An extremely difficult problem I need help with - not a 'whine' but simply a petition

I called you ignorant because you were ignorant (that is, not completely aware of...) MY situation. I was using it in the true sense of word. I am not being picky. Many low-skill jobs you are talking about are VERY physically demanding and require incredible patience and the ability to work long long hours. As I indicated, all of these things are a problem because of my disability. It is not as though I am being like a spoiled rich child who doesn't want to get their hands dirty haha.

 

I'm sorry but that is a bit how you're coming across here.

 

^^i would have to agree.

there are probably MILLIONS of college graduates who can't find work in their field. that is the very reason why graduate school is so popular.

reading this has reminded me of critics of the occupy movement. they think it's a bunch of kids with degrees, that are above working a shit job.

it does suck, and it isn't fair that after getting a degree, you might have to take a job that only requires a high school diploma, but it's reality.

sorry about your situation dude. i hope for the best for you.

 

I can see why you may think I am being a "spoiled kid" but honestly unless you have tried to work while on strong antipsychotics and four other sedating psychiatric medications, while simultaneously suffering from Schizoaffective Disorder, you don't have room to talk. It adds a HUGE difference into th equation.

 

In fact, before I was put on the antipsychotic drugs, I DID have jobs at shitty positions. I worked at a steel mill for two summers in college which is arguably one of the hardest jobs physically. Unfortunately, I had to quit my third summer of college because I fell asleep on the job and made major mistakes because of the medications.

 

For example, I would work as a bank teller to get my foot in the door. However, I would have a serious issue with standing for many hours on end. I doubt they woud accommodate me by giving me a fucking stool...

And I would get extremely exhausted quicker than other employees. Would they give me a 'special break'? I doubt that too. These are the things that worry me about such entry level positions. It is not that I don't like them. It is simply that my frail and ravaged body (from the years of high doses of antipsychotics) can't perform to the level of the average young man in his 20s. Suggestions?

 

You could always approach the interview positively but lay those cards on the table at the onset...... Also, seek out a smaller local bank, you'll never get anywhere with a big national bank. I know my local bank does have one teller that is over weight and she has a stool to sit on when she needs it...... She doesn't always sit but it's made available for her, she's also not in her 20's. I'm also pretty sure that the ones that work the drive through here are always sitting..... (drive through is separate from the bank, not within the bank like it is at some branches)

One thing about any position, even if you have a disability (or especially if you have one) you have to go in there with a positive attitude. Despite your limitations, show them how those limitations can be worked around and you still get the job done. Otherwise they are not going to be interested.

 

Heyyyy ... spolied rich childs have their issues too, ya know? So don't be so down on them. OK??

I appreciate where you're coming from though, about ppl not understanding what it's like to be on meds. It's tough, and that's no joke.

Employers have their own issues, though ... as you'll appreciate. The steel mill ... they can't afford to have ppl falling asleep on the job. It's just dangerous for everyone. And is I read your posts, you understand and accept that.

The challenge is to find something where your condition isn't a deal-breaker. I can't help you directly - but I do wonder whether the answer might be a job-sare with somebody else who, for whatever reason, couldn't manage a full-time full intensity job. Between the two of you, it might be possile to give full-time effective cover to the post. I don't know how realistic an aspiration that is. Here in the UK we hear lots of TALK of such arrangements, but you hardly ever encounter one. Bu tit can't cost anything to explore the possibility, can it? :mickey:

 

Does your condition qualify you as a bona fide Disabled Person? There are laws against discriminating on the basis of various attributes that include disability. If it takes a few reasonable accommodations, such as having a stool instead of standing, but you're otherwise able to do the job, companies are forbidden to discriminate. Contact your local EEOC office for more information.

You've talked about being stressed by interpersonal situations, yet you seem to have handled criticism in this thread quite well. Maybe you couldn't be a high school teacher, but could you handle a one-on-one teaching situation, such as in a tutoring program? If so you might check with high schools to see if they have a formal program of that type and need tutors. You might even check advertisements by private parties looking for tutors.

I'm just wondering...have you done any research into qualifying for an actuarial job? I don't know much about it, except that it's a highly mathematically oriented profession, but practical rather than theoretical.

Those are a few thoughts off the top of my head...

 

Yes. I am officially disabled according to the Social Security Administration. That is why I receive SSI supplementary income which keeps me from having to be homeless. But I don't feel "right" being on welfare even though I realize that it is made FOR people like me. But the stigma is so bad in the USA because of all the scammers out there.

I have considered a tutoring position. It is one of the few things I have really thought about. As for actuary work, I would need to be able to be alert for a full time job before I could do that. Perhaps in time as my meds were adjusted, I could handle an eight hour per day work load, but right now, I could not stay awake that long. It is a good idea though!

 

I just discovered that another nearby university, West Chester University of Pennsylvania, offers a small program for a Master's in Mathematics. There is no Ph.D. Program there. From what I gather, since Univeristy of Delaware is a research hub and offers a prestigious Ph.D., the classes are insanely hard. That would explain why I couldn't cut it there- I was in an internationally selective doctoral program to obtain a Master's degree.

I think that since West Chester is not well known and only offers the Masters, that I might be able to succeed there as I failed at Delaware. I looked at their course descriptions and their HIGHEST level classes were pre-requisites to even get into Delaware haha. Since all I want to do is teach undergraduate math, which only requires a Master's, I might just go to West Chester, work part time as a tutor, snag my degree and then finally be able to realize my life dream- to teach full time at a college.

What do you all think?

 

That sounds very positive, et! Definitely worth checking into - hope it works out!

 

If anyone could direct me to that office environment with little stress I'd be most grateful.

 

The more I think about this whole thing, the more bitter I get. One of the main problems is that the people who have minor success that are my age or a bit older stop at NOTHING to chastise people like me as being a lazy whiner who never worked a day in their life. That is a major over-generalization and it needs to stop.

Sure, a good number of privileged children go to college and do absolutely nothing noteworthy the entire four years (or more) that they are there. HOWEVER, I know quite a few people like myself who actually worked their FUCKING asses off for four long, miserable years in college to obtain the "good" "useful" diplomas (ie- math, chemistry, physics). Yet, what happens? We still can't get a job. So to all of you people calling me (and my peers) out for being lazy, you need to watch your mouths. I fucking HATED college. All I did was school-work. I didn't do any partying or anything fun at all. It was dry, boring, and irritating, full of UN-obtainable expectations put onto you COMBINED with an excessive motto of "After these four miserable years, you will be free to have a GOOD job that doesn't make you want to shoot yourself in the temples every night". But, alas. That never happened, did it!?

They never told me that you basically need to get a fucking PH.D. in order to get one of those "good" jobs out there. And guess what, I was genetically FUCKED OVER to inherit my family's curse of severe, crippling mental illness that prohibited me from getting that Ph.D. degree (although, like I said on the first page, I DID get accepted to graduate school).

I know life isn't fair, but damn, I have been running this shit through my head for three or four YEARS now and have spent probably close to 200 HOURS in therapy talking about this shit, and guess what? I still feel bitter and pissed about it. So what the hell am I supposed to do??!!

I just feel like I will NEVER be able to have a sense of financial INDEPENDENCE and STABILITY in my life despite my inherent intelligence which, in the old days, would allow me to exceed in the job market. I mean, logistically, how the fuck am I ever supposed to start a family when I can't afford to live on my own (let alone BUY an actual home)?

Is anyone else as pissed off about this as me? And if not....why?! You should be!

 

I can't imagine that integrating psychedelics into your regimen is helping your situation much. How about cutting out your recreational use for about a year then see how you're handling your necessary meds and other miscellaneous responsibilities?

 

How bout I mention that I took a medium dose of the psychedelic called 2C-I ONCE in the last eight months. I don't know if you have ever heard of the term "ad hominem" or "red herring" but you have just committed both. You have attempted to diminish my argument by introducing an aspect of my personal life that you find objectionable (for reasons I really don't know- my one psychedelic experience was extremely soothing to my personality in fact). By red herring, that means that you are intentionally swaying my decidedly directed conversation into a pointless path in order to get me to shut up basically.

I will have you know, also, that I am probably one of the most dedicated psychiatric patients out there. I take every single dose of the mind-numbing and stupifying pills that I am prescribed, even though it makes me sleep 12 hours per day, robs me of every shred of motivation, reduces my interest in sex to less than that of a 90 year old man, and robs me of my dignity in many other ways. I have never missed a scheduled psychiatric or psycho-therapeutic doctor's appointment in the 12 years that I have been plagued by my illness.

I think that you are somehow assuming the old stereotypical assumption: When the "mentally ill person" shows a little anger or frustration, it MUST be their illness talking. They CERTAINLY don't have a right to feel any sort of emotions whatsoever. Let's NOT LISTEN TO THEM and just poke fun at their retched condition in back handed ways.

Listen, I am not acting like a fool or crack-pot. I am in a genuinely precarious situation in my life when it comes to my financial future (both short and long term). I think, as a human being, I have the right to RAISE my voice...mentally ill or not...

There is something terribly wrong with the hardships me and my fellow 20-somethings are facing. YES...many of us are lazy and LOVE to mooch off of their parents. BUT, there are a sizable number of us, myself included, who simply want a fair shake of things and worked hard (as much as we could at least) every chance we got.

I still am a bit creeped out that you would even think to look at my profile page for "bait" to attack me with. That is just low in every sense of the word. It really is. Now, please, let's get back to the real discussion. This red-herring has seen its day.

 

How awful for you. The whole thing, my head is done in for you, if i lived near you i would say come and live with me, i will look after you. Get the legal reality as your friends say. Or run an ad and sublet for more? Could you make a few bucks out of the tragedy? Could this glass appear half full? I wish you luck in your life. I really do hope it all works out. lots of love and hugs and how great you are to have done so well so far with such a debilitating disease. You shine in many ways. Good luck.

 

Thank you for your kind words. I hope things work out too.

 

You are assuming that I find your drug use objectionable. I don't. But when one presents with a condition like Schizoaffective Disorder it might be useful to look at all things one takes into ones body that will affect the mind. This includes diet. I was citing a recent post to help illuminate the possibility (not necessarily fact) that you may not be helping your situation.

Unfortunately you chose to take something that isn't convenient to what you're apparently unwilling to consider and call it a personal attack. That's a shame because it suggests you might not have a completely open mind.

My intent was to try to help you explore all possible ways of mitigating your situation and minimize the effects it has on your ability to concentrate and stamina you have for standing for long periods of time- useful in holding down certain jobs. This could have the desired effect of requiring less special considerations that you'd feel necessary to present a potential employer and help your chances of gaining an income that would enable you to get ahead.

I do hope you can resolve the issues- whether or not it involves altering your recreational psychedelic and drug use.

 

I have two kids with mental illness - a 24-year-old stepdaughter and a 16-year-old daughter. Both of them started having major symptoms around the age of 12.

The older one was repeatedly hospitalized for a few years. Her doctors couldn't find effective meds for her, so she was chronically out of control. We had the police out to our house on a regular basis to help us deal with her. Our family became a regular topic in the daily staff meetings of the city police. We tried and tried to get the state to help us by taking her into a facility that was staffed to deal with cases like hers, but we never got any help. We spent $14,000 to send her to a therapeutic behavior mod wilderness camp. The mental health providers there had so much trouble controlling her that they almost gave up and sent her back home. However she was better after the camp, so I'm grateful we could manage it, though we had to go into debt for it. At age 19 she started becoming delusional, and was committed by a court to the state hospital. She spent over a year there before she was stabilized on meds, then she spent almost two years at a group home.

Now she's happy and productive for the first time in all these years. She's waiting tables, earned her EMT certificate, and is working toward paramedic certification. She sells her paintings, she's writing a book, and she's working on an Internet business with a friend. She could not have done it without the right regimen of medications, and she's way behind her peers, age-wise, even though she's very bright and capable - cuz the illness ate her life, to a major extent.

My younger daughter has not attended school for this entire school year, cuz she gets freaked out by the other kids at the high school, and nobody can MAKE her go there. The school finally sent some tutors to help her outside the school, and she's good with that. We're looking at possible residential placement at a school for psychiatrically challenged kids. Yet, even as badly off as she is, she is currently MUCH better off than the first time she was hospitalized at age 12. I still cry a little when I remember that night, talking to her while she was curled up defensively in her bed, trembling, her face wet with tears of terror and despair, telling us that she had tried to kill herself. Though now 16, she still hasn't completed an entire year of high school work. She has a long, hard road ahead of her.

People who have never lived with this sort of thing tend to have difficulty comprehending. It's not a matter of pulling oneself up by one's bootstraps. Without special medication and lots of support, people like my daughters would end up homeless or dead. WITH the right support, they can become contributing members of society. But it's much harder for them to do so than it is for "normal" people. And we need to cut them some slack.

The older girl gets SSI for her disability. And I say it's about fucking time the COMMUNITY that ignored our hardship for years finally offered some help. People need to be educated about the realities of mental illness. You and I and my daughters are helping with this.