Funniest Lines From THE SIMPSONS...

Marge: "Now, homer, I don't want you stalking people! It's sooo Illegal"
Homer: "Alright alright! ..I'm.. just gonna go... out... and.. stalk... Lenny..and..Carl. DOH!"

 

ned's canadian twin: would you like to puff on a reeferino? it's legal here!


(flanders and homer drivin in a snowstorm)
Flanders: homer, we just hit something!
homer: ooh, I hope it was Flanders

 

Homer: I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

 

LOL!! Excellent!
....
Love that saying from Burns he and his ass monkey Smithers were slashed on the net a while back. Ugh. Still having nightmares about that.

 

Townspeople find a MLB satelite that has been monitoring their activity.

Mark McGuire- Do you guys want to hear the awful truth, or do you want to see me hit some dingers?

Crowd- Dingers! dingers! dingers!

(Mark takes out a bat and hits a ball. People cheer. He secretley takes the roll of papers from the broken satellite and puts them under his hat, and says "Yoink")

 

"I AM THE LIZARD QUEEN!" - Lisa after drinking the "water" at Duff Gardens

 

Homer: Oh fine just sue me like everyone else does! The average settlement is $68,000.

 

I dont know about line, but where they had the make up shot gun, that was so freaking funny.

 

"Mmmmm ... floor pie!" ....

*gets snagged by Bart's trap*
"WAAAHHHHHH!!"

 

"i love you beer!!, and I love you Marge, the bringer of beer"

 

(Bart goes into nurse's office)
Bart: Lunchlady Dorris, what are you doing here?
Dorris: Budget cuts, they even got groundskeeper Willie teaching French
(Zoom to classroom)
Willie: Bonnnjjjjjjjour, ya cheese eaten' surrender monkeys.

 

eheh surrender monkeys... great line... willy has a few great insults.

"pulll harder you blouse wearing poodle walker!!!! "

 

"They told me satan would be attractive"

 

"happiness comes in small artificially flavored pellets.....called sprinkles"


though that might be from one of the books....
i think simpsons are the greatest!

 

They are the only show on TV I never miss. Love'em

Comic Book Guy- "Worst Cosmic Wars movie, ever. I will only see it three times, all today"

 

One of the funniest scenes I saw on this show was when Bart switched sheet music in church so that they would sing "The Garden of Eden". The fact that the lady playing the church organ could hardly keep up was funny, but when Homer said, "Hey Marge, do you remember us making out to this Hymn" I fell off the couch laughing. That episode was one of their better ones.

 

i love that part

 

Our progress as a nation can be no swifter than our progress in education. The human mind is our fundemental resource- John Fitzgerald Kennedy


Um, don't ya think it behooves you to spell all the words in a quote about education correctly?

F-U-N-D-A-M-E-N-T-A-L

That sort of inspires me to offer this quote from Homer Simpson:

"Me lose brain?! Uh oh!!"

and this one

"I AM SO SMART! I AM SO SMART! S-M-R-T... I MEAN S-M-A-R-T!"

-Jeffrey

 

I would have to say when Homer was attacked by the bear and he was in the kitchen and knocked down all the groceries and he says "Oh God, they're in our food"

 

i love when Burns has the model plane, the Spruce Moose...

Burns: "C'mon Smithers, we'll take the Spruce Moose....hop in."

Smithers: "heh...but, sir..."

Burns whips out a handgun: "I said, 'hop in.'"