Why do ppl think being too nice is a bad thing?

This world is a shit hole now......

I have been told by multiple people that I am too nice. They say it like its a bad thing. People have told me "I like you but you are too nice." "You are way too nice." Im told by multiple people that I am extremely polite and that I am one of the sweetest most kindest ppl they have ever met.

However,people have also told me that I should not be too nice.

I am honestly just being myself. I try to be loving and caring to people and I think its how we all should be!!

What do ya'll think??

 

This world is a shit hole...

 

What are you doing hanging out with the kind of people who keep saying you should not be so nice.

 

I agree! This world needs more nice people!

 

Sometimes TOO nice means not having boundaries, letting people take advantage.. But since you're happy and not feeling taken advantage of, I don't see how you could be too nice. I'd need some examples of behavior that makes people tell you that to know what they mean.

 

Also people may misinterpret niceness for having ulterior motives.

It's why I'm not nice to girls I'm interested in until after the third date.

 

Drifttrue summed it up nicely--not having boundaries and letting people take advantage of you.

I used to agree that the world is a shithole, but I don't think that anymore.

 

It's odd, there seems like a pervasive stigma to being nice but then people act baffled when someone shoots up a school or supermarket.

 

I don't agree that there is a stigma to being nice--what do you mean by that?

I think there is a stereotype around being "a nice guy", but in that situation, nice means something different than the commonly understood definition.

 

I think that you have hit the nail on the head.
I am always willing to help anyone, but that does not involve going along with their stupidity.
Perhaps that is why I am not seen as "too" nice.

 

The op provided some examples, people encouraging him to not be so nice as if it's an undesirable characteristic.

 

Right--but he gave no context. I would like to hear the context.

 

There is a lot bad in this world but there is also a lot of good!

 

Ok, those were my initial thoughts to the context or lack thereof provided... Since context is important, I want to clarify, Dude111 I am not suggesting you shoot up a school or supermarket.

 

Dude111 would have to use a gun from 1980 because ALL THE NEW GUNS ARE CRAP!!!

 

Imagine the headlines...

Supermarket shooter identified as Jimmy Carter supporter

 

People generally are mean, that's why. Nobody wants to talk to a nice person. They want to talk to people they can make fun of other people with, and that's it.

 

Possible motive: his brand of mac n cheese was discontinued

 

So I work with this guy who is really nice.
I like him, but I like him much better when he lets his dark humor slip out on occasion.
And I like him because I've noticed people will talk to him, they enjoy talking to him because he's nice..but because I sit next to him I see these conversations all day, and I've noticed he doesnt really like talking to other people. He gets annoyed with them, but he's nice so he would never let it show. But I notice.

I bring him up as an example, because he's nice, but his niceness isn't why I like him.

I think people like flawed people. They want to know everyone else is just as messed up as they are. Nice is fine, but it's all the little not so nice quirks that other people really find interesting.

 

It's so true. I had this girlfriend who was really mean, and I loved it! I don't know if that's the same. I let so much slide with her, and her personality totally rubbed off on me (I was like 20 years old), but I really had strong feelings. I think it was partially because I could see the flaws.

 

People hate flawed people. They just love mean people. Because they're hypocrites.