Family is gone: Just bugging out

But all in all, I don't need the hate because i've learnt my lesson... To be honest, in a weird way i'm kind of glad this happened to me... I've always had that "it won't happen to me" mentality and i've always thought of myself as invincible, like i could never die, never get hurt, nothing bad could ever happen. Etc...

Even though this trip was hell, it changed me for the better... This was the first time in my life i've been truly scared, thinking i was going to die, hell i was scared enough to call 911, i would have if i could have gotten the phone. You don't even know how happy i was once the trip ended, it was almost like being reborn (except i felt like shit psychically) but mentally, i was so happy. Life seems to have more value now, knowing i'm not invincible, knowing i can die. To be honest i actually fear death now in a way... I never used to.

But i've learnt my lesson. Not to fuck around with shit thinking it can't harm me, and moderation is key. I'll be taking drugs more seriously from now on.

I think i'm going to smoke one last time tonight, i love smoking when im home alone because it's like there's no paranoia of being caught or anything, and everyone comes back home tomorrow. One last time, i just want to chill, eat this delicious food, listen to some music, watch a movie, then sleep. Then i'm done, i will take a break.

 

did you read every thread this dude[ortus] has posted in?...i have....all the info is not in this thread..it is also spread out in other threads that YOU obviously missed...

.fag move to neg rep me for being rude for reminding ortus[my friend] that life will go on without him and 16 yr old girls tend to just move on to the next guy..

.and because they are not yet fully adult they tend to do it quickly[imo]

if i didnt give a shit about the kid i wouldnt have bothered posting in his thread..


and arent you the dude that claims to have done 15 hits of acid in one shot?...you are not someone that should be listened to or heeded in any way



op-glad you learned your lesson....i didnt make 50 because i was careless with my drug use....living is more important than tripping

 

To all the people saying that Rtus exhibits addictive tendencies, that may be true, and yes I have read the large majority of his posts since he joined, but so do most people. He's obviously not out of control. Jesus, have you ever seen some of the posts from real drug users here? We have a whole community of people who are dependant on opiates. Rtus does not have a problem. I haven't seen any indicator that he's heading in a bad direction. I've seen a lot of posts from him seeking advice and help with confusion in life, which I take as an indicator that Rtus is a smart dude, and wants to do well in life.

I gave out some neg rep because i felt people were being overly harsh. I honestly find no fault with taking ~25mg of 4-aco-dmt. Maybe some of you feel that's morally questionable or indicative of a self destructive lifestyle, but to me it seems like an average dude who's interested in psychedelics, just like me. Just like most of you people. Bad trips can get FUCKING SCARY. Rtus had one of those. I have the utmost sypmathy for him. I don't think he deserves to be told that his girlfriend would run off to another guy if he died, or that hes going to die before the year is up. I don't see any humor in either of those things. They seem more like direct insults to someone who is coming here seeking only condolence and advice, and perhaps reassurance.

And rollingalong, go ahead and disregard my advice because I've taken 15 hits of acid. You show your own ignorance by doing so. As though being a drug user precludes one from the ability to advise another on responsible drug use.

 

I think it's morally questionable because of his general attitude towards drugs, that I have seen time and time again in his previous postings.

I hope this really did change his attitude and understanding of drugs..... but I'm not sure. I mean, this is bad trip number 2.

As for taking a lot of acid making someone discountable, rolling, doesn't having a horrible trip and then doing it again the very next time fall in a somewhat worse catagory? I don't think either is damning, it's all about how you do them.

 

It may just be that you tend to judge people more harshly than i do, but from what I've seen I've never had any reason to suspect that Rtus has a bad attitude towards drugs. I think compared to most people he exhibits a good amount of caution and rational use. I dont think any of us can truly say that weve never taken drugs at the wrong times/for the wrong reasons. I certainly cant. I dont mean for anyone to take that as a direct accusation, i just think that among drug users, most have at one time or another used drugs irresponsibly in one way or another.

I would classify what ive seen from rtus's posts as very moderate drug use. I dont fault anyone for moderate drug use. In fact I applaud rtus for recognizing that he has an addictive personality and actively working to moderate himself. Lots of people never realize it until its far too late.

 

holy shit, glad youre ok.

 

You don't know how relieved I am to read this post. Even though I don't know anything about you you made a good choice. Good luck.

 

so does this mean you accept that it likely was "just" a bad trip?

what was your dose? and how did you measure it??
what salt is it?


it sounds like it was a trip gone wrong mentally, which probably lead to or made worse or helped you imagine things going wrong with your body.

with that said, if this happened to me, i would be much more careful about doing 4acodmt, and yes probably not do it again. but i don't think it was because the chemical went bad or anything like that.

i've heard of people having their vision white-out on mushrooms.

my body was quite shaky and my nose was runny, my eyes welling with tears when i dosed 45 mg fumarate. one of my friends had a seizure type thing on just 30 mg (but that was after LSD and plenty of alcohol).
so i don't think 4acodmt is as "clean" as everyone makes it out to be. seems to show some potential for real danger, but for ME, i think i'm alright with dosing around 35 mg.

and now you have planted another seed of doubt in my head, so i'll be that much more nervous before the next time i eat 4acodmt!
but it's good to post about these horror stories, get all the info out there.

 

Telling me how soon my girlfriend would be banging other guys if i died is an odd way to show how you care, but thank you, i guess lol

But for the record, she's almost 18, not 16... she's only a few months younger than me.

This ^ i'm glad someone else see's me the way i see myself.

I don't get why everyone keeps talking about my lack of respect and attitude towards drugs... I honestly don't get what i've done to make you all think this. The majority of my trips have been about self-exploration, for the most part i go into a trip with the hope of learning something knew.

But yes, there have been a few times, i have tripped simply because i was bored and wanted to see some interesting hallucinations and get that amazing euphoria... but why is that a bad thing? why does that automaticually mean i disrespect drugs?

This is completely different. The first bad trip i had wasn't like this at all, it was just very depressing and dark, i don't think i was ever in any real harm, i it was just a very depressing emotionless trip.

This time on the other hand, was completely different.

I think a lot of you are just looking for excuses to make me seem in the wrong here.

I just meant that what happened to me, could have potentially happened with any other psychedelic i'm sure. Of course it was a bad trip, but i'm still not %100 convinced it was just as simple as that and that i was in no real danger, it's hard to explain, regardless of what i say the majority of you will still think it was all in my head so i'm not going to bother, but what i felt wasn't just me tripping out, as this all happened i had very rational logical thoughts. And it was towards the end of the trip when i wasn't tripping as hard as well.

and my dose was only 25mg like usual, which is what confuses me because that's not very much... so i don't get how my vision being gone could be considered an hallucination because how would 25mg make me halluncate that strongly? And i didn't measure it, i have them all in pre-dosed baggies, which is what i've always had and they've always been fine so i trust it's the correct amount. and i'm unsure of what you mean by "what salt is it?"

But putting fear into peoples head is not what i wanted to do at all, i don't want anyone else having bad trips with this drug, or any drug for that matter. I still think 4-aco-dmt is an amazing drug, and i would recommend it, i just think maybe i've had too much of it and i should personally stop doing it. I do hope to run into a different psycadelic sometime in the future, if i ever have the opportunity to try some acid or actual shrooms, even dmt, i would for sure. But in the future, not now... And as of today, i've officially stopped smoking weed as well, my goal is to go a few weeks...

 

lotsa peeps already gave you the lecture...i like to point out the unthinkable so you will fucking think about it.

.i would fuck my best friends wife right in her ass on his coffin if he let me down by overdosing on some experimental garbage from the internet......

why mince words..

 

Then do you consider mushrooms to be generally as dangerous as this stuff, pork?

I've heard of plenty of people being a bit "punished" for doing things that they should not do with mushrooms or mushroom dosing, but I've never heard of perminant damage. OP's choking scenario is scary, but relatively unique. I suppose the moral is that during psychedelic problems, one should lie on one's side, as when drunk.

OP, yes, I know that you don't get why many people think you're disrespectful with, or don't understand, drugs....... that's exactly the problem, if you got it I'm sure you would think of it differently. I'm not saying you're a bad person or anything, haven't seen anything even close to THAT from you, but it always seems more like you're giving lip service to respecting drugs, actions speak louder than words and opinions about what happened when shit hits the fan can be telling. I've also seen you say lots about weed that made me doubt that you should be smoking at this point in your life, or that you should be smoking heavily.

But again, no judgement on you as a person or anything.

 

What exactly have i said about weed to make you think this? I don't believe i do anything wrong with weed. I'm not even exactly sure how you could 'abuse' weed, of course people smoke weed simply just to get high from time to time.

I'm really sick of people that think taking drugs simply to get high is wrong, you guys need to loosen the fuck up. Don't take shit to seriously. Drugs are meant to be fun, so don't be such a hard ass, and just have fun with them. Yes, responsibility is needed when having this fun, which i have learnt.

But i'm not saying it's good to do this all the time... Especially with psychedelics. But weed? C'mon now... You can't say shit about me smoking weed simply for the sake of getting high and relaxing from time to time...

Of course, that's not the only reason i smoke weed... I smoke weed to help me sleep at night because without it i usually end up laying in bed stairing at the ceiling for hours upon hours... I also use it to eat because i have a very small appetite and get nauseous with food unless i'm baked and get the munchies, then i can eat just about anything, which is good because i need to gain weight... I also use it to relieve stress and pressure that i always have, i don't know why i have it, i just do, i've always had bad anxiety...

And in my opinion, weed is a hell of a lot better at curing those things than some medication is... So, i smoke a lot of weed... So, why don't you think i should be smoking it? I would like to know

 

The things you just said you use weed for are the things that happen when you smoke weed and then don't smoke weed.

Of course I take drugs to get high, why else would I take them?.......

 

Smoke weed every day. :2thumbsup:

 

Now i'm just confused lol, first you say i shouldn't be smoking weed... And now, you're saying i feel like shit because i've stopped smoking weed?

When i don't smoke weed i have no appetite at all, and i wake up pretty much within every hour of the night, and i always have random headaches... But i don't know if that's from not smoking weed, after all, weeds not physically addictive so how could it do that? Maybe i've just always had these issues and weed just helps me get rid of them... But i don't know because i can't remember if this stuff happened before i started smoking weed...

And exactly, that's my point. You said i was disrespectful towards drugs because i take them simply to get high from time to time, but everyone does...

 

weed does produce minor withdrawal symptoms if you smoke it a lot. It may be more psychological than physiological, but the withdrawal is still there. Its really no biggie, but if you are used to smoking before you eat or before you sleep then it makes sense that you would have trouble eating or sleeping when you don't smoke.

But who really cares? The majority of people smoke weed to get high. There's nothing wrong with that. Weed has a million wonderful medicinal properties, but I hate it when people say "Oh, I need weed because of this medical condition, blah blah..."

Sure, it helps a ton of medical conditions but lets just face the facts....the majority of people just enjoy getting stoned.

Don't let people make you feel bad about smoking weed. That's just silly.

 

Yes this makes sense, I always smoke weed right before eating a meal, and right before going to bed, and also just random times throughout the day, so it's very different now that i've stopped. And it's only been day 2 of not smoking, so I'm sure it'll all go back to normal within a few days or so, so it's all good...

 

because people tend to get their asses handed to them when they trip just for the hell of it. it's hard to differentiate when i personally am tripping for the hell of it or for a more "legitimate" reason.

when i have tripped for the hell of it, i have had bland, uninspiring trips sometimes, not trainwrecks...but that seems to be when trainwrecks occur.

i'm not saying you are guilty of anything that i am not also guilty of

dude, you are being ridiculous. you would butt-fuck your best friend's wife...ON HIS COFFIN, just because he overdosed on drugs? some friend you must be...

4acodmt doesn't equal 'experimental garbage from the internet,' it is a quality psychedelic. all research chemicals are not created equal. do some research before you go around spewing bullshit from your mouth please

lots of people get LSD "from the internet"
some people even get cannabis that way. what does that have to do with anything?

i'm not really sure. i guess i'd say no...
it's probably a lot easier to take too much of a relatively pure chemical powder than it is to take too many mushrooms. i doubt i will ever eat more than 4 or 5 grams of mushrooms at once.

i feel like my 45 mg trip on 4acodmt fumarate was not quite as intense of a trip as i've had on an eighth of potent mushrooms, but it felt a little dangerous (the shaking, the mucous production).


ortus, 4acodmt can come as "freebase" (not a salt form), "fumarate" or "HCl" (two salts of 4acodmt)

HCl is more potent than fumarate, because HCl weighs less than fumarate. that means 4acodmt HCl is more 4acodmt molecules than an equal weight of 4acodmt fumarate.

if your friend or someone scaled out 25 mg doses for you, it's quite possible he fucked up a little.

 

I agree

How do you know the person who gave you this stuff weighed it out properly? Most people don't even own a milligram scale... Sure, you could use a scale which reads to the hundredths place, but even then it will only measure increments of 100mg (probably not super accurately either, idk)..

If you've ever tried to eye out, say, a 10mg dose and then actually weigh it on a scale, you'd probably be surprised... I find it relatively hard to guesstimate milligrams. Not to mention there's the obvious fact that different substances have different densities and consistencies, therefore complicating the whole "eyeballing" process even further...

My initial thought when I first read this was that it was an issue concerning dose.. Took too much and got your ass handed to you. Very well could be the case

 

i would suggest when doing this again. to taste 3mg first , give yourself 15min, and take the rest. this allows a little lag in sudden effect. sure have some balls and take 20mg all at once. This is not magic mushrooms. this is instant magic mushrooms. body dont need to process anything to get the actives and you get ZOOOOM in less than 40min. This is enough to scare anyone. but this compound is rather safe when consumed properly and not some hero shit.
youll still trip well spacing the dose out. Dont try to be a bad ass in a hurry and taking it all at one.