Wife Swapping In A Marriage Good Idea?

Wow...I think I would move. That would suck to live like that, hiding, worrying...that is not a good way to live.

 

nope not for me

 

Im highly skeptical anytime anyone says stuff like 'completely honest' and im not talking about you, those kind of phrases pop up all the time in related threads on the internet

We are completely honest, we have complete trust etc etc. But that kind of talk always comes AFTER that other couple has been chosen

The wife beforehand has decided the other woman isnt betting looking, skinnier or younger than her without communicating that in anyway to her husband....then AFTER that, then they have wonderful communication, trust and honesty

Mmmmmm hmmmmmm

The swinging thing for the most part doesnt even seem to happen till after the early to late 20s breeding frenzy, once most of them are past that 7 year itch, comfortable enough with each other to know they can stay companions but also bored of each other not to care so much about jealousy

 

And PS: None of you have any idea what your husbands really get up to

 

Yessss

Because gay people just really represent that small half a percent at either end of whichever spectrum or evolutionary principle you are looking at

You know the type, the lesbian couple that always stays home with the four dogs dont really bother with anyone else, the gay guys with the bowtie that are 50 and still live with their mom. A lot more to do with asexual than homosexual, just that everyone else assumes othèrwise becuase they never see whats missing

 

What?

 

PS - I know everything he does.

 

To where? I don't know of a place that is completely without conservatives, especially in the business world. Even the online version of the New Orleans newspaper often has some socially conservative comments posted under the stories, supposedly from local people. WTF is a moral conservative doing living in New fucking Orleans? It's like the capital city of American hedonism!

My friends and I have always known how to keep things under the radar. There are morally liberal people everywhere too.

The other wife is a cute little airhead blond, just the opposite of the type that my husband goes for in serious, long term relationships. I'm not stupid.

And the problem is... ?

 

Thank you!

 

Yeah, I'd do it. Almost did once (I did my part), but the wife backed out.

 

Lol. So you stuck it in another woman then even though your wife wasn't so sure? Give this bloke a fucken MacDonalds award.

 

I agree even in a strong relationship. At one point one partner will eventually have enough while the other will continuously want the "extra" relationship to endure, then the problems arise.

 

My wife was fine with me going ahead -- the other couple were, and still are, long term (30+ years) friends. But she and the other man decided they wouldn't. He know all about it, too, and didn't have a problem.
So no one else does either.

 

Phil (Hubby) & I had no real issues differentiating between love & lust. We only really swung with one other couple for a four year period between early 2002 & mid 2006 when the wife in the other couple was diagnosed with breast cancer. As you can imagine, that quickly killed any thoughts of continuing with the relationship! However, during that period we not only became incredibly close to the other couple (you would have to really!) Phil & I became even closer to each other. We always viewed it as giving one another the gift of pleasure. Physical pleasure. The love part stayed inside just the two of us when we were fucking with the other couple.
As many have mentioned in this thread, it can only work if there is a truly strong foundation to the relationship between the two of you to start with, you both have to want to try this, then the trick is to find another couple who share the same values & goals. We were lucky, we found such a couple, for a while the four of us enjoyed some truly wonderful moments. The other thing to bear in mind, do everything together. No wandering off to have sex in private with the other partner, as that way lurks mistrust & doubt. After all, it's the watching & sharing that makes the sex so good, why would you want to be so secretive about it?!

 

I'm struggling with why you ended a relationship with somebody because they were diagnosed with breast cancer. I understand it may have killed the mood so to speak, but you word it like you were worried you were going to catch it from her. I'd be pretty upset if I lost friendship so abruptly because I was diagnosed with something that would only effect me. Were you there for her, at least, as a supporting friend?

 

I didn't take it that way when I read her response. I took it that they ended the swinging part of the relationship. I would imagine that in addition to being sick from treatment that quite possibly losing a breast would make the other woman not real confident or really into sex at all for quite some time. She would have to start over with her own husband and see how comfortable she is after the changes.

The other thing is that if the relationship was based on meeting the other couple specifically for sex, there may not have been a lot of hanging out together just being friends to begin with. If I had swinger friends that I met online, I would feel pretty awkward bringing them around my family or other gatherings. It may have been mutual to end the relationship all together.

 

It's amazing how different people read text differently.

 

"as you can imagine, that killed any thoughts of continuing with /that/ relationship"

That doesn't read like a mutual understanding. If it was "our" relationship or simply "the" relationship I could understand, but I don't interpret that "that" relationship was a 4on4 mutual agreement.

Now I only take a slight interest because I know a swinging couple that had the same dilemma. The miss was diagnosed with breast cancer. That woman did not need an abandonment from all her friends, so I just can't help but feel sorry for this unknown woman. Even myself, the last thing I'd want is to feel unwarranted, unwelcome, not useful to my friends and aquaintences.

If that's not what was meant then I'm sorry, nothing against anybody, just feeling for this woman is all. I'd hate to have to go through anything like that. =[

 

No, it was simply a case of the sexual side of things coming to an abrupt end. However, we wanted to be there to support her, she chose to cut herself off from us.

 

That's good then.