Why some spouses watch each other rotting away?

this is something that really happened yesterday on the plane when i flew back from hamburg. Condor Airlines, 24th January 2018. Around 6pm:

there was a couple sitting in the same feet-free row where I was sitting.
This couple have been married for many years and between 50-60 years old.
All of a sudden the man his bloodcirculation collapsed. "kreislaufzusammenbruch" .
The woman , sitting right next to him , looked at him as if he was an alien from planet neptun. She seemingly forgot the 30 years of marriage and everything they have been "sharing" . So, she called the stewardess to come and help .. help who? help HER husband lol. Then ... basically all that the stewardess was doing (obviosuly she was not a medical professional either ) was what the wife was supposed to do lol. She touched him and gave him some love (im exageratting a bit) , then after some minutes he regained consciousness and was fine again. It broke my heart . I then sat next to him and basically (again lol) replaced his wife. I did what his wife was supposed to do. Except i did not kiss him. During the whole flight i was talking with him in a very private and lovely way because i knew deep inside that all he needed was some consolation/attention. He felt so good and strong. He even went to piss about 4 times during our conversation.

Why do some spouses sometimes act that way?
I have seen that a couple times, by the way.

i dont know about you but i dont want to be married to somebody who will watch me rotting away . Scared to touch me lol. "please miss come and touch my husband he is not feeling good " lol.

After that incident i was analyzing what the reason for what happened could be. The answer ---> being scared to take responsibility. It is the same attitude as "I need a foreign doctor to check on my health" .
it is basically a little version of saying "i am handicapped"

 

You actually don't know anything about that couple, and it's wrong for you to pass judgement like that!
The woman could have been in shock!
The man could be a beast! You have no right to interfere! You split that couple up and interfered.. that's all I see, sorry!

 

Maybe she gets a whole bunch of money if he keels over

 

Hey man, that was awesome what you did, and very genuine as well. A lot of people these days lack any compassion and we seem to be more disconnected as a society these days. 30 years of marriage is a lot of time together, and couples can be quite unique in how they treat each other, being married that long. Some couples are just as cuddly-cuddly when they first started dating, and some are really rough around the edges, blunt, somewhat merciless in the way they communicate with each other. Regardless, they love each other and have grown up together with a lot of things that have happened in 30 years that has shaped that marriage into what it is today.

 

it could be one of those couples who stayed together despite having a horrible marriage.....it happens all the time....they stay together for the kids sake...or because of finances or whatever reason.....the poor bastard was probably praying for the lord to take him away ...that also happens i am sure

that was very nice what you did david.....btw...you don't have to point out ''no homo''...or ''homo'' for that matter....

 

allright i deleted the "homo"

to you and to eric and everybody else: maybe I did not convey the incident very well, but , they WERE truly loving each other, i sensed it, and everbody else did, they were holding hands the whole time, the wife was not at all what you people imagine or suspect, none of these houchies with long fingernails and high heels, quite the opposite, an overweight, natural, humble woman, she brought a lot of food - which she previosuly cooked at home - for her husband and continously cared for him, gave him his medicine,food etc.. She was his best nurse! She even gave some of her homemade food to me. BUT - B U T - when he collapsed , then, suddenly she let go of him and did not know what to do. I dont get it. Why? when the stewardess came and touched,hugged,kneated him like dough , his wife was standing behind and crying. why couldnt she do what the stewardess did? Maybe, as I said, she didnt dare to take responsibility. Its like...you know, when you pass lets say a big fight between 2 guys you dont interfere, or...when you see a weird thing happening on the street where you could help, many people turn a blind eye because they dont want to be involved. Thats the only explanation i can think of because love was surely not lacking ...

 

Now you made it into a totally different story! Jees David!

The woman was in shock!

 

And just like that, everyone caught bubonic plague

 

Some people just don't know how to respond in emergencies. I am like that. My mom had a bad fall once and I froze up and my friend helped her. Doesnt mean I didn't care, I love my mom more than almost anyone else in the world but my insides clench up when I see anyone in pain and I go into shock and don't know what to do. Once I snapped out of it I helped my mom but I just froze for a minute

I once briefly considered a career in nursing but I had to come to terms with my own limitations lol. Some people just do not do well in emergency situations

 

thanks for sharing
that's interesting
...and I also see it that way

how can we solve this problem?
what can a person like you who "freezes" in such situations do?
Imagine what if that woman was alone with her husband and the same happened ? Would she then literally do what this thread' s titel says "watch him rotting away" ?

 

No I think she would have gotten over it.

My boyfriend fainted a few months ago, I thought he was dead for a minute. I didn't freeze up then, I slapped the shit out of his face and yelled at him until he woke up lol. Because I knew it depended on me, no one else was there. I'm sure if she was alone instinct would kick in

 

lol morrow

 

You thought he was dead? That must have been a scary few minutes until he woke up.

 

waoo thats amazing meliai ! you have been in a similar situation then. Now I understand ...
Maybe we should check if our future spouse "freezes" in situations like these before going into relationships

 

Yes, I agree she certainly was, and just wasn't sure what to do.

 

Slapped the SHIT OUTTA HIM! I love it!!!

 

meliai you said you wanted to become a nurse, my mum is a nurse, i will make sure in case i ever faint i will be close to my mum but she is in los angeles...

 

Yeah, I was too panicky to think to check for a pulse, I just started hitting him lol. It worked, I brought him back to life .

 

Did you ever find out what happened? Could be a sign of a larger medical issue

 

Er....we may have been tripping shrooms. Not really tripping, we were on the comedown, but still a little out of it. Which is why I thought he was dead.

I learned later that fainting while tripping is actually pretty common.

Kicked my ass though, I won't trip again for a loooong time. That was the first time I had tripped in like 6 years actually and I'm a little disappointed the fainting episode just completely ruined shrooms for me