How long has it been since you've gotten laid?

Fuckin shit, sorry for the harsh language. I almost got some action, well I did get some action but it was a fucking total letdown. I was getting gas on my way home from work and a car pulls up next to me and its this girl I used to work with at a previous job a long while ago. I was like "woah is that so and so I see?" and shes like "Holy shit Eric!" and we chatted while we filled up and I gave her my number and suggested we hang out some time. She took it and was in agreeance.

Well around 7 I get a call and its her and she invited me to go chill at her apartment which was like 10 min away from my house so I was like sure I'll cya in a few. So I head over there and she lets me in and first thing I see is a nice 20" or so glass bong chillin on her entertainment center. I of course commented on it which led to smoking. We were all baked reminicing about old times and she starts bringin up random shit like talking about how she heard mad people were just hookin up for the hell of it and stuff. It caught me off guard completely because it came out of left field, but I just played along.

Time passes we smoke the bong again were watchin some tv and chit chattin and she goes "You wanna just fool around for the hell of it?" In my head I was like doin the happy dance but I just replied with "hell why not."

So we start kissin and shit and our hands are wandering and all that jazz, shes been goin in and out of my pants every so often. So after doin this for like 5 or 6 min she just fucking stops. FUCKING STOPS!!!! I'm like "Is everything okay?" then shes like "Umm I think I need to go to bed I cant do this." I was like umm okay are you sure? She got all apologetic and shit and I left, it sucks so bad I was soooo close to killing my drought and it just vanished in the blink of an eye. WTF I hate this.

Sorry that was so long for the cliff notes just read the paragraph above this.

 

fifty years since I've touched a twat

 

Wow wtf. I can't imagine how incredibly annoyed you must've been.

Why would someone initiate something like that when they were obviously not ready!?

 

I dunno it blows my mind. I'm sitting here thinking "Did that just happen" its easily one of the top 5 strangest things to ever happen to me.

 

Fuck, I would never do that to anyone. Hell, I wouldn't even say anything, I would jus go straight for the kill, so to speak, lol.

 

^ That's hot. Like that'd be something that would turn me on a lot. Haha

 

me and this girl have been on and off dating since 8th grade pretty much and shes really chill to jus hang out and smoke with, and hook up with every week or two. i mean i guess were technically dating but its more just like hangin out really

 

Well then how come it couldnt have been you that I ran into at the gas station then?

 

That sucks Eric. Why are women such bitches and teases? I'm sorry man

 

I dunno if it was a tease, she was really apologetic and such. I think it was just a wierd random flip of the switch change in moods, like she got a voice in the back of her head telling her it was wrong or something, I dunno.

 

I don't know man, sex is awesome and all but I dont know how I feel about sexing up girls that hear voices in the backs of their heads

 

You know what I mean, it was a change of heart kinda thing. lol I hope I wasnt about to bang a schitzo lol.

 

last night

 

This one time at band camp...................................

 

Send me a note before you come to Chicago, I would be happy to show you my town.

 

holy fuckin shit.. im so god damn horny right now.. FUCK i need to fuck.. or eat some pussy right now!.. i could marathon fuck or munch right now.. all opied out... fuck fuck fuck fuck i wanna fuck

 

Geez somebody needs to chill the fuck down or get a girlfriend asap.

 

lol. Pent up sexual frustration.

 

Well, I think a lot like a guy when it comes to sex, so I ono... I ono why I do it that way, I just do. Being a nympho is hard work when things don't fall into place like that, real spontaneously, you know?

 

I would love to run into your ass at the gas station, Eric.