Wife hates that I masturbate, even though she won't have sex any longer. If she woke up to me stroking while in bed with her, hell would break loose. With the virus lockdowns I very rarely had any alone time. It's been a month!
That’s such a great, positive response to your husband’s urges. I know a lot of spouses (mine included) who would see that discovery as weird or off-putting but you turned it into another pleasurable aspect of your sex life - good for you!
NO she doesn't. Says she NEVER has. She wouldn't even touch herself during sex. Fortunately she's multi orgasmic from regular sex......at least when we had it.
No she doesn't! Says that in her 60 years on planet earth she has never. I work my ass off around here for her, have made her breakfast in bed, did a lot of work at her parents' house, fixed their car.....etc. Yes she gets coffee in the morning.
I dunno, maybe it's time some of those things just don't get done anymore. I mean, you shouldn't have to earn sex, nor should it be tit for tat - yet, we condition ourselves to think that if we do this, and this, and this, and this, that just maybe - if the sun, moon and stars all align and we have earned enough good boy points, that just maybe, she might let sex happen....and we only get set up for disappointment and eventually, hostility. Save this line for when you lose it next time after getting turned down again and again and maybe her car needs something done.....say something like this "Oh, honey, I fully understand that it's very important to you and it will make you very happy to have that fixed and I realize it will only take me about five minutes of effort for me to fix it for you......but, you know, I just don't feeeeel like doing it, I'm just not in the mooooood, I just don't want to, I'm a little tired, got a backache.... But maybe, maybe I can think about doing it next weekend, but I can't promise you - you'll just have to wait, and not try to fix it yourself - but I just might not feel like it then either, you know I have a full week......we'll have to see then, so just calm down about it. Could you imagine that?
I'm just about at that point. I've already started putting off things on her honey do list. Some things I'll do because for me they need doing. Otherwise it's F*** It!
Could you imagine making a running list of things for her to do? Sometimes I just can't understand where their brains are stuck. "Now honey, while I'm out getting my Saturday pedicure and amusement shopping, be sure to finish up with the lawn - and no masturbating while I am gone, nope, not one bit, do you hear me? I'll know if you do..."
This is a rather lovely and lively and most revealing thread among very honest people. At some point (usually late in the life track), people bravely and openly admit who they are as individuals, not only as components of a couple. I am at that juncture as well, finding that my sexual complex is just that--MY/SEXUAL/COMPLEX--and I'm fine with that. We are sexual creatures (among other aspects) and admitting it openly is almost borderline boring--who ISN'T?--but still essential. I recognize many of the "handles" here, and I thank you all for helping me in my daily wrangles with "Who the FUCK am I?"
Sometimes my wife asks me if I want some sexual tension released before bed (head or hand job). If I say let's wait a couple of days she says did you masturbate? When I say yes she seems a little hurt that my ejaculation didn't involve her. I smile and say "but it did plus 2 other rather large guys that put a contented look on your face. She smiles and says please involve me next time in person. I say I will.
I am relaxed about masturbation and we do mutual masturbation. We never discuss with any one else. I don't mind talking about it online.
Been single for quite a while , so masturbating is a must for me, never been ashamed or embarrassed about masturbating , been masturbating 2 or 3 times a day even when having regular sex . My day is incomplete without masturbating, something I so love doing and have been masturbating everyday since I was 11, (62 years)
That is just too much! Does she want you to be miserable & lacking pleasure like she is? I'm in essentially the same boat as you, but if she tried to stop me from doing it, it would be a rip roaring argument. I feel for you, man.
Asking permission to masturbate especially when she has stopped sex with you? Now I've heard it all. That is the craziest thing I've ever heard. Talk about a controlling person. OMG If that were my wife and this is just me. I would tell her, "since you won't fuck me it's like telling me to go fuck myself, so here I am fucking myself and now you are telling me not to fuck myself"? I'd tell her she has a huge control problem. But each couple is way different. Whatever floats your boat.