Why do some people....

I get the same kind of thing from my aunt, Duke (she's gay lol), once she called the house and was bitching about something and I said something about my baby and she said something really rude, like, "well you shoulda kept your legs closed". she doesn't know much about me and just assumed that since I'm not married, I just got pregnant from some random guy around town, like "woops". One other time it was my grandpa. I was probably 6-7 months pregnant and my boyfriend and I were going through some hard times. Grandpa says "so when are you gonna get married" and I said "when I'm ready" he said "well do you want your kid to have a good life" "yes" "well you better get married then". after that I just walked home, which was completely on the other side of town. I didn't care.

 

It's the same type of internet mindset that allows for comments made about your appearance too.

I belong to several MySpace groups and we get into debates frequently. You can tell the troll who's on the losing end and knows it, because they always resort to "You're fat" or "You're ugly" comments.

I have had my children attacked by them too. One guy said I should have my kids taken away because I was unfit..why? Because my avatar was a topless Jay Hernandez. Another person was going around posting in my groups and on my page that there was no way my kids could be mine because "I'm too ugly to have had kids that cute."

*sigh*

All you can do is laugh.

 

Yes. I'm sorry that woman was such a butt about your being pregnant. Maybe she was jealous?

Tamee, I get the same "Get married or your kids will have crap lives" comments all the time. I don't think getting pregnant should be a reason to get married. I know plenty of kids that turned out just fine with parents that had never been married.

I hate the 'You're ugly' comments. It's....childish. Well, any comment like that or like the children put-downs are childish. Just because of a difference of opinion.

 

I have had some comments from some of my brothers friends...I wouldn't have known about them but unbenowest to them one of their friends is also one of mine, anyhow it made me grumpy because how dare they judge thier situation in life as being a better one than mine to bring a child into...in fact since I heard about their comments about my single parent status I have thought loads about it and decided that it is bad luck for their kid to be bought up in such a close minded household and to remember to teach my daughter that if anyone ever says anything to her about her family life to be sure to have a go at them about the mental capacity of their parents as anyone who bases their decisions on whether one person is better than another based on whether there are two parents in the immediate vicinity seriously needs to get some help and to learn to deal with the fact that the world is full of different colours of the rainbow and that her life only adds another colour to this rainbow.

*rant rant rant*
:X
sheesh....if people give you grief remember that it is them that live with their mindset, not you!

 

I think people are forgetting the MEANING of being married. it's about strong love and commitment, which you can have WITHOUT marriage. marriage is just a symbol. Axyn and I have a great spiritual connection and we feel like that "marries" us, even if we never get the actual ceremony done. I think that's something not a lot of people realize.

well I think that's takin it a bit too far

 

why is it ok for parents to instill in their children values that only having a mum and dad is normal and that when you have only a mum you are somehow a lesser member of society or somehow lacking? Or if you have dad or a mum who is not there all the time...I totally reject this and believe that a child is so much more than this narrow definition...she is as good, as beautiful, as strong, as full of potential as any child who has a mum and dad right there and right now and I think that my daughter needs to be taught to tell people that come at her with this type of attitude to tell them where to go because they are passing judgements on her that have nothing to do with her abilities/goodness as a person but rather they have some preconfigured idea of what it is that the world needs or wants in people.

 

Kyrsten, I get alot of that too. I'm a very young 23. I look/sound 16. Sometimes I'm really goofy, which adds to the illusion! The WORST was when I was at a dinner/party for a dance group my DH played guitar for. (He played flamenco guitar for a class of 6-8 year old girls learning flamenco.) I was maybe 7 months along and a mother came up to me and said : "We're so happy for you and Steve! When he started bringing you to practice, I thought you were his daugher. But then you got pregnant and one of the other mothers told me, you're his fiance!" I smiled and nodded. It was disturbing. Then, I was holding DS and we were in an elevator in our swimsuits going to the pool on vacation and this guy was making small talk and he said something about how nice of me to take my baby brother to the pool! Aaaaargh!

 

And, I got a lot of that 'Breeder Bitch' attitude from my "friends" when I was first PG. They were soooooo supportive when I was considering an abortion, but as soon as I decided to keep him, they got nasty! Heard "You're not ready for a baby!' Says who? "It is irresponsible of you to bring that child into the world!". Whatev. Like my husband says (and it's nasty, I know, but I don't care!) "I hope they like cats!"