When you first------

--------had your first bisexual encounter (as an ADULT) did you (afterwards) say: "Wow! I gotta do this again"-thus setting the stage for an adulthood sex with both guys and gals? Or-despite really "getting into it"-you were too afraid of thinking that you could be gay-said "We gotta stop doing this-it isn't right"-and then had no further desires for sex with another guy-----that is-----until your latent urges resurfaced years later----and could no longer be denied------or ignored? How did you finally say:"OK-------I gotta be bi-----hell-this is what I LIKE and what I WANT and there is nothing that's going to change these strong desires to be with another guy" and just "chalk it up" that you get off on ANY sex-regardless if it is with another guy or a lady? And could care less who objects?

 

I suppose my bisexual journey has been somewhat like what you have described. After years of curiosity I finally explored getting and giving blowjobs. Really not being interested in the rest of the guy. It was exciting and I really enjoyed it. More than I thought I would. Being married I suppressed my desires for mens cocks and did my best to “be straight”. As you described the urge’s didn’t go away and sex at home became less and less frequent. These days it non existent so if I’m going to have any sex life at all it’s going to be discreetly on the side. Tougher to come up with if I were only interested in women.
I find these days it’s more than just blowjobs that I’m interested in. I can say yes I’m bisexual. And I can come to grips with it more or less. I say that because I do wish I didn’t have to keep it so private but I do. It’s the circumstance I am in. But, it’s also who I am. After decades of struggling with it I am able to be honest with at least myself.

 

I think that your "journey" is one that has been taken by countless other guys who-throughout life-had to supress their "bi side" to try to be "straight"-----------if the desires to be sexual with other guys is there--------it is NOT going to just suddenly disappear------regardless what a fellow thinks------BE YOURSELF------ENJOY what you desire-and do not let anyone dictate to you what you SHOULD or NOT be----it is YOUR life!

 

I also think that your "journey" is also one that countless young teen fellows grapple with as they approach young adulthood-with cyber bullying now out of control-and taunting and bullying at school-----young bi guys indeed need to be careful WHO they "open up" to------too often-a "trusted friend" is ANYTHING but----DISCRETION is the byword here----for certain------------

 

In a PERFECT society-there would be no need for labeling-and certainly no need (or inclination) to judge others; recall in the Bible: "Judge not-least ye be judged"-----------

 

------sad that so few take the Bible quote I just posted to heart----------

 

I have always been fascinated by adults who find/discover/get introduced to bisexuality. As someone who got introduced when I was young, I recognized that I didn't have years of living as a heterosexual to confuse the onset of bisexuality so it was "easy" for me to adapt to bisexuality. Watching adults trying to adjust and adapt to it is... interesting. They have to unlearn so much in order to learn a new and different reality.

 

KDaddy23: Well said! At too early an age-boys who engage in sex with their buddies (and who also enjoy it) are indeed in a quandry as they get into their teen years and early adulthood-as now they are finding out that only HETEROSEXUAL sex is the ONLY "acceptable" sex and is what is "right"; these young guys with strong bisexual leanings are also brought up with that long-redundant crap "big boys don't cry"------"PUB"! (Pure Unadulterated Bulls**t")--------all this dangerous brainwashing at an early age-------

 

It's... new; it's exciting to know that you're being "bad" but, at the same time, it all feels right and normal. You adjust and adapt to it; if you're like me, you indulge at every turn and revel in all of it so by the time you're a legal - and, hopefully, responsible adult - there's no... unlearning to do because you're already well-adjusted and adapted to bisexuality. As opposed to those who I say are "late to the party" and have to shed years or decades of heterosexual behaviors and beliefs to be able to understand that that craving to have sex with a man is... pretty normal and can be pretty damned awesome.

 

Papa: Thank you for sharing these personal experiences and opinions here; certainly-you had to endure pretty rough patches through the years; thankfully-you finally ACCEPT yourself for WHAT you ARE-and NOT what you are SUPPOSED to be------if it (sex with another guy) feels GOOD and NATURAL----then there you are!

 

Papa: If I had a dollar for all the bi guys who are "betrothed" and whose spouse does not know of his true sexuality-yours truly could now boast a Swiss bank account for certain-------consider also-of all the bi guys who "get hitched" thinking that will supress their desires to be enjoying sex with another guy------indeed-they are in the wrong-but-what are they to do-thinking that what the feel is WRONG------and how great the loss could be for all concerned if his bi side is "outed"---------it's all so sad------and a lot of unnecessary suffering and anguish----that alone can lead to serious issues in the future-------------

 

If sex between men wasn't so vilified, guys wouldn't have to struggle with the duality of their sexual and even romantic desires but since we've not yet learned to ignore the religious prohibition, guys who really find out about this later in life continue to struggle. It's also why I've told so many guys to leave this alone because once you go down this path, it's not going to be easy moving along it - and especially the many hitched guys who needed to if there was, in fact, more to sex than just pussy. I've been asked many times how I cope with being bisexual and I tell them, "I've been like this since I was nine, so I've had a lot of time to put everything into perspective..." as opposed to the 20-year-olds like thepapasmurph who are usually well-indoctrinated to heterosexuality but once introduced to the added joys of cock, here comes the guilt and confusion or, yeah, what nine-year-old me asked with a man's cum in my belly and making me sticky between my buttcheeks: How can something everyone says is so bad feel so good?

Because it's supposed to, and I think that once one understands this and can forget social and religious norms - and see them for the incomplete truth that they are - it becomes less complicated even when hitched... or at least it was this way for me having gotten disabused of our morality when I did. A friend I introduced said, "You make this look easy!" and I replied that, no, it isn't easy, but it's really not all that hard to understand and you bother to learn some stuff about human nature and a man's hard-wired compulsion to have sex, well, the one most of us have...

 

KDaddy23: Another excellent post----a good deal of "food for thought" here-for certain! It's like the double-standard of when straight guys get really turned on by watching a lesbian flick-BUT-the thought of two GUYS doing one another is beyond gross-sickening and disgusting (with guys like these: "gay is indeed OK"------as long as it had LADIES "getting it on"-----and NOT guys!) Again-it's all about how straight "society" innoculates that sex between guys is WRONG------period------what a load of crap---------- Then-too-you gotta wonder of the bigots who are secretly attracted to other guys-BUT-by "playing the part" of a totally straight guy-he does not need to worry about accusing fingers pointing his way

 

It sets adult bisexuals up to not just fail but epically so because one has to take all of the "negative press" that homosexual sex has gotten over the eons and... ditch it while living in a world that's still run by the morally and religiously righteous and their message of same-sex hatred still abounds. It takes a lot of guys years to be okay with having sex with both men and women and it's just another time having sex; some guys have been trying to assimilate all of this for years and decades and still struggle with the duality because they're so worried about what someone else is going to say should the find out that they're not exactly all that straight. Again, I went through that as a teen and survived it - but imagine what it's like to be an adult bisexual male with everything to lose should it get out that you like men fucking you in the ass. Or your whole "reason for being" is to be on your knees and sucking cock - and the cocks of men who also know that there's nothing really wrong with this but let's keep it on the down low, okay?

And do some guys really believe that if you only have sex with men when there's a woman present that it means you're still straight? Buddy, I've got news for ya and you're not going to like it. The sheer hypocrisy to say that two women getting it on is hot and sexy and is okay but two guys having sex isn't. Now imagine being a newly minted adult bisexual and having to rearrange everything you thought you knew about love, sex, and relationships. The bigotry you speak of is borne out of the continued belief in religious dogma but if you can get your head past that bullshit, adjusting and adapting to bisexuality becomes easier on one's mind.

Really... when I'm going down on a guy and sucking the cum out of him and thinking about getting some pussy when I get home, do you think that I give a fuck about what anyone else has to say about my sexuality? I haven't given a fuck about that since I was like 15 or 16...

 

KDaddy23: Also sad how all these hypocritical religious "holy roller" zealots are so hell-bent on "preaching hatred in honor of the Lord"---if that is not the highest plateau of ignorance-I do not know what is (I truly feel for those gay/bi fellows who reside in the "Bible Belt"); personally-I adhere to the theory that sexual urges/lust is perhaps our strongest "connection" to the Neanderthal era------being 100% gay (with NO sexual interest in the ladies) I found the sexuality that defined this fellow was a curse-----and-strangely enough-I had no desire to be straight either-I thought it would be easier-and less painful-to be "asexual" with NO desire for either sex; Today-I do not dwell on the sexuality that I poccess------I know the anti-gay hatred and bigotry that is outside in the world-and-as you know-I long ago decided (with NO outside infuence) that I prefer to scratch off any chances of bashing or painful encounters; I was totally honest with this guy's "inner self" and said: "This is YOUR decision-it is right for YOU-and NO ONE else"-----WHY I was born gay instead of straight (like late brothers) has confounded yours truly for years; today-I just think "Oh well" and go on with a quiet-sedentry life-hobbies-personal interests----I long ago was open and honest about the fears and the faults within------but-again-do not choose to dwell on it-----and just accept what is real-----and what is not-----without the need to "sugar coat" anything-----we are ALL different-and there is NO "book of rules" that is cast in stone dictating how ANY of us should "follow the leader" just to satisfy what a "straight society" dictates----I just take it life "day-to-day" and go through life accordingly--------------in a quiet and peaceful fashion-----------

 

Just more proof of how adults struggle with sexuality issues, huh? The reality can be a motherfucker for adults to handle and more so when they're paying attention to shit that has nothing to do with what they're thinking and feeling, which is more likely to be the truth than the bullshit they're paying attention to. This is our society's fault; this is religion's fault. And then I'll kinda chastise you because do you think that only adults have to deal with their thoughts and feelings about doing something they know good and damned well they weren't supposed to do? Do you really believe that only an adult can say, "Wow, that was amazing - I need to do that again!"? Or that only adults have concerns about really being gay? Or that only adults try to walk away from the duality of their desires and feelings and find that they can't ignore them and feel compelled to once again have sex in one of the most prohibited way?

Or that only adults find themselves in that position to decide to be bisexual and be able to determine if they're making the right decision for themselves?

 

KDaddy23---------another excellent post for certain; if an adult finds struggling with "alternate sexuality" issues light-years beyond trying and difficult-----just think of the plight of bi/gay youth-----------just who can these kids REALLY trust? Parents? School counselors? Friends? Any way you look at it----these kids are indeed fighting an uphill battle-to be sure------in today's totally screwed-up and bigoted world-----HOW can gay/bi boys (teens) BEGIN to put their trust into ANYONE else-----if for no other reason-to "let it all out" and at least ease the confusion and battles within their souls--------

 

The struggle is real so we gotta talk about it in real terms. You see, it's not that kids can't figure this out - it really ain't rocket science - but once you factor in parents and peer pressure, sure - they have a long row to hoe but that first experience? Hell, yeah - gotta do it again! Obviously, I wasn't an adult when I had that first experience, but I knew that I had to do more of it and find out as much as I could about it and sex, on the whole! Learning quickly that there are people who weren't going to like me because they'd misidentify me as a homosexual but that was part of the learning process for me. And having sex like it was going out of style any moment now. Telling myself that maybe I should stop having sex with boys and just utterly failing in that endeavor... because the sex - sucking cock, being sucked, fucking and being fucked - felt so goddamned good! How could I just stop having this sex?

And having issues. Losing friends. Bullies. But none of that took away from that first experience and the need and drive to get more dick and if I could still get pussy, does it get any better than that? Guilty? Who has time to feel guilty? Why should I feel guilty about something I wanted to do? True enough, not everyone "instantly" gets on board with this and it's just as hard for adults as it is for any pre-adults trying to survive in a straight world and... they're not all that straight.