WHy my bf doesnt want sex as much now?

OK so we had a up and down relationship, however it is alot better now..Ill start and say we started dating, we were doing sex often and was good, but then I got pregnant , and the sex went down, because He is a drinker , and me being sober, who wants to have sex when someone is drunk often lol....so we didnt have sex often..btw he cheated on me when i was 9 months pregnant ! well then we started to have more sex, but before I rejected so many times, cus we were fighting alot , and I just wasnt in the mood or I was too tired..he use to want to have sex with me and tried alot...I declined, but now he doesnt try at all! I try to start it, but he will say he is too tired ( he does work hard and I know he gets tired), then there was an excuse of I wasnt ont he pill ( but that didnt stop him before), but I am on it now...we did have sex last night, but I am afraid is he seeing someone? is he not attracted to me? He has said a few times, " Oh I am just not use to getting it anymore"..what does that mean?Should I just keep trying to motivate the sex? What do you guys think? ( mainly men's opinions ) thanks

 

Based on what you said about his past history and assuming he doesn't have a medical condition that reduced his sex drive, I'd say it's 99.8734% sure that he cheating on you, either with another woman or with his hands...

 

^Masturbation is not cheating. It's part of a healthy sex life.

 

i lost my sex drive, i think because of using opiates so many years.
does he use pills/opiates?

 

he sounds like quite the catch. do whatever it takes to keep this one.

 

Yes I agree, I mean hes only cheated on you while you were 9 months pregnant you know

 

Did I miss something? Did she say he cheated on her via masturbation? I don't see that?....

 

cheating can very well be the case. but if you love and cherish your relationship with him you should first gain some confidence.. my husband and i went thru this sex spell or lack there off but sometimes the both of us are extremely tired.. however if he asked me for some theres no way in hell i would turn him down. turning your OWN man down for sex is practically handing him over to another female. i would say to try something new, make the sex fun.. make it exciting dont make it seem like a chore. have some porn playing when he gets home while u lay in the bed naked playin with yourself.. if he's doesnt wanna have sex after witnessing that then yeah.. he might be seeing someone else... and it might be a MAN lol

 

This sounds like a train wreck on both sides...

First he sounds like a drunk and cheats on you. Is that really the kind of guy you see yourself being with long term? If so then wow you have some low expectations...

On the other hand you got pregnant. And yes I blame this on you. it's your body, you should have been on the pill way back when and you wouldn't have brought this unwanted child into the world. So I'm not trying to be an ass, but yes that's on you...


So now what? He is probably telling the truth and probably is bored or tired of rejection to the point where he doesn't care to try anymore. Also he probably does have something on the side or wouldn't hesitate to do so in the future being he has in the past. I'm not going to take sides on this it certainly doesn't sound like the kind of life I would want. You can do nothing and keep along the same unhappy path your on now or determine what it is you do want and make that happen

 

I disagree with it being all on her. They are equally to be blamed. He could have wrapped it up himself.
I got pregnant on the pill, so don't assume she wasn't taking it.

He doesn't sound like much of a catch, but to each his own. I would have dumped him for cheating on me. Once a cheater....

 

Haha!

Yeah, he sounds like a piece of shit. Very immature too. My advice, ditch the loser and improve your english.

 

Because of how dysfunctional this relationship is, he probably isn't attracted to you anymore (possibly because of post-pregnancy body) and even if he is, he doesn't want to put up with the rejection and BS that goes along with it.

 

9 months pregnent and he cheated on you! This guy isn't worth any effort on your part. I don't even get why you would want to have sex with a piece of shit like that.