I am a Crossdresser

you should watch the movie, Beautiful Boxer, its a about a Thai boxer who fights to earn money to get a sex change. He's always putting on lipstick and wearing dresses.

 

:cheers2:

 

You should watch The Adventures of Prascilla: Drag Queen of the Desert

 

i have no idea what it means to be a woman. i'm completely useless on this topic.

 

wanna play dress up tonight, baby?

 

lol. SURE!

 

hehe

 

Dont really see the deal. Doesnt really matter which bits of cloth you put on yourself. If my husband said he wanted to wear skirts Id say go ahead, have fun, I love skirts!

 

Kudos to you on having the balls to be yourself. Most people are incapable of that. My childhood friend recently came out as a cross dresser and it definitely has not changed my opinion of him at all.

 

Very interesting post. I know you asked for a female perspective, but seeing as I've been reassessing my own views on gender, I'd like to add my two cents.
I tend to define gender in purely physiological terms: If you have cock and balls, you are a male, if you have a vagina, you are a female. The distinction ends there. I am very uncomfortable with associating certain mannerisms, personality traits, clothing styles, sexual orientation, societal roles, etc. with a particular gender. In other words, while there may be some chemical/hormonal differences, I don't think gender has any bearing at all on who a person really is, in their heart, or spirit or whatever. All that, that shit you read in cosmo, is just culturally imposed bullshit. Because if I can accept that gender is a defining factor of a persons personality, then I can draw all sorts of conclusions that I know are just wrong. Like for instance, that I am somehow less a man because of my unwillingness to be a domineering, womanizing asshole. From there I just see deeping sexism and heterocentrism.
When I was about 17, most of my friends were pretty ardent feminists. I developed some very close friendships, and came to be seen, in their words, as "one of the girls". This caused somewhat of an identity crisis for me. I had a penis, and yet I was considered by my dearest friends to be a woman. I recognized that we live in a patriarchal society, and yet I was unwilling to condemn half the species (indeed, "my" half of the species) as inherently domineering or oppressive.
Since embracing an anarcho-primitivist perspective, I've slowly come to accept the various aspects of my personality that modern society has defined as feminine. I just see it as part of being a balanced person. I wear skirts from time to time. Cause it's goddamn comfortable. Not to fulfill some latent feminine part of myself. There's nothing inherently feminine about skirts, aside from what we learn from the media.
Of course, you know I'm a primitivist.... And there are certain biases that go with that, so go ahead and take all this accordingly. You know yourself better than I ever will, so this may all be bullshit. But I think the distinction between male and female will mean less and less as we let go of our civilized baggage.

 

damn right mizanthrope!!!! Way to be a real man instead of a judgemental asshole... I say you wanna wear womens clothes,,, then be you,, wear a f''ing skirt,,damn right,,, go to a rainbow gathering and count how many guys are wearing skirts,,, or in butterfly bill's case a sundress,,, You'd be surprised to know how many men are comfortable in those,,, who cares, be yourself

 

I don’t think it’s a hopeless pursuit if it’s something that is trying to gain more insight to who you really are – or want to be….

Have you named your feminine side? I think establishing an identity for this girlie part of your personality would help give her presence. From there you can build on who she is.

Some posts here have suggested hanging with female friends that are accepting of your femininity. This is a good start.

Since you weren’t born female, maybe working from the outside in, would help get you more in touch with your femininity. Most of what girls learn about being ‘girlie’ is from watching females closes to them – like I remember watching my mother getting ready for special events and as a little girl I would sit on the bed and watch her do make up, do her hear, get dressed etc as a guy your own mother would have reservations about this lol so having females friends to be around helps.

Being graceful is not so often talked about, but more so watched and mimicked. Watch how a girl talks about a certain topic and notice how she moves her hands, or touches her neck or twists her hair etc… when she walks, the steps are smaller, gentler etc…. for every task a male does – most female will do it gentler, smaller, quieter…. Another example.. eating, woman tend to take their time, putting smaller portions in their mouths, taking smaller sips from their drinks… and so on. Whereas a man would like take bigger bits, finish quicker and down his drink in now time. See what I mean….

 

I don't think there is any way to "think like a woman". You just think like you. But if you're wanting to feel that feminine mystique, have you ever gone outside dressed in you hottest chick clothes and just struttin' your stuff. Just go where there is no one that you know that will recognize you as a man and go about your day as a woman. We oftem persive ourselves in the reflection of others' eyes. If they see a woman, maybe you'll feel like a woman. I don't know, just my suggestion. I could be wrong.

 

I personally think every man has a feminine side (beyond what is openly discussed in society) and to be honest, I think it would benefit you more, to not try too hard to act like a woman, but rather, go with what feels right. Every woman is different...every woman walks and talks differently... some, even MANY, aren't "feminine" (by society's standards) at all. Feminine and Masculine are terms dubbed by society, rather than an actual quality that can be used to differentiate between people, in my opinion.

I think the more you let go, as a person, in general, the more your "feminine" side will come through. I don't really know how to explain it.

But anyway, I just want to say I really give you props for coming to accept yourself at your age... I mean, a lot of people don't learn to come to terms with themselves or love themselves until much later in life, and sometimes, never at all.

You're a strong person! I hope you find what you are looking for.

 

Wow! Thanks for the kind words. I really appreciate everyone's - girls and guys - feedback and advice. I have definitly taken all of it into account and am happy to say that I am - or at least I think I am - somewhat on the right path for the moment.

I know it's been done already by thousands of other crossdressers, but I was thinking of starting a blog online to document my explorations of my feminine side, kind of like an online journal. I think it would be a good way to connect with other people who share the same lifestyle as well as get further advice.
I'll be starting college this fall, and have decided that by the time I graduate, I want to be able to look, talk, and act like the girl inside me.

Once again, thanks to everyone here for the awesome words!

 

It's hard to describe how being a woman feels, but I think this poem will help you.

PHENOMENAL WOMAN
by Maya Angelou
​

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing of my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can't see.
I say
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.
Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
The palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me. ​