What's the benefit of being judgmental?

That's absolutely a possibility. I know a lot of people are quick to say, "they're just jealous" when something hateful is said. I'm not always sure that's the case, but I do know misery desires company.

 

If we are all honest we all judge or pass judgment on others. Most people will do so without giving it voice and causing harm to others. That is how we form our own personal space and develop friendships and relationships with others, based upon our views and comfort level.

I agree with Nox, Lunar and others who have stated that to try to separate judgments would be nice to be able to do but darn near impossible. Every action or thought we have about another person or situation is a judgment. This is not only the negative but also the positive. Working within niceties is in my opinion a move towards political correctness. From the moment we meet someone we are forming opinions.

Even as far as the original examples go, there is still some form of opinion being made be it positive or negative. Even the stance of it does not have any bearing on my life so it is fine, is a judgement.

I understand the original topic but I think it is impossible to split hairs on what we judge. That dress or mannerism may be not something you would comment on but if it is something that you do not participate in, it might be the reason you choose not to be involved with another person.

Complex topic.

 

Conversation, disagreement, bickering, patting on the back, loving, hating, do-gooders and do- badders, life is like your spice cabinet, we have to learn to tolerate everything or we become a hermit afraid to step outside and look at what's around us.

There is no perfect world to live on unless we have a spaceship and can find a new one somewhere.

Someone not long ago said "I went outside the other day, did you know there's people out there?"

I laughed so hard because it just struck me funny when I read it, but how true, it's a big open place with lots of opportunities and differences and,,,, well you get my drift. It will never be as we like but if we learn to like it it will be everything we have and can enjoy. Or we could hide from it and make like there is no Other stuff we could learn by or enjoy.

 

I would like to do that but I cant, so I ridicule you for it.. something like that.

 

Excluded for being deemed or judged as not worthy of conversing with.

 

Or, I say I can't and you take it as ridicule rather then as someone's real opinion. It's all depending on each how they read stuff that's said.
Now let's remember some could take one "I couldn't" but on a site there may be many and this might be where a person might then feel ridiculed. But on a place like the web that's gonna happen once you said your bit. You gotta know some are gonna see what you see and some are not.
The web is not a good place for sensitive people who can't agree to disagree and get along with it.

 

It wasn't my intention to make anyone feel that way. The OP is just something that's been weighing heavy on my mind for quite some time, and I really wanted to discuss that specific point.

 

I do and pointed out such in my first post.
but I always look at things from myriad perspectives and for some reason my mind always tallies shit up from a historical perspective of "how and why" for everything, and I find pretty much 99.9% of the time it reduces down to simple survival instincts.
Sorry, that is just how my mind works.

I completely and fully comprehended your intention from the title and first words of your post, actually. But you did specifically ask "What's the benefit of being judgmental?" and I gave the most fundemental reason why humans are judgmental; the need for group cohesion to facilitate the survival of the individual and the group.
The EXACT same dynamics are at play with the type of judgmental behaviors you are referring too.
Just because humans have layered language, civilisation and "rules of conduct" on top of those primal instincts doesn't mean for a second that we do not act in accordance with those instincts daily.

Hell, I could connect roller derby to that survival instinct and group cohesion and all that sorta crap, but it still doesn't detract from how fun it is to watch hot babes knock each other on their asses'

It comes down to the old adage, "Know Thyself" and part of that knowing is understanding the primal sourcing for many of our "civilized" behaviors.

 

Some people's words can hurt sometimes, and then who wants to converse with anyone?

 

Generally speaking I think people do it for one or more of a few reasons;

- Prejudice and malice that was gained either as a child through conditioning from caregivers, or a specific event that created a lasting distaste for the subject of the prejudice.

- A distortion, confusion, or disagreement with one's own perception of reality. Example; If you tell me this paper is blue, and I am wholly convinced that it's green, and I say, "It's green you idiot," it's because your answer, your fact, is different than the fact that I'm perceiving and I may be inclined to either think that you're just a moron, or I may be insecure because you've indirectly caused me to challenge a facet of my reality. Many people don't like when that happens.

- Because one sees something as a truth. If I say to a person, "You could stand to lose some weight. That's terribly unhealthy," I did so because I feel it's true. I may have been wrong to say it in such a callous way, and it demonstrates a great lack of tact and social skills, based on our culture, but the fact remains I hurt that person because of the version of truth I believe in.

 

Great post Nox, once again.

 

I wasn't refering to you. I was rhetorically answering mrmic to illustrate that we judge people for various reasons. We all judge and I just don't believe it's right to segregate the reasons for doing so.

 

but do we all execute? LOL

Seriously, I suppose your are right. "I wouldn't do that" feeling is something we all experience, I am sure, so that is a judgement, yeah, you are rght......

 

This is very true.

Fair enough. Way to throw a derby example in there lol.

Thank you, this is exactly what I was referring to. I hate to say people are a product of their environment, but sadly, a lot of times that's the case.

As far as your last point, I actually don't see that as callous at all. I would consider it a very positive way to present judgment. If it were, "you look disgusting in those pants. You shouldn't be allowed to wear them." then I would consider that negative judgment. For another example, there was a thread some time ago about fat people running. They're obviously trying to improve their health, so what does anyone have to gain from making fun of them? In my opinion, there is nothing to gain from that way of thinking.

 

Everybody has to constantly make judgment calls about how to spend one's time and effort, but there is a learning curve involved in respecting others who have different life experiences and points of view. I got a lot better at this after I started traveling to different parts of the country where everyone had grown up in different circumstances from my own. International online forums can help with this too.

 

I think the question was asking what are the benefits of being judgemental. Not how many types of judging there are, not what types of things we judge or whatever else some of these posts are answering.

If a friend, or stranger for this matter, walked up and asked me what I got out of being judgemental, I would not go into a half our talk about the different kinds of judgement there are, the instinctual origins of judging (which I totally agree with), or anything else. I would say, "I do it anytime that I see something that someone is or does that I am not or do not do, that I can look down upon to make myself feel that I'm getting others to think better of me and possibly to fool my self in the same manner as well".

I think the world of most of the posters in this thread. I haven't read enough of some of the other posters to form an opinion yet (judge? - maybe. Sort out for future reference so as to know how seriously I should consider their posts in the future? - more likely). Yes I know that is judging, but that surely us not what the thread is about. Does any one here, who reads at least 1% of the posts on hipforums, not understand what the original post is about?

 

The "I went outside once" quote is hilarious....LOL

 

This forum has helped me with that a lot too.

 

Words only hurt when they question our version of truth and reality. If they're doing that, it provides an opportunity to look into why it hurts, is there a reason behind the hurt and ca I fix it.

If it's just a person being an asshole, that's different.

But take the topic of weight, since it was brought up. If Moon, I was terriby over weight and you called me a fat pig and my feelings got hurt.. Why were they hurt?

Am I overweight, fat? Yes. So, you spoke the truth.. Then why did it hurt? It hurt becaus my self esteem is low because I'm overweight and perhaps mildly depressed about it because I want to be more in shape and active. Is it your fault that I'm not? Not it isn't.

So, really I'm upset with my own situation. Yes you were tactless and mean to say that, but my feelings are hurt because I wish to be an image that I'm not because I lack the confidence to accept myself as I am.

 

yeah....