ranting is good, a way to release emotion. you are right though this isn't a poem. if you want to take it and make it a poem than find some...
so don't worry about the form? the best part of this one is capturing the connection between "dreamers" and the "candle" at the end. It is...
nice, I looked up the pronounciation/meaning of bodhisattvas. I see the construction of 5/5/3/5... but not familiar with that. There is...
One thing that I've always struggled with in my poetry, is which person to write in. Whether to write as you have here, or in first person. I...
I like this, but I still wanted to play with the order. One thing that I did think needed to change, is the word frozen in the beginning......
I wasn't sure the order works... I wanted to drop the first three lines completely. I would like: "One last shout" to be the first line of this...
I like the visuals of the first line regarding the muse, it was impressive. The last line wasn't as strong. Keep writing and sharing.
Seeds For awhile, I’ve been lying outstretched on this mountain. Heels digging into its hard-packed earth, fingers holding its scraggly grass....
Again, you have the ending deep and so that works well, to end with a deep/excellent thought... a zinger if you want to call it that. you could...
a couple of your poems have this little bonus toward the end. It's always good to have the "deepest" part of the poem toward the end.
This is very nice prose poetry... I like your point of writing as healing. Don't we all get started that way? I just read a lot of Pellinore's...
i can feel this one as if i was right there standing on the shore looking at it with you. very nice, as always,
Pellinore, today I've been reading your poetry posts and I have to say I think you have some amazing qualities in your writing. A job is a job is...
Matter Behold the woman, work of fine art embraced by canvas. Loved forevermore tendered tresses contemplated mouth perfectly still. Why,...
I really like this poem, the feeling it gives you - the coldness of it. I would drop the first line completely since your title says it for you,...
okay, I see how I confused it. Not sure what to suggest to bring that thought through in it... perhaps by removing the word "to" from in front...
an observation... on one part of this in hopes that it helps your thoughts on building this poem (and other poems)... after retreating back to...
I like the premise, the wind as breath of mankind... inhale, exhale, a big huge sigh... "whines and pleas of the distressed human race". I like...
Autumn Leaves, the leaves those leaves… thick crispness upon the earth’s head a crinkle of a hat, delicious to the feet children, and dogs…...
I like the title, but you know me... I cut, cut, cut... I would just use "Harvest".... I liked earlier version... but slopes and fields switched...
Separate names with a comma.
