Hey everyone, I'm looking for your perspective on something that means a lot to me. Please if you read this give me your opinion of what is going on and what i should do. Well ever since me and this girl met, we've been hanging out constantly and texting and calling each other a lot. We started out so well the first couple of weeks into knowing her i asked her if anything was going on between us. I didn't want to play any mind games and was going for the truth. It turned out nothing was going on between us and she just wants to have fun and not have a relationship. Well that was a couple of weeks ago and now we kind of have something physical going on between us now. Two days ago we were drinking and laying in my bed together, put two and two together and we were all over each other. We made out and almost had sex. Then yesterday the same thing happened almost. We were in the back of her car cuddling kind of and kissing and we almost had sex again. When we start kissing its more like we kiss once or twice and she pulls away. Then today she came over and we were laying in my bed watching t.v. and she started cuddling up close to me and we kissed a little, she kissed me a couple of times and started pulling away and facing the t.v. Then she left to go return something to Target and came back, when she came back we kissed a little more and got into a more passionate kiss and that lasted a couple of minutes and then she said she had to go. I'm starting to get feelings for her again and i'm not sure what to do. I can't tell her again or that will be really awkward and will fuck everything up. I don't know what is up with her pulling away and stopping all the time, is that supposed to be a message or something? Should i take a break from being around her? Maybe not talk to her on the phone tonight or hang out with for a little? Advice would be appreciated, thanks.
Hi, .. I would like to get an idea of your age although as long as you are 18 I am allowed to talk to you about it. I can see why you are concerned and likely pretty frustrated. You asked for honesty and I am going to give you that. As I was reading your post several things seemed odd to me. The 1st thing was definately the pulling away thing. I thought that perhaps she doesn't like your kissing. Could that be the issue? The only other reasons I know of that could mean would be she is scared and is unsure of letting go of her feelings for you, or she is bored to tears with the foreplay and wants some action. You say you"almost" had sex. Well why did you not have it and what exactly is almost. Did you touch each other in a under the clothes and up in that thang type fashion or was it only a bit of touching. Its obvious that she either is wanting to have sex with you or she cares about you and is fighting it. Find out if she wanys sex... and if she likes how uyou kiss her or if she is simply really falling for you too! The only way to please her is to know what it is she truly wants. The best way to get the truth though is by giving her no reason to go on the defensive. In other words your approach should give her no reason to feel like she must lie. ie: Babe, I have been doing some thinking about the last couple times we spent together, and I noticed you pulling away from me. I want to know if I am maybe kissing you too hard or too soft or whatever, cuz I do want to make you weak at the knees with my kisses and I am a fast learner! " Something like that will give her a clear avenue for truth because you have said that if you are not doing it right ... you want to fix it!! If its not that her reaction will tell you the truth anyway. Also to bring up the sex thing vs real emoytional love coming on thing... Is something you must figure out to protect your own heart. If she says its not your kissing causing her to pull away than you should absolutely try and determine if you have gone to slow for her . Say something like " Have you thought we have taking things too slow or too fast as far as sex is concerned?" Tell her you are nervous that she may not want to but that she is so hot and so hard to resist that maybe it would help you deal with things if you knew what was acceptable and what isn't. Make sure you tell her the hot part so she is aware its been a struggle to resist her ... (she'll like that) but also that you are willing to respect her wishes at this point. Talk to her .. she and she alone holds the answers you are looking for . Always in any type of relationship.. The answer is open honest communication!! Good luck!
It isn't my kissing. I'm a good kisser, most people actually tell me so. I don't think its the foreplay that is boring her, maybe i should step it up a little? We almost had sex, i didn't have a condom and i couldn't get in her. She was tight and we were both kind of drunk. She tried as well, no success. Yeah we touched each other. She gave me a hand job and i was down her pants, i fingered her.
