how much do you feel

OH believe me, I am a strong, strong woman. She's a strong person as well. Sometimes it takes more strength to allow things to be instead of trying to manipulate. it takes alot of strength to listen to your own voice.

her daddy was doing good for the past year and a half...this is a recent fall back on to the track. we live 6 hours from one another too

 

It must have been a tough choice to move six hours away from eachother. As much as you may not like eachother.

but .... the most important part of your post was this:"Sometimes it takes more strength to allow things to be instead of trying to manipulate", which may be the case, but is certainly not always the case and is indeed a very slippery slope into practical irresponsibility. I say practical because as much as we like to believe anything, at the end of the day we have no flipping clue what the fuck's going on with the world on those fundamental levels that we all seem to dream on.

 

Mariecstacy
Kids will evolve from whats put infront of them.
You just need to put different options /things to look at , infront of them.

Alot of us have a bad /unsuitable parent or 2.But the kid does all the better , for it , in the end.

Some fathers avoid their kids.Often , its not because they didn't want to try.Its
because they feel they'd already failed.Does that make sense?
Maybe u'd need to be a guy to understand? : )

 

OH he and I are friends. We've worked past everything that has been. We make the journey back and forth many times through out the year.

and we all make our own decisions based on our own beliefs.

noone knows what they would do until they are in a situation. and regardless of what we know and don't know...we still need to make decisions that we feel are right for us and the situations.

I posted and therefore you can judge all that you want....its fair.

are you a parent?

 

well her writing him was my fault. She was writing a story in her room and I thought it said Hi Daddy. SO I asked if she wsa writing him a letter. Eek...then she thought it was a good idea.

it is what it is. I was just having an emotional moment and should not have posted them in random thoughts....

and yes, i do understan.....that describes her daddy perfectly. he feels he's messed up and so stays in that darkness.

 

No I'm not. But parenting if parenting is anything, then it is an amature sport, in which case you don't necessarily have to be one to be one, know what I mean?

Is it true that we make our decisions based on our beliefs? I've often found it the case that, upon real introspection, confusion tends to be the only real constant in the realm of human belief. It may be the case that the most universal human belief is stated to be this "i don't know what I believe". But maybe not. I'm not sure. I'm too confused to be sure.

Another question can be made about whether we make our decisions about what we make before we are faced with the inputs of the question. There is a great book called Blink which touches on the subject. Maybe its the case that we don't consciously make decisions. Perhaps they are unconsciously made according to our belief system, which of course, may or may not be founded on anything.

I only meant to say that your daughter will take after you more than any other person in the world.

 

Mariecstacy
No no , I agree with u 1 million percent.Its so sad for her. : (
I don't know why he's hiding.*Often* its feeling ashamed.

As an example , I went to a wedding of Black Britons.
There were virtually *no* grandparent age males there.
The kids were wealthy - ganxxsters ,businessmen and an Olympic sprinter.

The grandfathers disappeared because they could only get rubbish jobs in Britain.
They felt so ashamed , and couldn't adjust to their new country and be sthg the kids could be proud of.So it was common to disappear.

They thought it was better than for the kids to have "idiot" fathers. : (

Hope you feel better about it soon : )
Kids *can* be very resilient : )

 

Way too much.... wich was a bad thing in my case and I fuck up in life a lot because I always thought that was an okay way to live.

 

I'm intrigued by the book and will check it out.

YOu have spoken much sense here. thank you for speaking your truths.

 

I am my dad in so many ways and I'm proud of that.

 

Awww....

I had a very rocky relationship with my father during my childhood (my parents are divorced) but it was almost always unstable, even when my parents were married.

It's actually a positive thing that she does feel close to him right now regardless. I can understand how you would feel though, it breaking your heart when he doesn't call her. I know my own mother went through that when my father failed to call me or take his visitations. I know that must be hard on a parent to see...you dont want to see your child hurt.

 

I've influenced my parents far more than they influenced me.