Why men aren't marrying

I have just one question for those demanding that we ‘man up’:

“What’s in it for us?”

We’re hearing a hue and cry about how us Peter Pans are impoverishing (financially, socially, whatever) women, children and society as a whole. But it’s always phrased as being a tragedy for others, not the men themselves. How DARE we not fall into line and play the role we have been assigned. How DARE we refuse to roll the boulder up the hill. How DARE we have fun, when we should be toiling to pay for someone else’s fun. How DARE we look after our own rational best interests.

Man up and marry a woman? Why? No, seriously, why? Modern marriage holds zero benefits for the groom. We can be divorced on a whim and converted to an indentured servant for years. A man who wants to provide the best environment for his children will favour a stable, two-parent household, but that decision is ultimately not ours to make. Social conservatives and others trying to save the institute of marriage will point to statistics about how married men are healthier and happier, but they get very tetchy when asked how signing a one-sided legal contract accomplishes this, as opposed to a long term girlfriend. We are constantly told that men are afraid of commitment, yet the bulk of divorces are initiated by the woman. Funny how that works. I used to believe in starting a family; I was even lucky enough to grow up in a two-parent household, so I can’t even claim I was personally scarred somehow. But I’ve seen enough carnage amongst my friends and coworkers. I’ve no intention of being someone’s walking ATM and sperm-donor, or a prop in their ‘starter marriage.’

Man up and be a father? This line of arguement is a crock. With divorce rampant there’s a good chance we will be shut out from much of our children’s life, even if we’re willing to move heaven and earth to be there for them. The standard line is to start talking about deadbeat dads. But what about mothers who use the kids as hostages in divorce? Even if our ex-wife is a saint, we’re still going to be a casual presence at best. And if she’s even slightly vindictive, all bets are off in the family court system. Me, I like kids, and think I could do a damn good job as a father. Even thought about adopting once, but considering that the official party line is that males (and fathers) are both superfluous and evil, they’d probably drop me on the sex offender registry just for inquiring.

Man up and be a role model? What’s that? Oh, you mean old/dead white men. Why would anyone want us to emulate history’s greatest villains? Men (boys and adults alike) are bombarded with constant degradation, told we are inferior, worthless, stupid, evil, incompetent, untrustworthy subhumans. This is echoed 24/7 by our teachers, the media, the courts and our legislatures. It is even echoed by some of our own parents, who been wholly brainwashed by the constant misandrist drumbeat. In many jurisdictions and proceedings, we have been stripped of “innocent until proven guilty” (usually just customarily, but occasionally it’s explicitly enshrined in law) . I suppose a ‘real man’ would spend his days crusading against this, but I despise arguing with tittering fools and don’t need the aggravation. Besides, we can accomplish a great deal (and have, and will) simply by withdrawing our participation and our consent.

Man up and work hard? Sure. But for who? Work overtime to provide a comfortable life for your wife and kids? Who then leave because ‘you’re never there’? Work overtime to be an economic engine for the cash-strapped welfare and social security systems? Why should I feel compelled to contribute to a ponzi scheme that I’ll never collect on in my own retirement? My career is proceeding quite well, thank you very much, and I am pursuing it because it enriches (financially and emotionally) ME, not someone else.

Man up and conform to societal expectations? Half the economic woes of these past few years can be traced to the institutionalization of keeping up with the Jones. Buy the huge house, buy the yard toys, buy the RV, take that vacation abroad, be seen at the trendy new spot, buy the latest Apple gadget… Socially and economically, we have no interest in keeping up appearances. I can live very comfortably and fund my interests on as little as $20k a year. I have plenty of leisure time to enjoy my life, friends and hobbies without working myself into an early grave or stressing about where the next loan payment for my status symbol is going to come from.

The constant haranging to ‘man up’ conjures up the image of a jolly WWI general, shouting “Fix bayonets and over the top lads! The machine guns can’t get you all!” Forget it, we’re done being sacrificial lambs for someone else. Men aren’t manning up, but we ARE waking up. It’s a rigged game that we refuse to play, and no amount of shaming language is going to get us off the bench. Want more metaphors? You may have heard the term ‘marriage strike,’ but it goes beyond that. We’re not failing to ‘man up,’ we’re just working to rule. Work slowdowns will continue until management chooses to negotiate fairly and transparently; too bad they’ve got nothing to bring to the table.

Yes, we’re a bunch of losers. THE losers. We lost. Feminists, welfare-statists, the rest… You won. We concede defeat. You got everything you wanted. You’ve been saying for years that you don’t need us, and we’ll gladly oblige. We’re MGTOWs, Men Going Their Own Way. We don’t want to fight you. We don’t NEED to fight you. If anything, we should be thanking you. We’re free of being beasts of others burdens. We’ve realized there is no lock on the cell door. We’ve taken the Red Pill. You can’t hurt us, and you have nothing we want.

Now, go away and leave us alone.

 

the only reason i would marry is if i loved the guy and he really wanted to get married, if it was important to him somehow. i'm a romantic like that.

otherwise, on my own, i wouldn't come up with the idea nor would i care. marriage is just a paper, a state institution and i don't need any of that to build a fulfilling life with another man.

but, i do say this, guys are getting married and some of them get married at a horrifyingly young age. if you don't want to marry, then don't marry. if you let a chick, kids, or whoever to ''pressure'' you into marriage when in reality you do not want it -- why complain? fucking stand up for what you want and say no marriage. every guy knows that they can still have the houses, kids, etc without getting married. and if your female companion dumps you because you refused to get married to her -- you're smart enough to know she wasn't the real deal.

 

Been there, tried it - it did not last
- although quite fortunate did not get taken to the cleaners

 

This world would be a better place if more men didn't want to marry and refused to conform.

And laws should be changed to allow men to adopt children on their own.

The way it is, men are kind of hostages, if they want children.

I totally understand your rant.

 

"is if i loved the guy"

So by your usage of the term "guy", you are either a homosexual male or a heterosexual woman. Let me just assume that you are a heterosexual woman.

Okay, so this subforum is called Men's Issues. You are a woman. What are you doing on a forum for men? Can you women not leave us men alone for even 5 minutes?

 

"your rant"

Oh, so it's a "rant" now if a man dares to explain in very logical terms WHY men are treated like subhumans in the Western world?

I guess you are the type of person to equate the concept of human being treated like HUMAN BEINGS with basic human rights as equal to "woman hatred".

In others, to dare to suggest that men are HUMAN BEINGS and should be treated with basic human rights, is "woman hatred".

By that same logic, a jew who says that nazis should stop oppressing jews is a "nazi hater".

Do you women even realize how deeply ingrained MISANDRY (man hatred) is in yourselves?

 

If it was like the '50s then I could see wanting to marry.
Why marry now when you can potentially loose half of what you've worked so hard on....

 

\

 

You come off as a misogynist in every post/thread you've made. Is that what you're going for? You're also asking why women are responding in men's issues. I don't see anything in the forum rules saying women can't post here. Aren't you even a little interested in what women have to say concerning your thread? Op, I'm curious about your background and history with women. What caused you to have these views? Have you ever been married? Divorced?

 

We are allowed to post in this forum?
Awesome. =D
Cause I LOL'd @ "what's in it for us" and figured it wasn't worth the read, not even for more laughs.

 

The OP was well written, even though the situation isn't as dire as it is being presented.

 

God you're whiny.

She was agreeing with you in her post. You literally picked one word you didn't like and ran with it instead of recognizing she was in agreement. Weird.

 

sheesh. i'm a homosexual guy, thank you very much.

 

It's a lot less complicated than that. I'm writing here in a foreign language to me. I've never lived in an English speaking country, I've never had relationships with English speaking people. My English, I've learned at public schools of a 3rd world country.

So, I can't always get it right, when I'm trying to express myself in English.

I'm curious: where did I write anything about hate? I've read my post again and l only talk about unfairness of the system.

Anyway, have a good day.

 

Remember, you reap what you sow. So if you want to be treated fairly, stop treating women like shit.

 

Love you....

 

However, to be fair to OP...some females are vile, too. I always told my brother not to let any female get pregnant and trap him into something life long he did not want to be trapped into....as some females can be mean when it comes to that....and then they have the control with the visiting(I have seen this happen. i don't respect females who do this, either....and that was their intent...not love)....and wanting money besides, if the marriage does not work out....etc....so there is good and bad in both sexes.....

 

Lol smart man, I'm not marrying anybody without a prenup. People are unpredictable, especially women

 

Commitment= very scary