Hey :driving: Slow down mister

 

Damn,
I got nuthin.
fucker

 

haha :frown:

 

Meh. I don't really care what people think of my opinion.
This isn't her child or her parent AND it isn't a mental illness or disease. That's when I'd say to just hang in there.

He got this way because of his own actions. Not everyone has to be a martyr...

This is the internet and I will say what I please. She came in here looking for answers and I gave mine.

 

Yea well...atriot:

 

I dont think anyone's telling you not to say what you please. I think that's what we're all doing.
The fact that he's addicted to heroin is his own doing, but people dont just wake up one day and think "hey, let me get addicted to this drug", there are a lot of things that can lead someone to a life of addiction. I'm not saying it justifies the fact that he's being irresponsible to himself, but thinking "Oh, he did that to himself" shows very little effort in trying to understand. Again, him stopping to use, is something that only him can choose to do. Nobody is going to convince him, is something that he needs to want, but from what she has said he has at least attempted to, with getting on the methadone and then trying to cut down from it. He didnt succeded, but he tried and that's a sign of wanting to be better, no?
I know I have no idea how hard it is, to stop an addiction, specially not an opiate addiction, but I really do think that having someone by your side helps. It's not like "oh, I have to help him, it's my duty" or anything like that, is that if she loves him and there's no other reason for her not to be with him and she sees a willingness in him to get better and SHE feels like the right thing to do is to stay with him, well I dont see anything wrong with that.

 

The OP left the most important thing unsaid...

What kind of relationship does she have with her boyfriend?

That's what's important. Anything else is useless conjecture or prejudice.

 

(but try convincing most of the people here of that... and anyways dan was REALLY addicted to heroin for years and he's been clean for 9 years now. it happens)

 

wait addiction isnt a mental illness?


then why does insurance cover is like an ILLNESS and really when you think about relapses... they are a part of ILLNESSES. I'm not sure if I consider addiction a mental or physical illness though. I suppose both.

 

Gawd it's be great to see where this is in two years.

 

Well, here is what I suggest should be done... in fact, I'm gonna rally for it. Since addiction is something that starts with a compulsion in the brain and eventually leads to damage of the body and since there is an argument that addiction isn't a disease (which getting too loud about would only take away treatment of such people without a disease... who umm just like drugs a little too much)....

I think other "diseases" should be called what they really are. Type 2 Diabetes... starts with something in the brain where a person likes being lazy and likes bad food a bit too much (which then effects the body)... well, that is not a disease anymore either. It's called liking food too much.

Heart Disease? Depends on whether it's based on genetics or liking being lazy, smoking cigarettes, eating unhealthy food. Just call it as such- not taking care of the body.

I think if we're gonna make one thing into a non-disease, the rest of the non-diseases should follow.

Anyways to the OP- I would never leave someone I LOVE for something that is a disease. Unless I would leave someone with lung cancer because they didn't quit smoking....however, that doesn't mean put up with shit. With any disease that is caused by a lifestyle choice- it's not their fault for having the disease but they do have a choice on what they do then. People with diabetes that continue to eat massive amounts of sugar are ridiculous, etc. I would support the person but that doesn't mean I'd let them steal my stuff and spend all my money to buy "junk food".

 

call the cops when he's shooting up. throw his ass in jail
then move on with your life

 

*whistles and looks the other way*