Funny Jail Story

heh, i couldn't help but laugh at the last part

 

I heard from a jailbird that correctional officers really are corrupt and put the moves on prisoners, so that could have happened. They also take bribes to order pizza in and stuff.

 

usually in jail ,, if youre caught masturbating .. depending on what part the jail you are in. In youre housed in mental health unit in a Barney Rubble outfit. Then you can probably get away with jerking off to the staff, nurses. If your in general population / depending on the type of door the facility has/ bars or doors. putting up the privacy curtain and pumping one out isnt a big deal. Exposing yourself to female staff can win you a misconduct with easy 6months in the hole. It all depends on how the officer feels about it.

When I worked for the DOC and not an inmate myself. Ive seen inmates intentionally expose themselves to staff and nurses. Most the time they just ignore it. If the housing unit is an RHU teh staff might even taunt the inmate saying they seen bigger weenies on chahwahwa dogs.

Once while working in SCI Cresson this inmate spat on me and a female staff. IT was the dead of winter and the pipes busted. Back and forth we went to get the pipes fixed. Having to move some inmates around. The guy that spat on us was a little racist jerk too. The inmate next to him was a gentle giant. We talked to him, give him smokes and he didnt like the guy next to him. This was not a jail with cement walls.. It was plaster. He kept on teasing and continued to spit and got us again when the dude in the other cell didnt like it when he spat on a nurse he liked.

He began to bang on the wall to the other cell.(room) next to him.. We told the little asshole that he was going to break thru that wall and nothing we can do about it. Since I wasn't a jail guard. I couldn't open doors. I was maintenance personnel no keys for cells. Didnt take dude long to knock a hole into the wall. And we all knew what was going on and the giant wouldn't actually do anything. Just wanted to scare him. He got the wall almost busted down when the staff pulled the asshole from the room and locked him in a far away cell where he could do no more spitting on staff. But he was petrified scared shitless that other guy was coming thru the wall. Anytime he said something we told him we will move the giant next door and we can do this all over again, but this time they might not get you out in time.

SCI Cresson was closed last year. Due to high maintenance cost. It was a shithole aways in the mountains.

When I was in jail , I had to be placed outside because my knowledge of operations threated the jail. probably wouldnt matter if my score was higher but level 1OM is about as low as you can go besides work release.

 

http://www.corrections.com/news/article/28419-calling-it-what-it-is

dave, when I was in jail doing that crap ONCE would get your ass locked up in solitary for 30 days.

A second time and you'd get written up for Indecent Exposure which is a Misdemeanor 1 and the sentence is consecutive. Except you are held in solitary until trial. You now have an additional 3-6 months tacked onto your sentence. Knowing the process, that means your 90 days is now 60 days (it takes that long) PLUS another 90 to 180 days.

The third time lands you the same thing, this time 6-12 months.

A fourth time and you win a bonus prize- a Sexual Misconduct charge which is a Felony 6 which means you get another 12-18 MONTHS.

All sentences are consecutive.

So if you get put away for 90 days on a DUI, and you do that shit, and you end up with three and one-half years after all said & done.

Then when you get out, you get probation which, for a sex charge, is double the time in house, which means you’re on probation for SEVEN years. AND you are forced to register as a sex offender. And THAT is for life.

You sure don’t seem very smart for being a “doctor”, do you?

dave, I think your mommy is calling you in to get ready for school!