You'd have to buy me one first. I would fix the person below me one of my famous Bloody Marys and tell them a story.
I want the bloody mary delivered soon and you can tell the story on here. :tongue: I will draw a portrait of them.
Overseas deliveries are out of the question. But here is a story from my birthday a couple of years ago. Well, my birthday celebrations took an unexpected turn. I had drifted into that dream-filled restlessness I now endure in the dark hours...persistent nightmares full of screaming children and burning faces, memories melting in my mind's inferno, when I heard a distressing pounding at the door. Panicstricken, I flung it open. I was immediately engulfed in an eruption of sobs, kisses, blood-red nails and heaving white breasts bursting from their scarlet bodice. This and the unmistakable whisky air caught me off balance. She easily forced me back onto the bed. And in an instant, she was upon me, her ruby lips around me, persistent between the sobs. Oh my fucking God! Unwelcome reality surfaced momentarily through the ecstasy. It was that crazy bitch again, the one who tried to kill me. Twice. She was back after a three month hiatus, clawing at my chest, biting, licking, salivating, overwhelming. She hungrily sucked any potential protest into oblivion, determined to unleash the wolf. Throbbing, pounding, reawoken and snarling, he threw her off. Ravenous, he took her in a frenzy of teeth, salt and sweat. I died as he overpowered me. My last memory, a picture of her, head thrown back in mounting pleasure, her flushed neck, the pumping arteries and the fleeting glimpse of a victory smile on her pulsing lips. I awoke, as usual, to the crow of the neighbour's cockerel, weak, alone and unsure of who I really was. __________________________________________________________ My photo is in my profile. You can post the finished portrait on here thanks. The next poster, I would teach them a few phrases in Thai.
I would talk to someone in Thai. Also, Emelia, you can't blame them for not doing it right with a scary badass panda like that sitting there!! :tongue:
You're right; my badass panda is pretty intimidating I would give the person below me a net, and then we'd catch butterflies
Thanks! I could do with a beer, ain't had none since 2008! I'll probably end up falling into bed with the person below me though.
Easy, I have a washing machine. I'd make him/her stare at Piaf's homoerotic David and Goliath sig until their head explodes.