Hi...I am a little lost right now and found this forum.I am a little nervous and want some clarity and my sexuality. So, I’ve been out of the closet since I was 18 and at first said I was Bi, I did have a relationship with a guy but I ended it because I didn’t love him and I was constantly thinking about women. I am now 31 and I am very lost..3 years ago I fell in love with a women and it was great But there were too many obstacles in the way and we stopped dating. I am very messed up about what I find attractive. I have had sex with men on and off but I never feel anything emotional no “butterflies “ but arousal..my ex, was not wanting to date me because I had slept with Men and I said I only sexed them because I was getting over a woman. I’ve never had a long term relationship with a woman but find them quickly attractive and can gain, emotion, sexual arousal. The issue is when I ovulate I mastarbate about men I would never sex or date in reality?! I find this strange? Can somebody help or have a similar situation?
I think men offer something a women can not you may want to find out what that is and go from there but I wish u luck and it ok to be bi maybe find another women who is bi also maybe that would work for both of y’all
Life is far from simple and our sexuality is no exception. When we are attracted to a person, it is sometime a balance between wanting to be with that person, or wanting to be that person yourself. Reading your post, I somehow imagine that you like to play a dominant sexual role in a relationship and found it difficult with guys in the past. Am I correct in thinking that your attraction to other females is associated with you wanting to play a more dominant role, rather than an attraction to their bodies.? You need to remember that in the vast majority of both male and female homosexual relationships, their is still one partner who prefers to play the dominant role. At the end of the day, things could swing either way. You could either find happiness with a woman who likes the balance, or with a man who enjoys a degree of domination. (Such a guy would probably be having the same doubts about his sexuality as you). Only time will tell.
You talk about sex, but it sounds like you are looking for love. The two are different. And who you love or have sex with in real life is quite different from what you imagine in your fantasy life. It is really important not to get them mixed up with each other. If you are looking for a long-term partner, ideally you would want to find both in the same person, otherwise you would have some potentially relationship-breaking issues to negotiate. What label to apply to yourself is not as important as finding a person or people who fulfill your needs and wants.
Lesbian A place for gay women to discuss any issues relating to being a lesbian.....men are urged to stay out of this forum...it is in the sticky somewhere
What you say is so true. While sexual compatibility is a component of a relationship, it is a long way from the complete picture. That is why meeting someone in a bar or club so seldom leads to a happy and fulfilling relationship, while you will know far more about the true person who you meet in the working environment and physical attraction is the final icing on the cake.
While I agree that men posting rubbish on such a subject should not be encouraged, positive and helpful observations are an altogether different matter. Being qualified as a doctor and having spent more than 50 years working in the theater with people of all orientations, some who have become lifetime friends, I feel qualified to make observations and post helpful suggestions. Hopefully, neither Skip or the moderators will find my replies offensive.
No, dude, you are not helping Stuff like this: "You need to remember that in the vast majority of both male and female homosexual relationships, their is still one partner who prefers to play the dominant role" Just cringe, cringe in an awkward way. On this subject matter, please stop talking
Do you find that in most relationships, people equally physically enjoy both roles, rather than knowing that pleasing their partner is a necessary part of maintaining a stable relationship.
Hi guys, thank you for your responses. I particularly agreed with KathyL. I do want love in my life again. I believe that fantasy and reality are indeed different. I am not a dominant character But would say balanced. I think when someone finds you attractive, you can be attracted to their attraction for you and it has been the case with Men. I will go on a date this Saturday with a woman we’ve been speaking for two months and I am scared a little of expectations, I will go to some gay bars too I think. My brain says that because of the Czech Republic you won’t understand anyone but this is Prague
Don’t over think it just go with the flow and don’t think to much just be yourself and not someone your not let her like you for who u are
Agreed. Sounds like your well overthinking everything. Let yourself feel what you need to feel, try not necessarily think about the label
