meeting the one

thats great see if was was good at words like you thats how i would have put it, well done indeed<

 

why though? I think my boyfriend is perfect for me, at the same time i felt like asking other people's opinions/stories on meeting their lover...

Finger, I like your input a lot

 

sorry I thought you were asking because you were unclear of your feelings. Like I said earlier in this thread, when you know you just know. You seem to know..how lucky you are!

 

this is hot.

 

To me that just sounds like a whole load of crap, lets break it down:

If I hear a girl talk like that, I will immediately assume the hubby is soooo whipped

There's plenty of stuff partners never say to each other: Yes you look fat in those pants. Your dick is too small. I would have preferred to have married my first girlfriend etc etc

Stronger than what? Better than whom exactly?


In the end we have no idea, if we spend decades with one person, we have no idea if our lives would have been better off without them, or with someone else, we only live one life, we have nothing to compare it too

...except back when we were awkward teenagers of selfish 20 somethings. Maybe that secure feeling has nothing to do with the partner, maybe it just comes with age anyway

 

Hi. Thanks for setting your response off on the right note.

Then it's obvious you have no idea what I'm talking about. Did you not read the words equality and freedom? I have read a few of your posts now that display views of women that are a little off-target, if you ask me.

Never thought any of those things or anything similar but if I did I wouldn't have an issue saying, if I wanted to, and he could say the same and we'd consider whether or not I really was fat in certain pants or his dick was too small, and if he'd rather have married his first girlfriend I'd ask if he wanted to leave or if we could sort it out.

Stronger than before we met. Better than who I was before we met. I'm talking entirely about growth of the self here, not claiming being in love makes you superior to anyone.

I think if you've had an amazingly happy and fulfilled life and relationship with that person, it's pretty obvious they've enriched it. Lets see, I can have this awesome connection where I can say what I want to someone, be what I want with someone, share which experiences I want to, give what I want, and get so muh love, understanding and challenges in return.....or not, for some reason. Think I'll stick with this thing

As I stated, it's not all roses. We're human and face challenges all the time, and with two people that's two lots of challenges, plus the ones the combination of you brings up. But it's worth it. Huge understatement there, but I don't want to alienate you and raise images of teenage crushes and teddy bears in your mind by talking about love.

 

Right on, fingermouse!

 

Eww yes, so Obvious. Me being what I am, I usually get the kind of talks from both male and female that they wont have with the opposite sex or their straight same sex counterparts, the kind of discussions none of the rest of you get to hear. Which is kind of cool in a way, makes it seem like we are a third sex if you will, but it does make it seem like you are all bullshitting to each other.

Equality? Rarely do I see equality, Standard trade off is usually he's the protector, provider, works more hours, gripes about that. She's the homemaker, stresses more about she's more an influence on how the kids turn out, or has to deal with the kids more, gripes that he doesnt understand that stress. Or worse, they both work the same hours and she still has to do most of the homemaking.

Freedom? Most guys do prefer the security of marriage, but Freedom is rarely a word they associate with it

My views on women are a little of target? Thats in part cos you are women, but its also cos you are part of that group, that on one hand when everyone else is around will dismiss me "Ahh, what do you know about marriage", when I live in a country where I cant even marry my partner if I wanted too, then on the other hand suddenly when no one else is around all of a sudden my job is marriage counsellor - then you wonder why we get snotty

If thats what you have, then great, but you would be in the minority

Hmmm, there's a lot of security that comes with ageing anyway, we all arent as self centred or worried about what people think compared to when we are teens, we progress in our careers, we get a bit of money behind us or at least accumulate things, put a bigger dent in the mortgage, Our families grow as our siblings families grow. How can you really differentiate between the security your partner gives you and the security other things in life give you?

Then theres kids, again watching from the outside, I dont think you girls really get how having kids changes you. Theres parts to that where you become more responsible cos thats what everyone expects of you. But there are also parts that appear programmed in. Its not just that you grow up or get more responsible, its also that you get smarter, better organised and those maternal instincts kick in to help you in other parts of life that have nothing to do with your kids. I dont know how many times I've seen the ditzy attention whore of a young girl turn into something completely different once she has kids. And overall there does seem to be more of a change in the girls, than the guys

 

I'm sorry you've had people using you to sound off abouttheir problems to so much. There are indeed lots of couples out there who don't have much of a clue when it comes to respect, equality etc, and have built-up resentment, and basically their relationships are failing. It happens all too often. This thread is about the lucky few, I guess.

Again this is all too common, but not a road every couple has to go down, if they've got the brains and the respect for themselves and eachother. Really.

No plans to marry here (bit pointless I reckon) Relationships or mariages can create greater freedom though, but it takes work and willingness not to get bogged down on both parts, aswell as a general agreement about free speech and acceptance of eachothers differences etc.

Again sorry this is your experience. I think you've met some annoying women and troubled couples.

 

I entirely agree about age and greater wisdom and experience giving you a greater sense of security about life and about yourself, and I guess my main point about being a great couple isn't about security. Ultimately security comes from within, assuming you're stable in a material sense. Too many couples become codependent with this theme of the want for greater security driving it.

Being secure in the knowledge that you're loved and respected by somebody else is different. It's a pure privilege and I'm always grateful. Too many people question it too much and become whiny insecure people, and this creates potential to scare away a perfectly good partner. If the person is with you, loves spending time with you, shares their mind and body with you and is respectful of who you are, then just accept and enjoy all that for what it is, I say. I think a good proportion of success is about staying chilled out about stuff.

 

hahahah

<3

 

that's why he loves di cock

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5oWL8xlEM58

 

Hmmm, one of the most annoying types though are those that start off with "So many other couples are this and that, when all it takes is a little communication and understanding" yada yada, then 5 minutes later she's bitching cos the hubby doesnt talk to her anymore.

Or she says stuff like you say, then you get the hubby alone and he says something like "Fuck man, she does all the talking, I do all the nodding"

 

...

*blink*

 

A male prostitute? And you're happy with that?