Would you hookup with an attached person?

I'm married, curious and might have done things different if I had my time over.

Do people here hookup with attached people?
Would you?
Could you?
Maybe, if they were hot?
It's their life and you don't mind if they chose to stray?

I don't care if people are against it but I'm wondering how many feel that it's ok if it's discrete or states an itch and the feeling is mutual or the hookup is just fair play

 

In my experience most of the guys I hook up with are either married or if in a same sex relationship either are cheating or else tell me they have an open relationship or a 'no-tell' arrangement.

And while I certainly would not want to damage any relationship there is a reason why they are going outside their relationship which is their affair and not for me to make a moral judgement on IMO.

If nobody strayed from their relationship there would sure be a dearth of profiles on the hookup/dating sites!

In any case I am not convinced that lifelong committment to one other fits most of us; and people change over time. Not so many species? in the animal kingdom remain monogamous.

Simon

 

Most men I've been with are married, so . . . .yes

 

98% of the many men I've had sex with were married. I've had flings with a handful of women and all of them were married. It's not my place to say anything. We're both there for the same thing so it's never bothered me. If the significant other wasn't depriving them of their sexual desires we'd never had met.

 

I'm married and have absolutely no problem "hooking up" with another married man who's wife doesn't know about her husband's desires. I figure he doesn't want to get caught anymore than I do.

 

They always are. Women and men. I prefer because they have to be discrete and less likely to turn into a stalker. Also adds spice.

 

I have a personal ethic not to have any kind of sex with anyone who is attached, for the same reason that I didn't cheat on the one girlfriend I've had since discovering my bisexuality 29 years ago, even though I couldn't stop thinking about sex with guys for the three years we were together, especially during the rocky times (actually, I kind of cheated on her online, writing in forums like this or texting/emailing with guys on gay/bi hookup sites, which was not good). I just don't want to risk being the cause of anyone's suffering. I can barely stand even imagining the pain a partner feels when finding out. It would just shatter their universe. At least that's the case in my own personal world (everyone's world is different).

I've even said no a number of times to playing with a man and woman or two men in a threesome or with a single person that is in an open relationship with their partner. I believe there is still some underlying pain and jealousy there, even if they are consciously unaware of it. I have a therapist friend of mine who confirms this with patients of hers in open relationships, where only in therapy they end up realizing that there is actually pain there.

Anyway, this is just a personal choice of mine, and I'm not meaning to pass judgement on anyone. To each his or her own. It's just not for me, though that really limits my possible partners, especially in the bisexual male population: I find the vast majority of guys in gay sex venues, like bathhouses, gay sex clubs, arcades, gay orgies, etc., all of which I used to do a lot of, and on gay hookup sites are bi and married. I don't go even go to sex venues anymore because it's really hard to ensure a guy is single; plus I just want the greater intimacy in more personal get-together's with single guys in each other's homes.

 

I would only hookup with someone who is attached if everyone involved knew what was going on and was good with it.

 

Yes … my ideal: a happily married, fit, professional gentleman that would enjoy an occasional rendezvous with a versatile male FWB.

 

Lots of us are looking for that.

 

I prefer married men as they are very discrete as I am. Back in my forties I regularly sucked off a neighbour that never got a blowjob from his wife and not much sex. He told me his marriage was better because of regular blowjobs from me.

 

I am married and have never been with a guy but in recent years thanks, in large part, to these forums, I like the idea of a male FWB. I have a couple fellas I regularly sext with which is a lot of fun since I enjoy showing off a bit. Not sure that it would ever move past this but if it did, the discretion would be key. It feels less like straying somehow, and I know that makes no sense. Trying to get my member credentials here so maybe I meet more fun pen pals!

 

A couple of guys I've been with have told me this too. Understandable - takes the stress off. And I like the fact that I'm satisfying them.

 

I only suck DL married men and, as I live in a tourist area, I have a preference to blow visitors to the area.

 

I feel very fortunate that my wife knows, in fact she set it up for me.

 

I was a closeted cock sucker for about 15 years during my first marriage. My present wife knows and supports my desires for cock and life has been much more enjoyable these past 10 years.

 

That is so great that your wife supports that you enjoy sucking cock.

 

I pretty much only hook up with guys who are partnered in one way or another. The theory is that they too have too much to lose and would be more cautious and discreet with who they have sex with. I'd like to remain std free and discreet.

 

I agree which is why 99% of the men I've had sex with were all married to women not wanting to carry something home.

 

So I put ads up on DoubleList the past couple of days. The responses were vastly uninspiring.

One guy seemed like a good candidate but he never showed up. I can’t believe how dry it is right now of worthwhile cock to suck.