Wierdest reasons for not coming into work.

i forgot how to tell time

 

I woke up neekid in Key West....:-0

 

my fingers are tied

 

I've swallowed the pet gold feesh....

 

My dog has a cold.

 

i have to set all the lobster at Red Lobster free today

 

gotta get drunk for my jury duty interview

 

bank went under and the sheriffs told me to leave. I killed them all..
Ill work from my home office till FBI negotiator kills the power..
by that time the house will be filled with natural gas and ignited by a 3rd floor candle..:seeya:

 

I can't top that on.......I over slept.....lol

 

got a letter from Revenue Canada today and I have to do my year before last years taxes

 

i got a letter from Ed McMahon saying i might already be a winner

 

gotta go to church

 

my boat sunk

 

too dang cold....

 

its snowing moose and bears

 

children are knocking at my door

 

my neighbor is having a wedding for her cocker spaniel and i'm a bridesmaid

 

just opened a fresh brew

 

downloaded massive amounts of porn today and Im gonna be busy

 

pit bull loose, in top of tree, send help...