what was your "I might be a little gay." moment?

me too, i still remember that first dick in my mouth and how wonderful it felt. I was hooked and turned into a real cock slut

 

I was 8 when I first realised that looking at photos of men would make my heart flutter, followed by anxiety about what it meant. When I was 16 I remember reading Hustler and felt a strong urge to masturbate when I saw a photo of a man whose penis was erect. It was a straight set of photos involving a woman giving him a blowjob, but all I could do was masturbate and cum imagining I was sucking his cock. When I was younger I could squirt cum three times per day…

 

Being pan sexual, I'm part gay and part straight and mostly concerned about making love without regard to gender orientation.The first recognition of the straight part happened when as a pre-teen I started fantasizing about having sex with girls I knew.

The first recognition of the gay part happened when I was seduced by an older man when I was 21. That was such a strong connection that I realized I was bisexual.

Then I met a dyke who was way more masculine than me, and I willingly became her sub for a few years. The relationship was so magical that I realized I could fall in love with a person of any sexual orientation. Pan sexuality.

 

I had always known I was bi, even if I didn't know what that was exactly. I especially had a fascination with cocks for as long as I could remember. After my first marriage ended, I decided to explore my bi side. I played with a number of men (and women, MF couples and MM couples. Kind of went off the deep end- but it sure was fun!). I wanted to try everything. I discovered some things I really liked and some I was glad I tried, but probably wouldn't again. I had it in my mind that I enjoyed sex with men- but I didn't think I an emotion attraction there or even realistically possible. Nothing like I had felt with women through the years.
For instance, I love kissing. The passion, the feeling of connection and intimacy. The first time I kissed another guy was a genuine turnon. So different than kissing a woman. There was the wonderful juxtaposition of his rough beard and soft lips. There was a more animal, raw passion quality to it Plus, the tabooness (for me at the time) of kissing another man. So hot! But didn't create any emotional connection. No "zing", as they say in Hotel Transylvania. And I was cool with that.
Until I met this one guy. From the moment we met, I was kind of stunned. I felt this instant connection. The first time we kissed, I felt my jeart flutter, a strong emotional reaction. It literally took my breath away.
This had happened with women, but never a man. I didn't think it was possible for me. But there was no denying it. Everytime we got together it was that way. For a number of reasons, it wasn't feasable to take it any further. But in that experience, for the first time, I could see myself in a relationship with another man.

 

Yes, men sometimes fall in love with each other, as taboo as that seems to many men.

 

Back in our 20s, my wife got her first vibrator. Once, after fucking her with it, I decided to stick it in my mouth and suck on it, as I put my cock into her now very wet pussy and began to ride her. She started rubbing her clit and moaning hard right away as she watched, so I could tell it turned her on a bit as well.

Didn't do that too often, but another time I decided to fuck myself up the ass with it as she sucked my cock. That was a big load in her mouth. I occasionally fuck myself with her 8" dildo these days while masturbating, too. Still haven't had any sort of sexual activity with another man, but I do like jacking off to gay porn from time to time.

I'm thinking I might be a little gay.

 

At about 10 years old a neighborhood kid that I was friends with would took me in my laundry room in my basement area and told me that he was so horny and begged me to kiss and suck his cock. Why I decided to drop to my knees and put his entire uncut cock in my mouth I have no idea... From there he insisted that he wanted to put his dick in between my legs but it literally wasn't big enough so I put mine in between his. We rocked back and fourth and it felt absolutely amazing. I remember that I asked to fuck him and he was adamant that we could NOT do that because we could turn gay!
We lost touch after 2 years or so because he became very popular among the jocks but I started to go over another close friends house and somehow (he initiated) we would whip our cocks out and and mutually masturbate with his mother in the next room. She was a strange short pudgy lady who slept in a separate bedroom from her husband. I remember her catching us in the act and telling us that it is "silly behavior and we needed to stop that immediately." I laugh now when I think back but she wasn't too enthusiastic about stopping us because she would leave and we would just continue.
Years later into my late 20s when the sex stopped in my first marriage I made my first visit to a Korean Spa/bathhouse on Sunday evening. I thought I had died and gone to heaven because there would be a about 30 naked guys roaming around showering, discreetly playing in the steam and sauna areas. I sat naked with 6 or 7 guys in the hot tub and eventually followed hung athletic tall married guy into the steam room. We stood there trying to figure out what to do with a few other guys sitting on the bench and he took my cock and just placed it between his legs and I reached around and stroked him for a few minutes until we both had a glorious, messy finish. It was at this time that I decided that I may NOT be completely straight! LOL

 

I don't remember exactly, sometime when I was 10 I realized what this feeling could be, but at 12 I was already sure of it. We tried and practiced with a friend of a similar age.

 

Looking back, at some of the clothes and hats I bought, and actually wore...really makes me wonder. My actual sexual on-goings had nothing to do with it (in my intellect), at the time...even though I was an actual cum-slut bottom looking for gay 3-ways!!! In my mind, I was as still hetero as the next guy. Go figure, eh?

 

First day in phys ed changeroom. I was noticebly smaller than all the other guys. I diidnt get any bigger either.

 

Dunno, i was severely internal homophobic, coz local authorithorian society taught me like that, and i cannot remember exactly when i find such a fellings coz i severly supressed it, all that i remember i find it somewhere around at 12-14 with overwhelming guilt when just watched porn and found furries, i like more androginous and feminine mans and furry many more feminine overally, than people in real gay porn.

 

I was in my early to mid teens when i found a porn mag in my brothers room. It showed all kinds of young men doing all kinds of fun things to each other. There were a few stories in this one magazine that got me stroking myself. A few years later i found a copy of a letters magazine that was called options, the bi monthly. These letters or stories described in great detail what two men or more could do to each other. i kept that some of these and used them as jerk off material for a long time.

 

When I topped my best friend while camping. We were 16 yo. Then somehow I always was attracting bottoms. Most of the time they initiated. Then you in college, while in the shower there was a professor looking at me and vI started to have an erection. I noticed his eyes and mouth watering and I became harder. After that we went to his house and I topped him. The rest is history.

 

I knew I was excited about sex with both men and women, whether seperate or combined when I was 18. But society,"norms", fear of friends or being caught had scared the crap out of me sufficiently enough that I was too scared to act, I'd drive and cruise and not blink back or not pull in, drive away scared, too scared to hold eye contact or nod if pulled up next to. kept the ABS door latched even though I knew what I wanted. For a good ten wasted years. There was nothing significant about my first blowjob other than the relief that I finally did it, the turn on of how it felt when he came and I swallowed. I was hooked, instantly. But that ten years....damn....

 

When I was a young teenager my friends and I would get together and talk about sex. It was what we would do with a girl, like we had any idea. We would often masturbate in front of each but I never thought about having sex with any of them.

The first time I thought I might be a little gay, ok maybe more than a little, was when I was laying on my back with my ass at the edge and a man was fucking me. This occurred after my wife had used a dildo on me and said that the real thing felt better and I should try it. I did and enjoyed it so much that I continue to do it with my wife knowing. God I love that woman.

 

I'll try to answer, "I might be a little gay," more literally. When my best male friend from across the street and I had sex from 8-13, including oral and anal, I never considered myself "a little gay". Heck, I didn't even know what gay was. But shortly after our "break up", I must've figured it out because I repressed whatever those feelings were, until I was 30 and my first girlfriend, of 3 years, broke up with me, for the third time. Gay desires just exploded in me when I was thousands of kilometres away from home on a 5 month road trip.

Back at home, constantly jerking off to gay porn would always drive me out to anonymous gay sex venues like video arcades and bathhouses for oral and anal sex. But every time I was naked in front of a naked guy all gay desires left me, and I ended up just doing oral sex with him, without feeling. But back at home all the gay desires for everything came rushing back, until all the jerking off to gay porn drove me out once again, for an exact repeat performance--losing all gay desire in real life and just sucking and getting sucked. So I never thought I was even bisexual, let alone "a little gay". I called myself bi-confused.

But then, after 21 years of sucking thousands of anonymous cocks, finally the gay desires did not disappear with one young guy in a bathhouse, but instead tremendous lust for his ass overwhelmed me. After passionately tonguefucking his asshole for over an hour and finally inserting my cock and fucking him, something drastically changed in me. My cock was actually inside another man's ass, and I've never felt such pleasure before. I finally clearly saw the gay side of myself and I not only accepted it, but loved it. That was definitely the moment when I thought, "I'm definitely a little, if not a lot, gay". I then stopped all anonymous encounters and started just hooking up with local guys in each other's homes for more intimate oral and anal sex, and I loved it every time.

That was unfortunately interrupted with another 3 year relationship with girlfriend #2, that was also filled with her breaking up with me many times. Close to the end of that relationship, when I found myself unable to cum while fucking her unless I imagined it was a guy that I was fucking, I knew that I was a lot more than "a little gay". A few months after that I broke up with her and was so excited to go crazy with my homosexuality. I now identify as gay. I have no desire to ever have sex with a woman again, though I still find them attractive. But now I find guys, the whole body and emotional part of a guy, attractive, and I've even had romantic crushes on a couple guys. I'm now a part of the local gay community, and get together weekly with a large gay social group in my region. I not only love sex with guys more than I can even say, but I'm ready to fall in love. "I am definitely mostly gay!" And I love it!

 

A wet dream when I was a teenager about men and the mental gymnastics I did to tell my self it meant nothing

 

Same, other boys' bodies in the locker room, I was very excited. I was young.