How to get fired...ABC style

Loudly exclaim every single thought you have for as long as your voice holds out.

 

mouth all the words that your boss says as he says them

 

nod off while giving an important presentation

 

Open all the office windows during a snowstorm when everyone is having lunch

 

pour petrol all over yourself, call the press and threaten to bitch/moan/lie about his practices, before setting light to yourself, unless you get a pay rise..... you may not get fired immediately, but you might mysteriously disappear a little while later... in effect, FIRED!

 

quietly jerk off infront of many customers

 

raise awkward issues, constantly...

 

Strip. unless you're a stripper, in that case Stay clothed.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1c6tZrx6fD4"]YouTube - Annoying Coworker
beating her up.. ;p

 

we forgive you, because it's you... but we're on T....

tug at your boss earlobes lovingly when ever you see him\her...

 

U - Undress in your Boss's office and spread sperm all over the room,when he comes in tell him you just watched Porn and couldnt resist

 

V-Vandalize every square inch of available wall space.

 

wound your boss with your giant viking sword.

 

Xenophobia... liberal lashings of it...

 

Y - Yell like crazy @ your co-workers,tell them the boss put YOU in charge,when the boss comes in start yelling and commanding him;tell him HIS BOSS put you in charge,when he calls to find out;LAUGH AND CARRY ON LIKE A 5YO

 

Z....stands for Zoo...thats where you lost the bosses kid and he got pecked in the face by a peacock

 

ask for boars head by name

 

boner.............show yours to the bosses wife

 

C....Create a bogus employee and cash the cheques

 

dont tell anyone but im the one that left the floater in there over the weekend