Guilty or Innocent?

Wow, you ate chocolate covered grasshoppers too? I guess I'm not the only one.
Yea, for one thing, I've found winning lottery tickets in the trash several times-the first one I saw was right at the top of the trash can and was worth $30! I immediately went and cashed it in....

Have you ever had a dream about sex?

 

I'm sure I have, but I can't remember a specific time.

Do you have any secrets that you've kept from your partner?

 

Uuuuhhhh, guilty?? (I don't think this worked out right!)

Have you ever camped out naked in your neighbor's yard?

 

Innocent.

Ever spied on someone while they were naked?

 

yup. I even think they knew....


Ever bred rats?

 

No, but I've knocked off a few that were chewing up all the ac ducts in my old house.

Have you ever eaten a reptile?

 

Well, a long time ago I ate frog legs, before I became a vegetarian.

Do you personally know any homo sapiens?

 

One or two

Ever played slide guitar?

 

not really, but I used to slide things around with delay and phaser on a quitar to entertain myself while NOT actually learning to play


ever killed a person just to watch em die?

 

Does Grand Theft Auto count?

Ever rescued someone from a fire?

 

thats my favorite game!.....no

have you ever danced on the roof of your car naked?

 

No, but I think I've probably done it clothed.

Ever get you nose hit by a fan? I did it the day before yesterday and it HURT!

 

Damn, that hurts just thinking about it-but no, it hasn't happened to me.

Have you ever been falsely accused of a crime?

 

I was once harassed by a cop on a trumped up trespassing charge. Technically I was trespassing, but the circumstances were so completely insane that it wasn't really a trespass. It's not like I wa sin someone's yard or anything.

Ever considered joining the military?

 

Sometimes


Ever sold something that didn't belong to you?

 

No. I've hardly ever sold anything.

Have you ever seen a UFO?

 

maybe, not sure what the hell it was tho

ever seen monkeys fuck?

 

No, the only Unidentified Flying Objects I believe in are ______ projectiles. Exactly.

Do you think all Republicans are out to rule the world?

 

Well, maybe not all Republicans, but certainly the ones at the top.

If you didn't live in this century, which one would you rather live in, and why?

 

the next one because i want my flying car

do you smoke too much pot