Anti-Male Bias all around us.

so you suck dick, jahryn?

 

he'd probably be a lot happier if he did. then he wouldn't have the sexual frustration to go along with his social frustration. fucking someone who's existance you're totally against must cause a fierce conflict within a person.

 

I'm seeing some personal attacks coming from you as well as disrespect for a moderator. My gut feeling tells me you couldn't care less about what I think and I anticipate the requisite "they attacked me first" whine which suggests to me that this post is a waste and you should be given a vacation but I'm giving you the benefit of the tiniest of doubts here and, regardless of what you think other people are doing, please be respectful.

To other people dishing out petty insults, please refrain from doing so as it only brings you down to the level of what you abhor. This needs to be a place where anyone can safely voice their opinion (as long as that opinion is not calculated to attack or belittle anyone else) and in return they should feel safe that they will not be attacked. This is all I am going to post on the subject of personal attacks here. Thank you in advance for returning to a renewed civility in this lively debate.

 

you're right. it's just so tempting when you're slapped in the face to spit in their eye. i can only behave for so long, i guess. i'll try to be better.

 

I just asked an honest question. :tongue:

 

Now I haven't even read past this page of this thread, so feel free to attack me for that. But what a shitty thing to say.

 

It's quite alright. I can't reasonably expect people to act out of character and we do have a right to defend ourselves. However, I see no positive outcome in further engagement in this sidebar as all sides have made pretty clear where they are coming from and anything else would be calculated to escalate matters and provoke a negative response not to mention drag the thread further off topic.

There's bias all around us- you can find anti- just about any group if you look hard enough. The bias will still lurk in peoples' minds whether or not we insist they repress it and in all likelihood forcing people into censoring what they say will deepen their prejudices and increase general tension... it's a major issue I have with the politically correct stupidity that seeks to censor society-- that some people have nothing better to do than to make it their point to take offense at what another says. Attempting to repress and silence a prejudiced person will almost certainly never inspire them to open their mind. It can only set them deeper into their mindset.

More often than not the best retort to hate speech is complete silence. Those with intelligent, open minds will see it for what it is without help from anyone interpreting it. Bigotry and hatred are their own most effective rebuttals if left undignified by any response.

 

Okay... fair enough. Please answer me this- in all honesty, what kind of response did you anticipate asking it? What would the agenda of a respondent whose question was aimed at assailing a man's masculinity? Surely he did enough damage to his own without your help!

This is just one reason that we don't allow personal attacks- even on someone who a consensus might determine deserves them. It degrades the integrity of the forum and can have a repressive effect on someone else's willingness to speak freely and honestly. Free speech doesn't mean say whatever you want without regard to the consequences. It DOES mean that within a discussion anyone should feel safe expressing a dissenting view without fear of being personally attacked. In such an environment, launching personal attacks from anyone is highly inappropriate and I'm sure not at all what Skip envisioned when he provided these forums for everyone to use, including our friend, Jharyn.

 

you're may be right, though i was having a philisophical moment based on an honest assessment of his vicious response to women he doesn't agree with. being called a leaky tampon doesn't inspire anyone to kindness.

 

in my own defense, though, i was attacked viciously and personally many times and attacked back. i'm not even close to a saint, and i suppose our friend jharyn's behavior on here does beg an honest question: is anti-male bias purely a construct of women, or reaction of women too long bullied to certain vicious men? does it do the men's right's movement any good at all for bullies to remain bullies? male or female, vicious is vicious.

 

Good point.

A former co-worker and one of the smartest people I have ever encountered put it well when he pointed out in a conversation about another co-worker that no one really has anything to bitch about that they didn't in one way or another bring onto themselves.

Life is the ultimate uneven playing field and the healthiest way to attack it is to play the hand you've been dealt and find happiness in your own circumstances. Complaining endlessly about all that is unfair isn't likely to inspire any real sympathy.

I'm willing to wager that the bias that Jharyn has experienced was in one way or another perpetuated by the very attitude he has chosen to display here.

 

Sure, there is anti-male bias in some things. Certainly, its easier to find anti-female bias all around us. I think a lot of things are just anti-human. But I feel very privelaged to be a tall white male, and if/when I am discriminated against its never enough for me to bitch about it. Just about everyone else in the world has it worse.

 

i agree. and my own bulldog nature tends to brng on the bulls. i've been trying really hard not to be such a bulldog, but damn, it's a long hard habit to breat.

jharyn, if you're willing to bury the hatchett, i sure as hell am. i know you're furious, and i can't entirely blame you. there's a few hard core feminists i wouldn't mind seeing in a ball gag because they do more harm to the human race than good. i'm prickly, i'm thin skinned, but i'm aware of my faults. i'd rather find a detante and understanding than another enemy to flog.

 

Don't worry KC... we like you as the combative person you are. You have the ability to take people out of their comfort zones and that forces thought... sometimes for the better and sometimes not.

 

i'm glad it has some purpose. i feel like dr. jeckel and mr. hyde most of the time. thanks, stink. that made me feel really good.

 

i feed no ego except mine, and being called a "boy" and a "pussy" are quite laughable right now, because it just makes me feel so much better about myself - it reaffirms that i live to no ones standards but my own. if anyone is biased, its you. you're blind, and lack any logic whatsoever - so just keep on babling and babling

 

yea kind of strange to complain about "anti male bias" and then go calling every guy on the forum a pussy...This guy just has some esteem issues or something.

 

I can't actually believe tha this fucking thread is going on.

It's cunts like you Jharyn that give the hardcore feminists reason to think that most men are ignorant bully boys with nothing else to do other than belittle women.

Get a fucking life. Grow up. Take a look at yourself, please. And then ask yourself about why this anti-male bias exists. You are part of the cause, not the solution.

 

Hey,

I want to apologize to all of you here.

I was in the middle of WWIII in court with my ex again. She was in clear violation the a court order and listening to the judge do absolutely nothing again, as they have all been doing for the last 14 years, got the better of me.

However, that is no excuse for my lack of etiquette as well as my complete disregard for another persons opinion in the course of a discussion. My messages were lost in a spiraling hateful tirade that was completely unjustified. I'm better then that and I know it. The lack of respect and common decency is becoming uncommon in our society and my feeding that monster is really not what I am all about.

I truly, with all my heart, apologize to everyone here. I was going to send individual messages to people but feel that since I was the one to bring this to a public forum, a public apology was needed.

I am going to continue to back away from the keyboard for a little while longer. I have a yoga practice that is doing wonders for me and a meditation routine that is doing even more. I have a few things I'd like to post in the men's issues forum but want to get the beyond the animosity that has been getting in the way of my own wellbeing first.

Again, to everyone here. I truly apologize for my outbursts and can honestly say that I am not that type of person. I hope you can all give me the opportunity to show you that. But, if you cannot offer me that opportunity, I will understand.

Namaste

 

i'm really sorry you had to go through that and i can see how it can make all that anger come out sideways. i appreciate your apology and hope you'll accept my own. i know how i am, i know how i get; therefore i am biologically incapable of holding a grudge, and i really hope the best for you. i hope we can have some better, less cranky talks in the future. i'm really not so bad, i promise.