Is masturbation lame or what?

^ Ah, I got you. In hindsight that was probably the main cause for my troubles with masturbation when I was a bit younger.

 

Please, share!

 

Well, I've been masturbating since like, 12. Back when I was 16, I started developing issues with it. Shame, sadness, etc. etc. I figured some knew knowledge on the subject is what made it feel so disgraceful to me.
I was already atheist, so it was nothing spiritual. It was just, every time I masturbated, I got a feeling like I was doing something wrong. Like, cumming should be saved for when I am with another.
I stopped masturbating a few times for shamefully small amounts of time.
Then, I got a 'girlfriend' online. We masturbated together lots - I certainly had no troubles with it then. That ended - and the problems with it came back. They were so bad that they made me sexually frustrated and consider slutting about. (Typically, I try to stay a lover not a luster)
I've had a girlfriend for over a year now - no problems within that time period.

So, now that I think about it; it seems to have been a camouflaged version of loneliness.

 

Thanks, Duck.

I think we've experienced similar things. But I just can't get interested in women these days. I don't know why. Fear of intimacy is the only thing I can come up with.

 

Have their been any women lately that have showed interest in you? Or women you feel would normally peak your interest?

 

I have superficial contact with women frequently. Mostly in bars.

I get some degree of attention. Somewhere between Tom Cruise and a leper...lol.

The attention women give me is mostly subtle. When it isn't, I usually end up in bed with them unless I'm not attracted. Which has happened a few times recently and I hate being in the position of the rejector.

What is difficult for me is finding the motivation to initiate. Especially since women whom I'd formely be very interested in, these days look like cute nothings.

I have lots of appreciation for women. But it remains abstract and etheral. Simone de Beauvoir, Rosa Luxemburg, Theresa Cha...

 

Ah. I'd say just do what you are doing until you get the nerve or need to sign up for a dating website - which may be the best idea if you are looking for a meaningful connection with someone.

 

Existential questions about fapping, oh brother.

Just fap.

 

I know exactly what you're saying .....

While masturbation is a perfectly normal healthy outlet to satisfy a need, In truth masturbation is an illusion; it’s our way of tricking the body into believing we’re fulfilling our biological function by procreating


The body thus rewards us through the release of endorphins (which is why it feels so good)


Hotwater

 

an illusion? seems pretty real to me.

we've been equipped with this body, so it's up to us to do with it what we want. why not masturbate? feels good, harms no one. safest sex possible. I can see how it could be accompanied by negative emotions and feelings of guilt in some cases, but there's nothing inherently wrong with masturbation - only the stigma applied to it by certain parts of modern society.

 

Well if your a psycotic it could be really fucked up.. You have to have restraints{pun}..and as you grow up sexually you become atune to what is exceptable forms of masturbation are..

 

Ha! I know, brother. I think WAAAAAAAAAAY too much...lol.

 

i think it's a myth that people HAVE to be interested in relationships and matched up blissfully all the days of their lives. what crap. if you're not interested, you're not interested.

 

You got a point, KC. Maybe I'm imposing some kind of standard on myself? But what do you make of the longing?


The advice-giving smart asses tell me, oh you gotta be happy single before you're happy in a relationship.

In other words, happiness w/o material conditions, happiness as a disembodied platonic category, etc.

Maybe the fuckers know something I don't.

 

Yeah, setting limits on all of my hedonistic activity is essential for me. It helps give it meaning.

 

Did you even read what I said

I concur masturbation is a perfectly normal and healthy outlet



hotwater

 

You're dead right about it being healthy. The male orgasm helps clean and excercise the prostate. And I believe the colon as well.

 

I did read what you said, I just reacted to the illusion part. the rest of my post was meant to reinforce my point from before: masturbation is great. I'm glad you agree

 

you've got a longing for something, maybe your trying to impose a societal standard on what you're "supposed" to be longing for (a relationship) instead of a deeper longing for something entirely different. maybe try for a little while removing from yourself the concept of a relationship and just be for a while.

i'm not any kind of guru, though, but you're clearly searching for something and probably getting really frustrated because of it.

 

Masturbation is awesome. Well, it's awesome until it's over, then it seems pretty dumb. The good thing is, if you wait a little while it's gets totally awesome again!