"I Can't Come In To Work Today Because..."

Damn it, just remember I have watch, 2400-0800. ( true story)

 

i have to go to a funeral for my dog.

 

Somebody started a war in the middle east, and now I gotta go clean up the mess.

 

I must go and buy those cats outside in the cold some food. And it will take time...

 

I have been hypnotized to assisinate my boss at exactly 3pm.....I must fight urge to go to work......

 

Because Leo is in the fifth house and Asparagus is conjunctifying with Uranus.

 

I got nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diharrea.....

 

It's December 31, New Year's Eve!

 

I locked Myself outta my house, so she torched my car

 

I have a hang nail.

 

Its such a lovely day. I must smell the flowers.

 

...my dog ate my homework

 

...some base head is sitting on my porch smoking coke, and I must take photos since it is Lindsay Lohan.

 

I'll have to pee... eventually.

 

....the percocet is kicking in....

 

I have a really important orgy to attend.

 

My tummy hurts.

 

I'm expecting to hit male menopause any day now

 

i'm high on mushrooms and am in deep discourse with my couch, theres absolutely no way i can leave without settling this

 

I'm playing chess with the grim reaper