How to get fired...ABC style

L: Lick your nipple at the top of every hour.

 

M: Make loud, inappropriate noises such as farting or sexual moaning/grunting.

 

N - Nose into your boss's private life and make a blog about it all and after he has sexual encounters with his wife,show him the blog (Including the vid of him and his wife)

 

O - Open your fly and then show everyone what you just had pierced...

 

P- put down his ties

 

Q - Quietly sneak up behind the boss and give him a wedgie...

 

r- rub one out(choke your chicken) on your bosses desk, while he is sitting at it.

 

S - have your bosses balls when he is asleep, put the pubes in his coffee. Then proceed to wear a t-shirt claiming 'I stuck your pubes in your coffee'.

 

ride a donkey to work every day and start doing miracles...

 

T- tell him to go to hell

 

U- use large amounts of explosives to level the building

 

V-vacate without notice

 

W - Wank on your customers/clients

 

X-post xxx-rated pictures on the companies computers

 

Y - yoga while in an important meeting

 

Z - Zip out of a meeting telling the boss you have to goto the restroom... 5 hours later call from the golf course and laugh @ him asking how the rest of the meeting went

 

A- apple pie in his face

 

burnt offering to the gods, using bosses children...

 

c- cutting the legs and wheels off of your bosses chair, then setting it back together for them to sit in like nothing ever happened

 

dig 6 foot deep holes in the carpark... don't stop digging them till you have enough for each person you work with to have their own hole... then skulk around the office for a few days, saying inappropriate dark things like, "your head would look good on a plate"... should only take a few days, a week, tops