Wierdest reasons for not coming into work.

i must have a gallon of water soon

 

getting a vegetable oil enema

 

getting high with hippies today

 

im trippin with some guy i dont know

 

need to pay it forward today

 

sent my clothes out to be cleaned, there not back yet!!!!!!!!!!

 

I flew the coop

 

got locked in the coop

 

its almost the weekend...

 

my brains operating system has crashed

 

i'm projectile vomiting today, instead...

 

don't you all realize I retired ten years ago....

 

cant find my slippers

 

auditioning for american idol today

 

I cant find my lucky socks

 

driving back from canada with a nasty pair of sock in my truck....

 

im going to blow up peoples mail boxes

 

my couch caught on fire....

 

Someone stole my car, and my garage.

 

im defrosting the deep freeze