Is being nice to everyone a bad thing? when it comes to the opposite sex?

Nah, I was just reinforcing the idea that if you want something you should go after it. So in those rare cases when a girl may encounter a guy who doesn't "get the hint", she should take the direct approach instead of letting the guy walk away being left to wonder why he didn't approach when she was sending out all the signals.

 

lol yes I know. I'm being careful.

I will say I've been given plenty of hints as well. Was @ a party a few weekends ago where I was being very confident/vibing well with the group, to the point were 5+ females "approached," me in an hour.

By approach, they randomly show up right next to my vicinity. Pull out their phone like something interesting happened. Or brush up so close to me that our shoulders are touching and they park there.


Sound great?


Unfortunately, I'm just not romantically inclined to get to know a person that feels all they have to do is just that, and it's on me to do the rest.

That female passive attitude carries over to the way we converse, to who's role it is to lead the rest. I want someone not entitled enough to engage me in an equal manner.

This is where I think western women make a big mistake. It does not make me want to start to get to know you, because I'm aware of that this will turn into a "will I prove myself" interaction. And not an open one-on-one convo without judgement or gender roles.

 

All a girl has to do is say 'hi.' It's more effective and flattering than anything else she could do.

It also doesn't tell a guy you see yourself on a higher pedestal.

 

Consider yourself lucky. The playing with the hair is the worst. When a girl starts playing with her hair or standing too close to me, I just move. I find it super creepy.

Exactly. "I like powerful women like Steffi Graff." I'm quoting that guy from Parks and Recreation. But, do women like that really exist? I decided to stop hoping for something that might actually be very rare in nature.

Exactly, the passive aggressive attitude is never restricted to the initial stages. Before you know it, she's going to use the same passive aggressive tactic to change you and manipulate you in all sorts of little self-service ways. All the while paying lip service to 'love.' Think doormat.

Same with paying for dates. It's never just the first date.

They basically don't give a fuck about you or your thoughts. And much less about having a frank conversation. Granted, they don't owe you anything. But neither do you. It's both your losses.

It's not just 'western' women, either. Trying to reason with women is useless because it is genetic. Granted, the sense of entitlement they gain from feminism reinforces their welfare princess mentality, but the fact is that it happens in all cultures.

I was raised by a feminist single parent, and I had to disabuse myself of the idea that women are my equals and that 'society' was to blame for their passive aggressiveness.

 

That's a line I won't forget.

 

Typically I like eye contact, but not when someone is boring holes into my forehead. So be natural. Everyone you meet probably has a many chips on their shoulder as you do and it's important you keep that in mind when getting to know someone. Personally, I hate chips, and avoid people with crappy attitudes.

 

Women like me don't compete against women that play with their hair, nor those that get boob jobs, or giggle, or slap a boy playfully. We slip away, and find something more grounded. And if you like "powerful" women, then why have you decided you don't like me? My looks perhaps help me with life situations such as getting good service, but I'm very sincere when I express my gratitude. It's my looks also that cause women to automatically dislike me. Lately, when it comes to passive aggressive.....it's the men around me that are far more guilty except for 2, that are very cool about just saying whats on their mind. I too was raised by a feminist single parent of which she did so probably because of all her insecurities. The movement was like a big protective blanket. I chose to use my instinct and innate personality to make my way in this world......and fuck up some of it too.

 

Though I have amazing soul-piercing friendly eyes hurray, I realize the other person has to be comfortable with it. I don't do it to everyone, and at times I have to look down or away because it can be too strong for even my own comfort. But it's fun when you're talking with a girl who's comfortable with it. So much love can be expressed through the eyes.

My eyes are just too pretty. :daisy:

How about ideal.

tbh I think the reason things don't work out is because one or both members were too passive, (or simply not attracted or available), and then you start picking apart your personality for the catalyst.

If you're aware you're too assertive, and you're trying to not be too assertive, you likely aren't being so at all. In fact, the other person may even appreciate your assertive & honest side.

**Despite what people may want to admit, hooking up with strangers is not natural nor an easy thing. &

When one or both members are passive, attraction and potential falls through the cracks. This is kind of where I think most women self-sabotage almost all pick-up opportunities.

(also when you're skeptic and only waiting to be asked questions, it's kind of hard to pull out a circus-olay-worthy conversation).

 

I get what you guys are saying. But you can't change society. So you either have to play the game as much within your rules as possible, or don't play at all. Those who choose not to play have to explore alternate methods if they want to get laid.

A lot of guys go to prostitutes for that very reason. You don't have to play the game with them. You get exactly what you want, how you want, without any strings attached. Some guys that go this route even find themselves in a real relationship with a prostitute. Granted, most of them are false relationships, but there are exceptions. And of course there are negatives to prostitutes as well.

So you have to weight the options and decide for yourself. Are you going to play the game, or seek out an alternative?

 

I would only add that:

1) most johns are married men;

2) many prostitutes are married women or have a family and perform their work hidden from their husbands;

3) most importantly, the overwhelming majority of marriage and dating arrangements involve one-sided money transfers going from husband to wife, man to woman, and it is therefore hypocritical to defend it as the opposite of prostitution;

The point you mentioned that johns do have lengthy, emotional ties to prostitutes is just more evidence to me of how similar prostitution is to marriage and dating.

Also, many marriages are saved by prostitution, rather than destroyed.

I don't want to paint prostitution in a rosy light, it is awful and I wish it didn't exist in its current form (a huge industry). But, it will always exist as long as marriages are state-enforced. So, to make it illegal is downright hypocritical.

Prostitution is a byproduct of state-enforced monogamy, rather than its opposite. And the fact that feminism jumped on the bandwagon with religion to suppress prostitution, is evidence of its hypocrisy to me.

It is also always going to exist until women are given the incentives to work productively rather than mooch from men through state-and-feminism enforced welfare.

 

LOL. that would be a big no no, dont EVER say that around any girl if you will eventually want to remove her underthingies, or any of her friends, or anyone that could remotely possibly tell her you said that.

I wont bother explaining why, its too complicated, just trust me

 

Besides the full-time pros, don't forget the strippers who do limited prostitution on the side.

This happens more often for those over 30.

 

Be kind to everyone, strippers and prostitutes included! Dont play games - love everyone and remember the golden rule.
Peace yall

 

another vote for giving up the game and only having sex with prostitutes.

 

-I'm going to keep complain on the internet.

-I may straight up tell a girl if she's hovering by me next time "If you want want to talk to me, just fucking say 'hi'." I will challenge their beliefs on how to romantically interact with a guy in person.

- I will leave girls hanging until they get it.

-I'm still young so, I will try and (perhaps not societey) but influence the way women interact with me. It's my individual influence to the journey of life, however grand or insignificant that may be.


If all else fails I'll just marry my best friend.

 

lol fuck you. Girls love pretty eyes too.

& There's really nothing to explain. Just more over-assumed bullcrap. There really isn't that much need to be insecure about a lot of things when it comes to this.

 

does he know about this plan?

 

Interacting starts with being sincere and genuine. If you catch the other person in inconsistencies, either initially or as time passes, then it is at that time you make new decisions. What you'll probably find out first though (before their bad communication skills) is that what you thought you would like, you actually don't. When the objective changes and/or agenda, that can be an honest transistion as well. It can be said straight out.

I have to say though, it is hysterical how many ways a person says "no". On sunday, the "no" I got was "I don't know how long I'll be out". Argh!

 

the only bad thing about being nice to everyone is the strain of feeling obliged to. i really don't believe we have to do that.

more directly to the possible intent of the question, many people have varying degrees of an ego problem that makes them feel that they have to posses all the love and caring of anyone they come to think of as their partner.

it is not natural to love only one person, but this insecurity about being loved, does happen in nature.

so the balance is to be generous in affection without triggering this insecurity.

and for each partnership this is different. different persons, and of all genders, feel varying and differing degrees of insecurity about affection.

 

That probably depends on the region and type of prostitute a guy visits. I went through a little prostitution phase like 7-8 years ago so I can speak on my experiences. I know most of the pros I had encounters with were not married. And most of them weren’t seasoned veterans either. I specifically tried to avoid those girls.

A number of them were single moms that had a kid to take care of, and got in the game for that reason. Some had boyfriends that knew (or didn’t know) about what they did, and some were completely single girls that wanted to buy expensive things and this was the best/easiest way for them to make really good money. Now perhaps these were the profiles I encountered because I was always with girls who were 18-22 yrs old. I’d imagine the spectrum would change for girls in higher age brackets.

But I think a lot those ties are false, created by the “john”, and are often not reciprocated by the girl. There are exceptions. I know you and I have both had relationships with a pro before. But it usually doesn’t happen that way. The girl has to not see you as a client in her eyes in order for it to be real.

I can’t speak for the US situation on prostitution. I don’t know much about the game over there, other than the fact that it’s illegal which causes a shitload of problems. But from my European perspective, I don’t think prostitution is bad at all. I think it’s great how things are set up very professionally. Anyone can walk into a nice club or brothel and choose the girl (or girls) that they like and either take them home with them, or spend time with them right there in the club. Everything is very safe, legal, and sanitary. I personally would rather see the US adopt a system like we have in Europe.