What is the funniest thing that ever happened to you while you were stoned

AHAHAHHHAAA!! Now that is funny.

 

I do that too.. say random things in a little girl voice. Once, while sitting on the couch, my girlfriend turned to me and outta the blue, she squeaked, "Meewilk?!" (<--milk) with this concerned/sad puppy dog look on her face. It was so funny at the time.. we still say it.

Also, one time, my roommate and I had gotten stoned and I was driving down the road.. and she yelled at me to take a right on this road that I was trying to take a left on, making me almost run into someone's yard and I hollered, "Man, how many brain cells do you own?!" Without missing a beat, she replied, "Two, but I'm renting them out."

When the movie The Grudge came out, we were talking about going to see it (while stoned) and my roommate couldn't remember the name. She said, "What is the name of it? Gotcha.. gonna getcha.. gonna follow you around.." God, we laughed for a thousand years.

 

Today, I was in my friends jeep and they have plastic windows...so like...It started to rain...and I turn to Mike and I go, in the most sober voice possible because I was entirely convinced, "Dude, the rain is so hard it's making the plastic windshield bend." ..."John, the windshield is glass"...3 pokes later he had me convinced...yes...it was glass

I kept sitting on this box of cookies...likie 10 times today...was only funny if you were there

A lot of stuff was especially funny today haha

I couldn't keep a straight face for a minute either...I was so hungry too and my friends were all sober and they made me go get my own food in the kitchen, where Andy's mom was...and like...omg hardest thing ever to keep a straight face...and then I just ran back into the room without any food haha

 

Oh god, I had to reply to this thread b/c I have so many weird/bad/embarassing stoner moments.

This one time, I was out on this hiking trail and we were hiking along smokin a joint and one thing lead to another..... We totally had sex on a rock just off the trail stoned as shit. It seemed ok b/c we hadn't seen anyone else on the trail and we were pretty well hidden by the underbrush. We get back to his car and there is what looks like a parking ticket on the windshield. Turns out, someone had been on the trails that evening and caught us in the act. They left a note that said "If you loved her you would've waited". I was mortified, because there was no way of knowing who it was or when they happened to pass by, so I dunno what they saw. My boyfriend was pretty proud of himself for some odd reason.

 

I was in the Army at the time, and a couple of us were out having a few drinks on a Thursday night and I was talking with a girl I had seen before until we heard last call. She flipped saying she had to be at work early and left. I didn't see any of the guys I was with as I got 2 for last call. I started talking to a local guy I'd chatted with before and he said that we could have a couple more drinks at his friends house and we took off in my car. When we got there, his friend said he was out of beer and whiskey but he had some smoke. I wasn't much of a smoker but I said what the hell. I think I took 2 or 3 hits and BOOM!! I was so waisted I forgot where I was. I looked around and they local had gone to the bathroom and I didn't know it. I got up and i think I hit the wall a couple times before I got to the front door. I stumbled outside and it took me a while to find my car. There was 1 truck and my car, I remember thinking where'd I get a truck. I finally got it and climbed in the car and before I backed up I was careful to make sure I didn't hit anything and wasn't going to quickly, then I pulled forward and was proud of myself and I picked up the pace. I was passing a few cars, and my timing with the clutch was perfect. I was flying down this highway and I was thinking that I might have taken the wrong turn so I was looking for the next exit, when, I hear a hard tapping. I'm getting worried that the engine is going on me, but it stopped. I hit the gas and the tapping is louder than before. I said oh fuck out loud, and the tapping got even louder and I looked out the driver side window and theres the problem. The guy that I drove to the house, that I couldn't find, was standing by my door and tapping the window yelling at me saying what are you doing? You left your keys in the house. I haven't left the driveway yet, I didn't even start the car. I got the keys and I carefully backed out of the driveway and smoothly hit a mailbox. Then I made a high speed run before I got caught and it turns out, I wasn't going over 5mph, and I was still swerving all over the road. He got out of the car and around to the drives side, to switch drivers. The whole time, I thought I was getting away. The next thing I knew, I woke up in my car about 3 miles from post, and it was after 1pm. I miss three formations but I was on time for the last formation.

 

I looked in the mirror and laughed at myself. Then went to eat some food.

 

Myself n 3 of my friends were heading to the clubs, about a 45 minute drive maybe an hour... we smoke a couple nice fat blunts before we left. In the car we had a bottle Nitros..Laughing Gas... and a big punching bag balloon... fill up the balloon inhale n instant dumbass laughing ur ass off... soo we're going high n laughing like hell nonstop just kept laughing n laughing n laughing couldn't stop.. we get to the club, open the car doors get out n boom, boom, boom, boom, like dominos we all passed out n dropped in the parking lot.... seemed like forever but about 5 minutes passed n a stranger was waking us up laughing his ass off at us... we were so high when we got in the car n filled the balloon we forgot to close the nitros tank so it was pumpin in the car the entire ride n the sudden rush of fresh air knocked us out.... it's funny now but it also could've killed us... but yeah it was still funny

 

A fuck friend and I were in my bed naked and kissing. Jimmy and the Doors were on the stereo singing, "Riders on the Storm"and I was toking on some Thai Stick. All of a sudden my mind visualized the notes of the music floating across my mind as the music played and I was actually sitting on one of the notes floating by with the music. It was a very cool and strange trip. I was enjoying myself and laughing at then experience.

Then she was kissing my face and I imagined a black and white cow with a big head licking where she was kissing me. So I laugher harder I guess because she asked me, "what are you laughing at?" I said a cow is licking my face. She got insulted and got dressed and left. I never saw her again. I really didn't care about anything I was in a different dimension.

 

A buddy and I were heading home in his car from a night of indulging and just out of the city limits where the country started and it was dark, around 2 am, we saw a huge white light up ahead just over the highway, about a hundred feet or less above the ground, shining down onto the road. We looked at each other and he slowed way down the closer we got. Wondering WTF was going on, we got closer and the light was blinding by the time we were about to pass under it. I stuck my head out the window about the time we were passing beneath it to see if I could figure anything out. I could barely stand the intense light and listened for the blades of a helicopter hovering, as that was the only thing that could remain in one position and sustain a light that big. There was absolutely no sound whatsoever. Just that intense light. He hit the gas and I looked back and the landscape was dark, no sign of anything. We were both laughing and scared out of our minds.

 

Literally everything. My mom is a huge pothead so she smokes me out every time I come over. She has such a high tolerance at this point that she doesn't even get stoned anymore. So then she starts talking to me about serious stuff like politics and whatnot, and I just start laughing my ass off. She doesn't get that you can't have a serious conversation with someone who only smokes like once a month, and you get them wasted lol

 

Aged about 20 got stoned with a friend and my then GF. Friend said he could never cum while stoned to which my GF replied she could make him cum. They both looked at me and I said "Whatever". She went to work and was literally wanking and sucking him for ages. Nothing! She gave up in the end and it wasn't mentioned often but when we got stoned again it was always the funniest thing

 

Passing a joint, not being able to connect with other persons hand. Depth perception was inhibited.