What Are You Doing Right Now?

Adorable

 

Waiting for a friend to come over. She's always late.

 

proping up my eyelids and trying to remember what it was that was important i get on the internet for.

 

Drinking my iced coffee still which I will be giving up soon for 10 days...I am suffering already thinking about the Master Cleanser diet I will be going on either Thurs or Fri for 10 days here.

I have a turkey breast in the oven now for Moxy's diabetic diet.....and 12 eggs boiling on the stove for the dogs' snacks.

i am sitting here lazy as shit now.....

I got the return of lichen planus on the bottoms of my feet back about a week ago. i get very huge , painful blisters that make walking around this house in slippers very painful....but I have pushed through exercising dogs every day here, still......and doing that my feet feel like someone is scraping the skin off of them with a knife. My tolerance for pain is high, though......and I am stubborn as shit.

Lichen planus is an auto immune disease that affects the skin, as the body is attacking its own skin. They do not know what cause it and it is not contagious.

i first got it about 7 years ago on my feet, hands, legs, arms and mouth......that was after a major fight on the phone with my mom. She was angry we bought a Kia here without her advice. She made me feel like the worst person in the world then and I wanted to die....and then I broke out with the lichen about a week later.....

This is why I cannot tolerate anyone trying to control me about anything anymore ever......I took it from my mom, as I loved her...and for many year's I had no choice.

This time with lichen, i know I have been heartbroken about Crusher and stressed out about many things.....and thankfully...it is just on my feet this time....Today, my feet feel a little better.

I know awful stress causes lichen for me.

This is the second time I have had it.

 

Enjoying my 3 day weekend.

Got back from swimming in the river today. I put on my goggles and I can swim really close to all the rainbow trout in this crystal clear warm water. I'm loving this time of year. Now my exercise for the day is pretty much complete, I hope to sleep better tonight without pills.

 

301pm

In waiting room. Enjoying some virtual wilderness getaways and listening to some Queen.

 

Looking at the site of a support line I'm thinking of volunteering for.

 

prepping an old kohler engine for an engine swap on an old lawn tractor (removing seized on pulleys ,clutches and exhaust fittings that wont fit in my tractor)

oil pans are different so next job is to get those switched out

then give it all a quick paint spray before jamming it in there

 

340am

Quite possibly having a panic attack. I've never felt tightened chest, shaky breathing, and hand and arms trembling, chest is warm. On the verge of crying.

I only have hf to tell. I am alone.

Not sure what a hospital would do for me right now.

I've never experienced this feeling in my life.

Posting this has been the only few minutes I can take my mind off of her and tell something about myself.

Chest is getting tighter

 

I am continually hitting the snooze button... having a hard time getting up for work this morning... these covers and the AC are too good of a combination right now

 

Wondering whether to cancel on a friend. Supposed to be going for lunch, but not feeling up to it.

 

407am

I'm done

 

Deciding what to watch on netflix.

 

waiting for a car to cool off so i can start working on it

needs exhaust manifold gaskets

 

isn't hitting the snooze button kind of pointless if you're awake enough to post on an internet forum?

i rarely hit the snooze button, but when i do it's only because my alarm goes off and my eyes won't open yet.

 

Stroking my cawk.

 

But here I lay one day later with the same predicament... alarm went off twice and I'm just laying here... need the weekend...

 

watching The IT Crowd

nerds and geeks and a silly girl who knows nothing about science and technology before Sheldon and TBBT ever happened...plus some good British humour

 

i just woke up

am waiting for my mojo to center itself and for my pills to start working

 

Day 1 of Master Cleanser diet....and I have put nothing into my mouth yet....nada....zilcho.....zippo.......not even water. I am supposed to start this officially with one quart of warm water with 2 teaspoons of sea salt dissolved in it. It is the worst thing ever.....and i am on strike right now....cannot bring myself yet to gag down that shit.